What age to stop using pram?

[Lunaberry]

What age did you move your little one into a pushchair?

Got a bit of a situation with the MIL and not sure if I'm overreacting.

My dad bought us a lovely bugaboo cam3 which the MIL has always refused to use. She has dd every week and takes her into town but she insists on using the pram she bought as a spare for her other grandchildren 10 years ago which they never used. I was fine with this and happy when she swapped it to the buggy part when we did at about 6months.

But I found out today she's gone back to the pram part. It does raise slightly and she uses reins but I'm not sure how happy I am with my 9 month old still being in a pram.

Am I being unreasonable or would you say that's too old? TIA

[Pocket1]

Do you mean she is using the bit of the pram that you put a newborn flat in? If so I agree with you that a 9 month old is too old for that - they're not very safe once a child can sit up and move about. And at that time it's much safer to switch to the seat.

I switched DD around 6/7 months (but to be fair with reflux she hated being flat from the get go and the seat was better for her).

It's tricky to get bossy with someone who is doing you a favour by taking the LO (I know as my mum takes DD a couple of days a week). Can you have a frank chat with MIL and express your concerns? Could DH be part of that chat?

Good luck

[PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom]

Do you mean she's in the bassinet bit of the pram?

Well really it depends whether she wants to sit up or not. If she's mostly napping at the times she's in the pram, or happy to lie down, it's not really a problem.

If she's sitting up in the pram, I agree it's not safe.

What is your concern about her being in a pram?

[Lunaberry]

Thanks for your replies.
Yes I mean the basinet part that they go in as newborns.
She has got a reclining pushchair part for it and when we swapped ours over she did the same. Not sure when she's gone back to carrycot but I know a few weeks ago she said how awkward it was to get hers in her car as I offered the use of ours again.
My worries are that dd is not happy or comfortable in it. She loves sitting up and watching. When OH saw them in town yesterday she was screaming. MIL said it was cos she ended a nap and was fighting it. She was in the middle of a busy town in half term no way would she sleep anyway!
I bought it up with her this morning and her response was 'my prams not like yours it's fine' (incidentally our pram is longer as that was her argument before that it was too big to go in her boot. When we swapped it over nearly 3 months ago her feet were already nearly touching the end)
My OH backed me up and said she's 9 months old she wants to be sitting up now. Her reply was to talk to DD and say 'well Evie we're banned from the pram now'
Sigh! I feel mean but also wound up. Don't want to cause issues but I really hate the thought of her not being comfortable because MIL is refusing to budge!

[PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom]

It sounds like, for some reason, she is finding the chair part hard to use. It doesn't really sound like she thinks she's too little to sit up or wants to baby her (which were my other thoughts).

I think you need to stop pressing your Bugaboo on her and see if you can work something else out. I'd hate to use one of those too. They are massive and I find them unwieldy (it's personal, I get others love them). Maybe a cheapie umbrella fold might fit the bill? It sounds like it has all got a bit confrontational - would your DH be able to talk to his mum alone to get to the route of the problem?

[Lunaberry]

It's not our bugaboo she struggled with lol she can use that and fold it up etc.
it's the one she bought for her other kids and never got to use but she wants to use it as she says if she doesn't she won't ever get the use out of it!
I don't think she will put her in the pram now I've asked. It's just I could have done without the comments from her. (They were repeated several times) I wouldn't mind but she has free rein over everything else? She comes round every day to see her and this is the first time in 9 months I've ever asked her to do something how I would like. Her other grandchildren (who weren't allowed in that pram full stop!) we're sent with 8 page instructions of what not to do (no exaggeration I promise!) and she stuck to it, no arguments, never said anything to them just moaned about it to us!
Sorry I know I'm having a whinge it's just I hate any bad feeling and just needed to let a bit of steam off I think! X

[PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom]

Oh ok. I thought she was using her pram because she thought she would struggle with the Bugaboo so was making excuses not to use it.

And was then maybe finding the seat setting on her own buggy hard (hence changing back).

I also got the impression it was childcare rather than just visiting.

Sometimes it can be hard being a GP I imagine. You sound very considerate.

[bittapitta]

I can't see in your OP - is she providing you with regular childcare? Don't rock the boat! I agree the bassinet probably isn't the best place for a 9 month old but it's not actually dangerous, is it? Let your MIL do it her way.

[Lunaberry]

I feel awful now and wish I hadn't said anything to her.

It's not childcare at the minute I'm not back at work yet. It's just so that she gets time with her grandma. But at the same time when I do star working again she will be providing care for free which I most definitely don't want to take for granted!

She is a lovely lady and we get on so well. I know she dotes on dd and would not want her to be unhappy or unsafe so I do wish of kept my mouth shut. But at the same time she can be so stubborn and she does seem to have an issue with this and I just hated the thought of dd miserable and screaming. Also can't possibly imagine how she fits in it when she had outgrown ours which was longer!!

But still it's done now I've said it can't take it back.
Thanks everyone again x