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boyfriend gets too angry at baby

(7 Posts)
catherinek91 Sat 29-Nov-14 12:13:49

My baby is 1 year old and he is sometimes v. Naughty, i try to teach him that the things he does are naughty bht my partner doesnt help me really.. If he touches something he is not allowed to touch i have to get up and get him away all the time while my bf just sits on the sofa.. He also does not interact much with baby, so i am left stressed as i have to cook his food, feed him, play with him.. The only things he does is chang ii ng nappies and sometimes bathtime.

I am very upset as sometimes i have things to do like make dinner snd lunch but baby is left with no interaction from his dad and i feel sad that he is just pkaying alone for a long time. He is breastfed still and i enjoy it but sometimes bf just gets frustrated at night and constantly passes him back to me.

I get up at night when he wakes and in the morning i am tired so i ask bf to feed him breakfast and he moans about it. I honestly dont know what to fo, if i moan at him he just gets more frustrated and acts kike its my fault

BippityBoppity Sat 29-Nov-14 12:19:35

At 1 your baby is not being naughty, he's learning about the world around him.

Your bf needs to interact with the baby - he learns through interaction with the world around him. When you say that he gets too angry what form does it take? Does he take it out on the baby, or has he just not bonded?

BlinkingHeck Sat 29-Nov-14 12:21:46

One year old babies are not naughty. They just like to explore and it is our job to teach them not to touch things/ do dangerous things. DS2 when he was one liked to climb thing all the time.

You say in you title your partner gets too angry but don't say much about it in the post. How does his anger manifest itself?

Trollsworth Sat 29-Nov-14 12:23:03

What sort of angry?

One year old babies aren't naughty, they're just learning. It sounds like your boyfriend doesn't really know what to do.

kiki0202 Sat 29-Nov-14 12:28:51

First thing is do you think it's because he doesn't know what to do and lets you do it because your better? Or is he just lazy and doesn't want to?

If it's the first he maybe has not bonded with the baby I think men take longer to bond and it's harder for them because we have a whole 9 months carrying the baby it's not until the baby is born that men can start to bond. I've found to make DS and DP bond strongly I had to take a massive step back and not be involved in their relationship so if DS was screaming for me I had to harden my heart and leave DP to deal with it even when I know I could fix it. I think also going out and leaving them alone or sending them swimming or to the park helps with confidence. I also tell DP all the time what a great dad he is and will say things like DS laughs so much more with you than me or he was asking for you all day to make him feel loved and wanted.

Loads of men feel it's mum and baby and them outside you need to bring him in try not to moan try positive reinforcement to force that bond and don't jump in to sort things. I have a friend who moans about her hubby not pulling his weight but after seeing them together she jumps in all the time and undermines his confidence in his ability to care for his child which then makes him pull away in turn leaving her to do more it's a vicious cycle.

However if he's just lazy that's a whole different thing.

catherinek91 Sat 29-Nov-14 20:51:29

No he doesnt take it out on baby, he just gets stressed about him.

He is lazy. When i ask him to get up in the morning he doesnt, he doesnt bother to look for a job either

I dont step in, i trybto encourage him to get him but hes lazy and would rather play games than deal with baby.

TerraNovice Sat 29-Nov-14 22:47:15

Why are you still with this waste of space?

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