Am I failing DS2?

[flipflopsonfifthavenue]

I know this is ridiculous of me as a type but...

DS2 is 5 weeks and wakes between 6-8am and then is impossible to get back to sleep for day time naps for sometimes 4-5hrs by which point he's completely overtired and beside himself screaming. I rock him for ages, feed him, wear sling around house, walk in buggy etc he'll fall asleep but wake 10/15 mins later which I think is classic overtiredness. Eventually he'll crash out, often crying himself to sleep in a rage. He then sleeps for 3 hrs, feeds then usually goes back to sleep for another 3 hrs. Bedtimes he ends up overtired again and there's more crying as DP and I juggling dinner and DS1 bath and bedtime etc.

I feel I'm making a mess of everything allowing him to get so tired. Mornings fairly busy with DS1 (2.4yo) and just general life I feel I can't pay attention to DS2 to work out his tired cues etc and get him to nap. Feel I don't know him and can't give him what he needs when he needs it.

Feel I'm failing him when he needs me

I've tried to "just put him in a sling around the house and get on with life with a toddler" as so many people here advise but I can't seem to make that work for us!

Will he be damaged by getting so over tired so frequently? I've worked out he's getting around 15hrs sleep per 24hrs which doesn't seem enough

[Greenstone]

But it sounds like you're doing all you can really? If he won't fall asleep in the sling especially that's tough because the sling is my big guns with dd2 (6 weeks). I'm sure you know this already but usually they need to sleep again about half an hour after first wake of the morning at this age. If he was in sling or pram by the end of those 30 mins would it help at all?
Does ds1 go to nursery at all? My dd1 has kept up her morning sessions, I'd have gone loola by now if she was here all day too - the days are so short and dark.

anyway - it's a hard old slog if you have a screamer, I know.

[Middleagedmotheroftwo]

Sounds entirely normal routine for someone with small DCs and new baby to me OP not much help.

He won't hold it against you when he's 18, and it's not going to affect his development. You just have to manage as best you can, and remember that "this too shall pass".