Do some babies just not need sleep??(37 Posts)
Hi, I'm just curious really. Do some babies just not need that much sleep? I've tried every bit of advice and it's made no difference to my nearly 1 year old DS.
He usually has two 20 minute naps a day, around 10 and 2pm. Today I kept him going until 12 in the hope he'd take one longer nap. He woke after 25 mins and is now happily playing. I on the other hand am exhausted...he was awake at 5:41! (Knowing the exact time is always a sign of sleep deprevation in my opinion...every single minute is important )
I just long for a day where he takes a decent block of sleep!
Is mine the only one? For info he's cruising and taking first steps, eats well, no medical issues and settles himself at 7pm (most likely due to utter exhaustion). He wakes at least once in the night and I usually just give him a quick feed (bf).
I think it's time I just accept that he doesn't need to sleep - no idea where he gets it from, I'm on my knees...
I think some babies do need less sleep than others.
At the same age my DS was taking a 1/2 hour nap during the day, waking up at 7/8ish but not going down for the night until 10pm!
That's practically an adult sleeping pattern (if your a lazy adult)
He's now 2 and we still start the bedtime routine at 8pm with a view to having him asleep by 9. Sometimes its still closer to 10!
I've just reached the conclusion that trying to make people sleep when they're not tired is a parenting battle I can never win. (Right up there with trying to make people eat when they're not hungry!)
Not ideal I know- but could you catch up on sleep by going to bed a little bit earlier yourself?
My 7 m/o hardly sleeps in the day no matter how tired he is. Nothing I do to try encourage a nap works.
He is asleep now but only after being awake for 8 hours.
In the 12 hours he is awake for (7-7) I'm lucky if I even get two naps out of him. Even if he does take a nap it's only half an hour.
I absolutely hate it.
Ah. Was hoping you'd say there's an amazing turning point at 13 months or something !
dash that sounds so much worse than our situation! I'm so grateful for 7pm bedtime, although it's taken us the best part of a year to get to that.
I should def go to bed earlier but just love those couple of hours where I'm off duty, before the night wakes start
DS was a terrible sleeper day and night I was so glad when he stopped napping during the day it wasn't worth the hassle. I found that when I night weaned him it really improved his sleep day and night since he got used to settling himself he was about 11 months then I only fed him after 5am (though he then started waking at 5 all the time for a feed). He's 2.8 now and the second big turning point was getting rid of his bottles last month he's been doing 12 hours 7-7 every night since wish I'd done it a year ago.
DS1 still sleeps for significantly less time than the average required for his age - but then if its a true average, half must sleep less than that!
Aged 5, I'm afraid were still on 5.30 wakes, but he is now big enough to stay in his bedroom til the clock turns green
at 6.15 YAWN BUT, it is usually in one big block, so as long as I got to bed early enough, it is manageable.
He's probably averaging 9-10hrs a night, compared to the 11 the NHS think he needs, and he never did more than 40 min naps.
It get better, honest! (and no 2 sleeps MUCH better)
Weirdly, some just don't! My DD was a terrible sleeper for her first two years and even now has markedly less sleep than others. She stopped napping completely well before the age of two, but even before that we just used to battle for a 25 min nap - so stressful and she just woke up crankier. All I can really remember of my year of maternity leave is terrible sleep deprivation and anxiety and stress about getting her to nap.
We tried every damn technique over those two years. Thankfully, we switched her to a single bed before she was 2 and it was like a switch flipped - finally started sleeping through! She is incredibly physically active (crawled at 5 months, walked at 9mo) and has amazing speech and memory - so thus far she is proving all the books wrong about lack of sleep being a problem for development!
Some need less sleep for sure. DD1 - great sleeper. Two naps a day until 15 months (with lunch time nap of 2 hours) and still having lunch nap most days at nearly 3. Her sister on the other hand just about manages 2 naps per day with the lunch nap never longer than an hour. Up to 6 months, the naps were impossible.
I sympathise with you OP, it's not easy when they don't nap.
I have twins. One of them is like this. Has always needed very little sleep even when a baby and still needs very little now at 8 years old. His twin in completely the opposite.
If they don't nap but don't need to nap, it's less of a worry (though tiring for the parents).
It's when they don't nap but are a screaming, tired wreck that it's nerve shattering. That's when you find yourself doing anything and everything to try to get them to nap.
Dd sleeps more as a toddler than she did in her first 12 months. She regularly stayed awake for 8-10+ hours straight as a new born. I couldn't wait to get back to work.
Babytalk: my dd had a turning point around 12-14 mths and her sleep improved enormously (day and night). Combination of nursery routine and walking probably. So there's still hope...
Thanks for sharing your experiences. I've just had to learn to go with the flow. Sometimes he naps, sometimes he doesn't. If he's clearly tired I do all I can to get him to sleep but try not to stress if it doesn't work.
I can't help but feel a little towards friends who have two long naps a day in which to do all the stuff I have to do in the evenings. One even created a themed calendar with different fancy dress baby photos each month
He starts nursery next month so we'll see what changes that brings!
My 2 slept loads as babies, 12+ hours straight through each night from a couple off months old and 3-4 hours worth of daytime naps.
I was so
smug grateful. But it seems they used up all their sleep reserves in the early years as one they both hit 4, neither of them go to sleep until 10pm and are full of beans and raring to go at 7am the next day.
