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Angry re DD biting other people - need perspective please

(7 Posts)
GlitterTwinkleToes Sun 10-May-15 17:32:00

I am at my wits end!

Dd is 14 months old and will bite for no reason and usually without you suspecting she's going to.
I tell her no, that's not nice, we don't do that with a stern voice. She giggles.
I feel hopeless, there is not much I can do to discourage her doing this, or is there?

Reason I'm writing this post is me and DD went to see a friend of mine earlier, she has a DS of 20 months.
The two of them were happily playing in the garden, we were close by watching them.
Her DS kept hugging DD. Alls well, he regularly does this when he sees her and DD usually doesn't mind but I could see she was getting a bit frustrated with him being in her way.
Said to him let's leave dd alone for two minutes and took DD inside to sort out her lunch.
I called friend in, asked if she could watch them both whilst I popped to the toilet, I was gone for maybe a minute max.
Heard crying, I came back downstairs and was told that DD had bitten her DS when he tried to hug her again.
I apologised, told DD that biting is not allowed asked friend if he was okay.
She laughed it off, kids being kids and all that.

We left after lunch, now I've received a text off her saying that DD has bruised her son and she doesn't want to see us again unless i can control my dd behaviour! angry
I pointed out that she was supposed to be looking after them whilst I popped to the toilet, and she knew Dd was getting frustrated with her DS hugging her all the time. Her words that Kids will be kids, and she seemed very blaise about the whole incident.
Not heard anything back off her apart from a very passive aggressive status on Facebook about parents should know how to look after their children.

My blood is boiling, most probably that I am being an unreasonable cow about this.

I need to know how you managed to successfully get your DC to stop biting, like I said she's 14 months old, I don't think there is a lot I can do about it at the moment apart from telling her no.

Littlefish Sun 10-May-15 17:38:36

I don't think that there's really anything you can do about the biting at the moment, apart from remaining vigilant (which it sounds like you are trying to); removing your dd from the situation each time she bites and saying "No, don't bite". Your friend is being unreasonable and is over-reacting. Biting is a phase - that's all, just a phase that some children go through. Did she know that her son's hugging was annoying your dd?

GlitterTwinkleToes Sun 10-May-15 17:44:27

Yes she knew full well he was annoying her, she was stood next to me when I said let's leave DD alone for two minutes and then took her inside with me and even commented after that DD looked frustrated.

Heres hoping that it is a short phase then sad

BitchPeas Sun 10-May-15 17:47:17

Take a screen shot of the text you sent her, then use it to reply to her status saying..... I am assuming this is about me, did you not get this text?
Add in a PA smile for good measure grin

Littlefish Sun 10-May-15 17:47:19

The other thing you can do when your dd bites someone is to make a big fuss of the person she has bitten. This has two outcomes - it shows dd that the person who is bitten gets all the attention, and it also shows the other parent that you are taking it seriously.

MagpieCursedTea Sun 10-May-15 17:51:08

My DS can be bitey. It's something that he used to do when he was teething and it's now become something he does when frustrated (he's 18 months). We just tell him 'no' and explain that it hurts. He's doing it less often now.

I think your friend is being quite unfair, especially since she was the one watching them when it happened. Plus you're always better off without people who post passive aggressive Facebook statuses like mardy teenager.

GlitterTwinkleToes Sun 10-May-15 18:30:30

Haha that's evil but so am I

That's a good idea about being overly friendly with the Bitee.

She did have three teeth come through two weeks ago, hasn't been overly grumpy with them and she has her teething ring attached to her a majority of the time. I do think it was out of frustration that she did bite him and I am just bloody angry that she's implied that I'm a shit parent because of what's happened

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