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2 or 3 kids?

13 replies

Owleyes123 · 19/06/2015 19:03

Hello everyone,

I know it's an age old question and I'm sure this has been asked before, but I wanted some honest and brutal opinions on what it's like having three children! I've got two lovely girls aged 4 and 2, but hormones are raging and making me feel sad about never having another baby...but on the other hand it's great having two so I'm just not sure. I've heard some people say having the third was a walk in the park and others saying the leap from two to three was really hard. Of course those of you with three wouldn't be without your youngest but I'm just interested in how having another one changed anything/everything?

Thanks!

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lexyloub · 22/06/2015 12:34

Mu dc3 is 4mth I found it easier to go from 2 to 3 children than it was going from 1 to 2. Your 3rd dc just sort of fits in with the routine you already have with the older dc. My only tip would be to be organised try to get as much ready the night before. Go for it I love having 3 children.

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FoodieMum3 · 23/06/2015 12:40

My DC3 is 9 months old and I have found having a third so much harder than I anticipated. He's a good baby, although 'high needs' and we adore him but the last few months have been so difficult.
DC 1&2 adore him too but I have constant guilt about not being able to meet their needs, give them individual attention etc. I'm very snappy and at times stressed, whereas I was never, or hardly ever like that when
I just had 2 Sad

Now obviously I wouldn't change it for the world and feel so blessed we had him, but it's really not something I would do without giving it huge consideration (as you should for any baby really). It really can't be compared to having one or two children IMO.

It's just beginning to get easier now and my heart melts everytime he looks at me, so that helps.

My reply is very negative Confused

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MappingTheMind · 23/06/2015 12:50

I found 2 to 3 infinitely easier than 1 to 2. I have no regrets about finally deciding to have a third. Our third completes us, it just feels right. I work four days and DH works full time: life can be chaotic, our house is slightly less tidy than I'd like, meals are slightly less exciting, my older two get slightly less attention but those are small pieces to pay for the happiness number three brought.

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Owleyes123 · 19/07/2015 18:47

Thank you so much for your replies. Sorry for the massively late reply, I went away for two weeks then my butter rain completely forgot about my post. I'm still no nearer to deciding! ???? but thanks x

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MrsRV · 19/07/2015 20:58

this is me!!! just posted elsewhere about agonising over third baby. my girls are also 2 years apart but are 3.4 and 1.3. we're not in a position to have another yet but something i think about constantly! i know i'll always regret it if we don't go for it. 1 to 2 i found really hard and only just really enjoying it. first DD absolute angel & still is. 2nd one still not consistently sleeping through the night.

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Tournesol · 19/07/2015 21:02

If you like neat, stick with two. If you can cope with chaos go for three!

Mine are 7, 5 &3 and I love them as a team and the dynamic they have with each other but some times I am completely run ragged!

I just always knew I wanted three and am so thankful for my mini brood.

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fruitpastille · 19/07/2015 21:12

Mine are 8, 6, 1. No regrets but it's nice in the afternoon when the smallest naps and we can relax for a couple of hours! It's been a bit hard work as we got used to having older,more independent dc and no buggy etc. It will get easier. The older ones adore the youngest :-)

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Roseybee10 · 19/07/2015 22:03

I think I'm sticking at two. Mostly for practical reasons. Part of me would love another but I think I'm too practical and things like cars, houses and holidays would be so much harder.

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Sleepingbunnies · 19/07/2015 22:06

I'm 9 weeks pregnant with DC3 wil report back in 9 months! :)

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williwonti · 26/07/2015 23:10

This is me, i can't decide but hormones are screaming have a third, it's taking over my thoughts constantly

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RugMugTug · 26/07/2015 23:24

DH is currently adamant that we will stick with two. We both feel that we can give two children a nice life - emotionally, educationally, and materially. Three would mean lots of compromises for all of us and we found the first six months or so incredibly hard on our marriage both times. I feel lucky to have had two decent pregnancies, two easy births, and two wonderfully healthy children. Would we push our luck and jinx it by going for another?

A work colleague had a girl then a boy, thought they'd try for a third and had twin boys, one of whom has SN and will never live independently. My colleague very honestly says "I love my kids to death, but if we knew how things would work out, we probably wouldn't have gone for it again". Sad

I also have a friend who had two girls, thought they'd try for the all elusive boy and had triplet girls Shock. Can you imagine?!?

So it totally makes sense for us to stop now.... But I reckon if DH was game for a third, I would be too. I haven't got that I'm-definitely-done-now feeling but know that the best thing to do would be to stay in our lovely little foursome.

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williwonti · 27/07/2015 08:27

RugMug...that's my overwhelmng issue and concern. I love our 4 but can't imagine having to live with this "urge" and then the regret forever, even if it is a conscious decision. Can I ask how old you all are? Age is obviously a factor with complications (I'm 36 just)

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RugMugTug · 27/07/2015 08:35

I'm 35.

At the moment, I'm tired from sleepless nights, a little bit bored and frustrated at home and keen to get my career back on track (am on mat leave) so it's easy to feel sure that two is enough.

But I'm not sure I'll feel that sure forever, but am hoping the feeling of "if it ain't broke don't fix it" will supersede any feelings of regret. I hope anyway.

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