Want to enjoy my weekends but instead I detest them

[peppajay]

How I can my weekends more bearable? At the moment they are the outs. I hate Fridays as it means 2 whole days of being referee, entertainer, and general dogsbody to everyone. Kids hate each other and fight constantly, my son has aspergers and my daughter is never happy and full if attitude. Monday to Friday a different story they love school and routine and I get a break from the mundaneness of bring a parent. Dreading going to bed as when I wake up I will have another day of trying to keep them happy and don't think I can do it anymore ;0(

[meandjulio]

Yes I'm not a huge fan of weekends although things have improved massively as the younger generation get older.

So create a weekend routine? I just got shameless and invited people round with their kids, if they showed the slightest hint of being weekend widows as well.

[Lahottiereturns]

Peppajay, my son is only a year, so different to your situation. But I suffered from PND for the first 7 months or so, and during this period totally despised weekends. I felt like a slob who never got out of her robe as I was so busy dealing with everyone else's needs.

I have no idea if this helps but (as well as recovering mentally), what helped me was to get routine into the weekends as much as the weekdays. I sent my DP off to play golf or see his friends every Saturday so I didn't have to look at his needy face, and watch him think he was helping, when he was actually doing nothing but creating more mess and pressure on me. Letting him do this has also bought me a great deal of credit for other times when I want space.

I then built a little routine with my baby just for us....a fun place to go for breakfast together, then some shopping...visit friends with babies in the afternoon (I never invite them over because I don't want them to make more mess!)...then a visit to the playground before supper time. I also do not cook for him on weekends, I do that during the week only. On weekends he can have Ella's pasta and fruit and yoghurt and his favourite finger foods, and I don't feel guilty about it. As soon as he is asleep an enormous glass of wine for me and some saved up episodes of my low-grade preferred TV. I am usually pretty happy at that stage!

This has helped me...I realised that in my pre-baby life I was very introverted on weekends and liked my own private routine, which, candidly, was very selfish. I have somehow managed to create a similarly selfish routine with a baby, and it feels a little more normal for me. I understand your children are older and have totally different requirements, but maybe you could find a way to eliminate elements and pressures of your current unhappy weekends that just aren't 'you' and make you feel like the family slave?