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Scared of spending the night alone with toddler - anxiety

(2 Posts)
FashionWhoreOfBabylon Fri 07-Nov-14 14:09:07

This is absolutely ridiculous, but I haven't yet managed to spend the night alone with my baby/toddler. He's now 16 months old (nearly 14 months corrected).

We didn't have a very good start as DS was born at 29 weeks and had to spend two months in NICU/SCBU. To cut a long story short, I suffered from severe anxiety and had a couple of panic attacks when we brought him home, partly due to some stopping-breathing-and-passing-out episodes he had while feeding. I was initially terrified of being alone with him during the day, but soldiered on with a bit of counselling and a very supportive DH.

Anyway, over a year down the line, I'm now fine during the day (albeit still a bit anxious, but nothing too bad), but I still can't face the thought of spending the night alone with DS, as I'm worried I'll have a panic attack when I'm the sole adult in charge. I have to have DH there, or else I go to my PILS, who are fantastic but live several hours away. It doesn't help that DS still often wakes up multiple times a night, so I'm typically pretty sleep-deprived. I'm a SAHM. We have no friends or family nearby who can help, as we recently moved.

I was just wondering if anyone had any tips, or suggestions. Has anyone had the same problem? I thought it would get better on its own, but it's not looking like it will.

fatpony Fri 07-Nov-14 17:50:09

Hi fashion, just a thought but have you spoken to your GP about this? My brother suffered very badly from anxiety with his baby (couldn't even be in the same house as him at one point) and he had CBT (therapy) on the NHS. They fast tracked him and it has helped enormously...
There is the PANDAS helpline who might also be able to help talk through some of your issues/worries. www.pandasfoundation.org.uk/help-and-information/pre-ante-and-postnatal-illnesses/anxiety.html#.VF0FtdogGK0

There is also general advice/sme exercises here www.netmums.com/parenting-support/postnatal-depression/helping-yourself/pnd-reducing-anxiety

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