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Health fears - the price of love?

(11 Posts)
clevername Tue 18-Nov-14 20:33:36

My little girl was admitted to hospital on Fri night because of a very high fever (she'd been ill all week and then got drastically worse on Fri afternoon. The doctor sent us to hospital in an ambulance). It turned out that it was a chest and ear infection and the antibiotics they gave us seem to be doing the trick (she was let out on Sat night)... she's had a series of illnesses, one after the other, since starting nursery so I can only assume that it's a culmination of this. As you can probably imagine, this was all rather traumatic (especially when they mentioned the 'M' word in hospital - they were going to test for it but then she perked up enough for them to think it not necessary).

Tonight I thought I saw a rash and, together with a lowish temp, got completely terrified again (that 'heart in your stomach, I'm going to do a bum wee' feeling). The rational and logical side of me had to notice that she was laughing and tapping her foot to Iggle Piggle's song, she was playing happily generally, she'd eaten a mammoth dinner (and wanted more) and had been in good spirits pretty much all day. But the fear still swelled almost uncontrollably.

I've always been a bit of a worrier, and I'm aware that a certain amount of worry is normal but this is extreme...

My question is - am I now destined to spend her childhood stifling voms and bum wees at the mere .1 degree fluctuation in temp?! Or is this a normal reaction to the trauma of a hospital visit with a feverish child and I'll settle back to an acceptable level of worry soonish?


Thurlow Tue 18-Nov-14 20:52:05

That must have been very scary flowers

I'd imagine part of it now is worry from that experience. But I have to say, I get worried whenever DD has the littlest illness. Drives DP insane. I thought I was quite a laid back person but being a parent has proved I'm not! DD had a temperature over the weekend, perked up a bit, got a bit worse... and I was Googling viral meningitis for an hour.

For me, the panic (and I know exactly what you mean!) is part and parcel of being a parent. In some ways it's good as it means you're keeping an eye out for anything worrying, but obviously you don't want to be calling 111 for every little bug. I've been thinking about a kids first aid course, the NCT keep running them, I think that might be a comfort.

CoolCat2014 Tue 18-Nov-14 21:11:31

I'm like that, though DD has never been ill. My brother died of meningitus many years ago, and I think it's left me a bit paranoid. DD had a tiny purplish spot on her leg last week and I freaked out to the point of crying despite the fact she was fine otherwise. blush

I think the thing is to remember these bad things are very very rare. I still don't know how not to be over-scared and over-worried. It drives DH nuts sad

clevername Tue 18-Nov-14 21:13:31

Thanks, Thurlow. That's so me with the googling!
I have always been a worrier - a bit of a self-confessed hypochondriac pre-motherhood... I knew I'd be an anxious mother, and I haven't really disappointed my expectations... but I've also been relatively rational with it, too (only allowing myself just enough googling to reassure; forcing myself to sing 'que sera sera' loudly to drown out any persistent irrationality etc!).
This recent episode has upset the balance a bit, so I'm hoping I go back to my just-about-acceptable level of anxiety soon.

natsukashi Tue 18-Nov-14 21:15:42

Oh god, wish I knew. Definitely sympathise. It's horrible, near panic attacks and can't cope with what are probably routine bugs. Thinking CBT might help?

clevername Tue 18-Nov-14 21:18:15

Sorry to hear about your brother, CoolCat. Must have been awful.

meringue33 Mon 24-Nov-14 21:54:56

I've had CBT for similar and it did help flowers

Buttercupup Tue 25-Nov-14 16:33:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clevername Mon 01-Dec-14 20:32:50

Sorry, just seen these replies after a Mumsnet hiatus...
I've heard that CBT is great - lots of friends have had their lives changed by it. Thankfully you're right Buttercupup, though - I've defo calmed down since I posted this message!

Stripylikeatiger Mon 01-Dec-14 20:56:17

What a scary experience sad

I have really extreme health anxieties about my children, dc1 (he's nearly 2) had a slightly raised temperature today (between 37.3 and 37.8) with no other symptoms, I was googling what could be wrong and I came up with the conclusion that he must have cancer. Just before bedtime he said "pain in my mouth" so I think he's actually teething blush

I'm going to see a therapist for the first time tomorrow, I hope they can help me to stop feel so bloody anxious all the time.

clevername Mon 01-Dec-14 22:26:40

Google has a lot to answer for... it can provide amazing help/advice/info/reassurance etc if you know when to stop but if you keep going beyond that point you inevitably end up convinced there's something terribly wrong and in a state of panic!

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