Advanced search

What's for lunch today? Take inspiration from Mumsnetters' tried-and-tested recipes in our Top Bananas! cookbook - now under £10

Find out more

Will my baby forget me?

(23 Posts)
Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:00:38

I had my daughter in December she is 8 weeks old now.

It looks like I will have to attend a course at college much earlier than expected and I will be leaving her from 12 weeks where she will spend full days at a nursery sad I breastfeed and will be expressing for her to take from a bottle while she is there but I'm so worried she's going to forget who I am, am I being daft?

Does anyone have any experience in leaving their DC so young? I have a 2 year old who went to nursery at 8 months and I don't remember this feeling at all! I feel filled with dread thinking about leaving her sad

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Fri 13-Feb-15 20:03:53

A generation ago this was the normal time to go back. In the US it still is. It will be hard for you, but your baby will be

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:09:39

I know you are right penguins. Thankyou for that smile

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Fri 13-Feb-15 20:12:48

My cousins are only early 20s and that is when their mum went back each time. Closest family I know smile

In some ways it is likely to be easier than 8/9 months for her too as she'll be settled before separation anxiety kicks in

dalmatianmad Fri 13-Feb-15 20:18:00

I went back to work when both of mine were 16 weeks old, 12 hour shifts, they have survived grin

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:20:47

Oh that's so reassuring! Thanks so much.

Yes my DS that started at 8 months did have horrible separation anxiety and that wasn't nice at all. Made me feel wanted though wink

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:23:53

oh im glad they have survived dalmation grin. I'm feeling much more relaxed now already that other people have done this. Thankyou

DressingGownFrown Fri 13-Feb-15 20:29:15

My mum purposefully went back to work full time when I was a little baby to allow herself to go part time when I was more toddler age and far more aware of separation and would be 'wanting' to spend time with her. (1990's)

DressingGownFrown Fri 13-Feb-15 20:29:57

oh and I know I was breastfed not that I'm sure how she 'worked' it

Patatas Fri 13-Feb-15 20:33:13

Don't forget babies have no concept of time. She will be fine flowers

creamoftomato Fri 13-Feb-15 20:35:19

My mum went back to work when I was 11 weeks old. I'm now 30 and she's my best, best friend. All will be well.

ch1134 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:37:58

Bless you! She won't forget you. You're the one feeding her, and there for the important bits (bedtime etc.)
Good luck, and good on you for doing something you don't really want to do, but is best for her in the long run.

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:38:25

oh that's lovely of your mum dressinggown. I take it you survived too then?! grin all these different experiences are making me feel so much bettersmile

MoominKoalaAndMiniMoom Fri 13-Feb-15 20:40:28

Dd's been in nursery since she was 4/5mo, she's now 10mo and definitely doesnt forget grin

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:42:56

Oh thankyou all so much! Yes patatas you are right she won't know how long I've gone for.

And creamoftomato I love that. I'm so glad youve shared that with me.

I know it will be best for her in the long run, I just need to get this qualification!

Rhymerocket Fri 13-Feb-15 20:43:02

I had to go back to working when my two eldest were 11 weeks old. 4 12 hour shifts a week. They didn't forget me and both are now confident and independent lovely individuals. Biased? Me? Nooooooogrin

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:45:52

Thankyou for your kind words ch1134.

Moomin thankyou, I don't know what I was so worried about now grin

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 20:49:51

Rhyme! Love that im sure they really are lovely individuals. So glad to hear all these stories and all hearing of all these babies that have survived haven't forgotten their mum! Hoorah! grin

squizita Fri 13-Feb-15 20:54:07

Another way of looking at it - many dads are back at work from 2 weeks. My dh was. My dd recognises and reaches for him (and that's without the added closeness of feeding) so of course they'd remember mummy! smile

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 21:01:52

Oh wow squizita how very true! Never would of thought of it like that smile

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 21:02:35

I meant would HAVE not would OF blush

mynameissecret Fri 13-Feb-15 21:30:13

She won't forget you. Have you considered co-sleeping so you feel like you are closer to her. Anecdotally it is more common in America as it allows mums to bf at night and still sleep when working.

Also maybe consider a childminder rather than a nursery for a baby so wee as they'll get more consistency with just one person.

Shinystar909 Fri 13-Feb-15 21:35:51

We already do co-sleep mynameissecret and I love it. You're right it does make us feel close.

Yes I have considered a childminder toofor that reason. I will look further into that, thanks for the advice smile

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: