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Two under two... It gets easier, right?

(104 Posts)
Keepontrudging Sat 07-Feb-15 13:12:19

So... I currently have two under two. Ds is a very, VERY active 21 month old and ds is 6weeks. It is not as hard as I anticipated, but it's HARD! The lack of sleep is the culprit. I am assuming it can only get easier as DS starts to sleep better? Some friends have said otherwise which is scaring me... As once younger one is mobile you have two to run around after. I don't see how that can be harder than being up from 4am after interrupged sleep, but then what do I know really?! I'm new to all this ��

HyperThread Sat 07-Feb-15 16:05:46

I don't have any direct experience but just wanted to empathise and say it must be really tough for you but im sure it will get easier. Soon theyll start playing with each other. At the moment I have a toddler and some times I wish he had a sibling to play with, as at the moment he wants me to play with him ALL the time!

DeanKoontz Sat 07-Feb-15 16:10:38

I would say it gets significantly easier once they are both out of nappies. Mine are 11 and 9 now and it's great to go out the door with just my handbag and a little hand in each of mine. We have had some brilliant adventures that might have been difficult with a much bigger gap.

RufusTheReindeer Sat 07-Feb-15 16:13:40

It will get easier, casting my mind back I think it was better when ds2 was 1 and dd was 2 and a half

They were more like playmates then and could do more of the same things

I had three under 5 at one point and I remember going to an NCT meeting and wondering how the father of triplets managed...when we started chatting he was thinking the same thing about me!

tomandizzymum Sat 07-Feb-15 16:15:06

I didn't have two under two. But I have got four and they get easier physically anyway. My youngest is two and he uses most of my energy, followed by my 5 year old that is far easier than he was at 4. My 8 and 11year olds are the easiest.

nailslikeknives Sat 07-Feb-15 16:27:42

Yes, it does get better. When DS2 turned 1 he became much more interesting to DS1. Now, with DS2 nearly 2 1/2 years old, they can play together happily (when so inclined).
It also got easier when DS1 came out of nappies and could get dressed independently and also once I'd stopped b-fing DS2 at about 9 months.

It's so hard at the start, but every time you get on to the next thing weaning/toilet training/sleeping through it really does get easier.

In the early days, I got through by accepting all help. GPs took DS1 out for the morning, they brought food round, shopping delivered, etc etc every little helped ��

dannyboyle Sat 07-Feb-15 17:10:41

17 months difference here. Yes it was tough at the start mainly due to sleep, but different challenges came which were also hard, eg no 2 crawling and wrecking train tracks, play village etc which made no1 mad! Got a lot easier once no 2 hit 2.5 and now nearly 3 it's fun! Enjoy the time. Goes far to fast. Best advice is to be as organised as poss and make sure you have things planned to do.

AnythingNotEverything Sat 07-Feb-15 17:14:05

I opened this thread hoping for reassurance confused

I'll have a 20 month gap this summer (all being well) and you've maddening sound harder for longer than I'd anticipated. Bugger.

superzero Sat 07-Feb-15 17:23:28

It really does get easier and the time just will go so quickly !One day you'll find yourself doing something that seems challenging at the moment (supermarket shop? Meal time? Leaving the house?) and it will just seem better than it was 6 months ago and you'll realise how things have progressed.
In terms of running around after 2,even if you have 1 spirited child who ignores you,it is unlikely that both will be like that .I've got 3,at one point all were under 3.5,and as they have developed one has turned out to be the type that will hold my hand and follow instructions which makes it easier to manage when the other 2 don't.They all kind of look after each other anyway.The early days were hard at first but now they can all talk to a degree and interect it seems much easier.
And yours will both sleep one day!

myotherusernameisbetter Sat 07-Feb-15 17:34:26

I have 13 months between my two - definitely gets physically easier as they get bigger. two running about is hard work but fun and they play together really well when they are both mobile. Mine slept really well though so that was a great help.

I think concentrating on a decent sleep routine will be the thing that pays most dividends in your life.

myotherusernameisbetter Sat 07-Feb-15 17:35:28

meant to say mine are now teenagers and we all survived far!! grin

Keepontrudging Sat 07-Feb-15 17:38:33

3 under 3?! 13 months?! shock you ladies are legends haha. I am very organised which helps. I know how fat it goes so I am trying to enjoy ds as a newborn but everyday is so busy and goes so fast I take lots of pics to help the memory, wink

cathpip Sat 07-Feb-15 17:39:45

My sister will confirm it does get easier, her ds was 13 months old when the twins arrived smile.

Keepontrudging Sat 07-Feb-15 17:42:16

Jesus H Christ! 3 under 14 months shock HERO!

myotherusernameisbetter Sat 07-Feb-15 17:49:02

My mum had 5 under 5 and a half at one point. I'm number 7 grin

blushingmare Sat 07-Feb-15 18:45:18

I have 23 months between mine, so 2 under 2 for a short whole, but same principles apply.

I found 0-6 months pretty tough, especially in the evenings when I was tired and the baby was most cranky. This got better when we started weaning and food created a good distraction from the crankiness.

Different challenges have presented themselves, ie when the baby just stopped settling easily to sleep and needed a lot more of my input - difficult with a toddler around! I had a couple of weeks of "oh crap this is a nightmare", before I worked out how to deal with it.

Baby is 9mo now and I know the next thing will be he wants DD's stuff - cue big tantrums!

So basically I'd say different difficulties present themselves, which throw you for a bit until you've worked out what to do. But yes, so far I'd say the start was the hardest part.

Being very relaxed with number two and knowing that they're all just short phases that pass quickly in the grander scheme of things helps a lot too.

Keepontrudging Sat 07-Feb-15 19:17:56

Myother - whaaaat!? Crikey she must be super human.

Blushing- thanks. All you said makes a lot sense really and you're right about second dc being much easier as you know it will pass. 'This too shall pass' is my mantra!

MiaowTheCat Sat 07-Feb-15 19:47:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlazeofLight Sat 07-Feb-15 21:00:56

I will have a 21 month gat this summer (all going well). DS1 is still not a reliable sleeper and I am already panicking about how I will cope with the tiredness...

BlazeofLight Sat 07-Feb-15 21:01:17

Gap not gat!

MagicAlwaysLeadsToTrouble Sat 07-Feb-15 21:04:35

Yes it really does!

20 month gap here and the baby is now 18 months and it's lovely! They play together great now and it's positively easy (in comparison!) so easy in fact we are adding in number 3 to have 3 under 4!

Gobbolinothewitchscat Sat 07-Feb-15 21:09:12

13 months between mine. Currently 25 months and 13 months. Now that DD is getting more interesting, DS is happier to "play" with her. She adores him and thinks he's fabulous grin

We are contemplating a third must be mad got to say, not sure how the fuck I would breastfeed with two toddlers running about.

Keepontrudging Sat 07-Feb-15 21:15:44

Wow you ladies are brave adding a third. I am getting sterilised! grin

myotherusernameisbetter Sat 07-Feb-15 21:18:54

DP got the snip by the time DS2 was a year old grin

GinnelsandWhippets Sat 07-Feb-15 21:19:51

19 months between mine. Yes it does get easier although i am in the 2 toddler stage (22 months and 3.5) and that brings its own -ahem- challenges. A friend of mine witha similar age gap said she found that every 12 weeks or so it would get noticeably easier and I have found that to be generally true. When they're little they change and develop so fast that it's worth taking stock every few weeks and looking back - then you get the 'oh yeah, last month he was tantrumming over everything and now he's quite chilled' realisations. In the meantime cake and wine and brew for you.

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