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Where should boy and girl friends stay?

(21 Posts)
useby1oct Mon 29-Jun-15 15:38:13

My 21 and 22 year olds are bring their boy and girl friends home. Each wants their friend to stay in their bedroom.

waht do people think about this

willconcern Mon 29-Jun-15 15:40:46

at 21 and 22? In their bedrooms. They are all adults.

toofarfromcivilisation Mon 29-Jun-15 15:41:09

We had this a few years ago on a family holiday. Eventually my 85 year old Mum was the voice of reason & said they should share. They were 19 & 24.

chumbler Mon 29-Jun-15 15:49:57

of course they should share!

IHaveBrilloHair Mon 29-Jun-15 15:50:53


Azquilith Mon 29-Jun-15 16:01:43

Um, together. They are grown ups. Unless you're like my DM and won't have my DP in the house overnight despite the fact we've got a DS and I'm 31 and thus we don't see her a lot any more.

Theas18 Mon 29-Jun-15 16:04:18

THought you would say they were 15!

THey are adults. Together of course smile

catsrus Mon 29-Jun-15 16:05:49

They're adults - they sleep where they would like to sleep. I asked my 20yr old dd where she wanted her bf to sleep when he came the first time, her room or spare room. She said her room so that's where he went. Don't make it into a big deal.

AliMonkey Mon 29-Jun-15 16:09:28

I don't necessarily agree with PPs. They live in your house so have to live by your rules. If you aren't comfortable with them sharing then you tell them they can't. If you are comfortable then fine, let them.

cavkc Mon 29-Jun-15 16:25:50

The first time is the worst brewbrew

CatsCantTwerk Mon 29-Jun-15 16:26:58

I thought you meant teenagers. They are adults!

EvansOvalPiesYumYum Mon 29-Jun-15 16:31:23

I allow boy/girlfriends to stay over. DP and I are not married, so it would be hypocritical for us to say otherwise grin

As cavk says, though, the first time is the worst.

Young teens, no - there have to be boundaries, but late teens/young adulthood - they need their own space, definitely, as they can't afford their own homes yet, and need somewhere safe and secure!

I'd prefer them to be under my roof than in some dark and dingy alleyway or back of a car. At least I get to meet the guest!

GinUpGirl Mon 29-Jun-15 16:36:15

In their partner's beds. Obviously.

EvansOvalPiesYumYum Mon 29-Jun-15 16:42:07

And sometimes, friends stay over who are not boyfriend or girlfriend. They are just friends who 'crash' because they've had too much to drink, or may have had an argument with their own parents and need somewhere to stay.

There are some weekend mornings when I wake up and don't have a clue who I might be bumping into. Occasionally, five or six people in one bedroom. Nothing 'romantic' going on, they just needed a safe place to sleep. And that's fine.

Iliveinalighthousewith2friendl Mon 29-Jun-15 19:26:01

Together. They're 21 and 22 FGS.

Roseybee10 Mon 29-Jun-15 20:56:18

At that age together!!
My mum never allowed hubby to stay in my room, even once we were engaged when I was 21! It caused a lot of friction between us all and I wouldn't say we ever really recovered from it.
16/17 I would say no but over 20 I think definitely.
Especially if they pay digs for their room tbh.

useby1oct Tue 30-Jun-15 14:46:03

Thanks folks. Some interesting comments. As people say they are all adults. I was initially resistant to the idea of them sharing (but, it may be because we had our children at a older rather than younger). I think I'll let them share it's no big deal in the long run.

useby1oct Tue 30-Jun-15 14:46:54

er ... none of my children contribute to family economy!

seaweed123 Tue 30-Jun-15 15:44:27

I think it does depend a bit on circumstance... DH and I had bought a flat together by that age, so sleeping separately would have been ridiculous. But I wouldn't be quite so happy about a DC bringing some random person back from a night out, and then sneaking them out the door the next morning. It's not really to do with age.

GinUpGirl Tue 30-Jun-15 15:46:37

Agree seaweed. A relationship is very different (you want to treat the partner like family) from treating the family home like a cheap hotel. Nobody was suggesting that though.

MrsCK Tue 30-Jun-15 22:47:51

I met my DH when I was 14 so it was a bit of a strange situation in terms of where he would stay. He was never allowed in my bed and had to stay downstairs iirc on a sofa bed. Then we went to uni and it must've been around then that we were allowed in the same bed. but to be honest it was a single bed so we just kept the same arrangements going! we've just had DC1 and my parents have bought us a double bed to go in my old bedroom at I suppose really I was 27 when he first properly stayed in my bed! His parents were more relaxed probably due to space restrictions. we shared a bed from the age of 17 at his house. again, a single bed and not much fun especially when we both love our sleep so much!

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