My sister had better sleeping babies than mine. Yes, really and even now, with hers 11, 9 and 6, they are all sound asleep for 12 hours at 7pm.
There's always someone better off and worse off than you
FWIW, my friends with poor sleeping/napping babies, generally found themselves with good napping toddlers. A small amount of hope to cling on to
I think some babies do need less sleep than others. My DS1 was in a proper routine (including for bedtime) from 9 weeks, but he was an appalling sleeper. Nothing we did made a difference. He used to have two half hour naps and then be awake and noisy for HOURS in the night all through his first year. If it helps, he suddenly started to sleep through at about fourteen months and to have a nap of at least an hour. He's now two and a half, sleeps for nearly twelve hours at night and naps for often two or even three hours. For me, the difference seemed to coincide with him starting to walk, which meant I could wear him out a bit during the day. Hopefully this will be the case for you as it sounds like your little one will be walking in earnest soon
My dc2 has been a terrible sleeper since birth, and from 6-12 months did no more than ten hours a night including three to four wake ups. And two short naps in the day. Not once did he sleep after 5am. I thought it was the summer light but winter made no difference at all.
Two weeks ago we cracked and did CC. In three nights it all changed, and he is currently doing 11-12 hours at night and 1-2 hours in the day. It is freakily different.
I hated doing cc but he is much happier and I have a life again. I dont mean I am going out again, I mean waking up in the morning doesn't make me want to cry, and I can anticipate and enjoy the day ahead. It really was that bad.
I know lots of people hate cc but I cant believe what a difference it has made.
Ds is 13 months.
My 10 month old does not sleep all day. She will very occasionally have a 10/15 min doze at around 10.30am. She goes to nursery 4 days a week (7.30-5pm) and doesn't sleep there either. She is on the go ALL the time. I'm just lucky that I get 5 days at work to sit down (office job). She does, however, sleep all night 6pm-7am, so I'm lucky in that respect.
My 5 year old has never needed much daytime sleep either. He goes "to bed" (his room) at 7.30-8pm each night but is never asleep before 10pm (he reads and plays with his toys in his bed) and gets up at 6ish. On a Tuesday, he does a whole day of school from 8.30am, has one hour of swimming, then another very tiring sport for 1.5hrs and gets home at 9pm and is STILL NOT TIRED. And I was told that school would tire him out. Yeah, right.
I, on the other hand, love sleep and would happily have daytime naps and be in bed by 9pm each night and sleep in til 12.
I was advised, whatever time of year it is, always lots of time outside, even better let the baby have a nap outdoors in a safe spot. All that lovely fresh air, should send baby to sleep, right? <Hollow laughter>.
Later realised that advice was actually as much about me getting a change of scene and fresh air as the infants!
DD doesn't need much sleep. At 1 year as I recall she needed 10 hours at night and 1 hr 30 in the day, so similar in total to your DS.
I'd strongly recommend moving bedtime later so you don't get woken at 5 something!
Like assumes, babies are all different. Everyone (including sometimes me, when it gets to me) is always trying to fix my baby. Except when ill, he is a delight during the day. He just Doesn't Bloody Sleep. 14 months next week. Apparently I was the same as a baby.....
My DS would have 3 hour long afternoon naps and then go to bed at a reasonable time. DD just would not nap at all, despite me trying the same things to get them to sleep. She just doesn't need any sleep.
I had one like this and at 9yo he still doesn't need much sleep.
14 months old was the turning point for us as that's when he started walking and finally sleeping through the night. Unfortunately at 18m naps disappeared all together though he had the odd one when he's been out in the fresh air
and i'd made him walk for miles.
However he's always been good at self settling unlike DD who i used to lay down next to in bed in a desperate attempt to get her to sleep.
Was hoping you'd say there's an amazing turning point at 13 months or something grin!
There is a turning point, but I'm not sure where it is. And it's much later than 13 months
probably puberty, sorry .
My daughter stopped napping around 18 months and didn't sleep through the night (roughly midnight - 9 am.) until she was nearly 6. But at 18 she can sleep for 12-14 hours at a time. (Which is basically the same as she did as a newborn - but it wasn't all at once then.)
My ds gave up naps the day after his first birthday his choice not mine and still woke in night for a bottle / drink until last week he's now 4. My dd is worse she's 12 weeks and she has a cat nap of 20 mins twice in the day and finally falls asleep at 11pm and sleeps till 7am ish I love my sleep and find it impossible the kids don't! Dd is clingy so not much gets done in the day tbh I have 3 hours sleep a night maybe 4 lol.
This thread is interesting as it seems to prove my theory that not needing much sleep overall = more likely to wake at night.
DD has only just, age 2.1, started to sleep through the night without waking more often than not. I think that before now she was just not tired enough at night and so would be more readily woken by teeth/cold/a pin dropping. She's been walking since 14 months so that wasn't a turning point but she's walking a lot more now rather than being in her buggy so maybe that's it.
I started a thread a while ago asking when those babies/toddlers who still woke regularly at night, finally started to sleep through. Most answers were somewhere between 2 and 3 years old.
So if you're looking for a magic turning point in terms of starting to sleep through reasonably reliably, that may be it. But it doesn't mean they need more sleep overall...
When they get to 5 and still never sleep through join me in
slitting my wrists uncontrollable weeping!
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