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No more babies

(11 Posts)
lynnekatiebetty Sat 25-Oct-14 21:28:26

Has anyone else decided that the baby shop is closed but is really struggling?
We've got 2 lovely little ones and don't think we could cope with anymore kids - the laundry alone kills me, not to mention nursery fees! Yet I feel so desperately sad about the prospect that I'll never be pregnant again or have a new baby. I'm imagining getting pregnant by accident and how happy I would be. I know that would cause absolute chaos for DH and the kids and then I feel really gullty about imagining it.
Do other women feel like this or am I going slightly crazy? I wonder if it's turned 40/ just stop breast feeding panic!

AlexD72 Sat 25-Oct-14 21:36:11

I also feel like I would like to be pregnant again but I have decided that if I don't want to stop now will I ever want to!
It's a very difficult place to be. I miss being pregnant and all that goes with it. It's hard to explain to my partner as he only remembers me feeling tired,nauseous and tearful! And really cannot understand why I would want to do that again.

Molotov Wed 29-Oct-14 19:22:38

I'm wrangling with it at the moment.

DH is happy to have one more; happy to stop at two. I can't decide. For every positive thing I can think of for having three, I can think of a negative.

I've been in this frame of indecision aince Jan 2014 shock

I feel now that it is now or never to ttc #3. I got cold feet last night and then felt sad about not going for it.

The thought of having another baby is scary (and the process itself; all the changes). My alternative option is to stick at 2 dcs. I'm 31yo. I get broody. No more babies is the alternative and I'm not keen on that, either ...

PrincessAnnaOfArundale Thu 30-Oct-14 19:11:11

Molotov I have stalked you for months umming and ahhing about it. I love how you swing wildly from one to the other. My mum and dad were the same over conceiving me apparently (I'm the last one of 3, they already had a boy and a girl) but I think I can speak for them when I say I bet they're pretty glad they went for it wink.

I think 3 is a lovely number and I am so so glad I had 2 older siblings. We decided to stop after 2 for financial reasons. DH has had snip now but it pains me sometimes the reality of no more children. It's not necessarily the 'baby' thing but just the thought of no more children, our family is finished but doesn't feel quite complete. Makes me tearful but I know absolutely we have no money and really struggle as it is. DH earns good money but we are in so much debt and slowly paying that off is the sensible thing to do. Not always what the heart wants though is it?!

Nerris Thu 30-Oct-14 19:15:39

You have to do what is best for the kids you already have imho. I wonder about having a third sometimes, but I am so exhausted from DD2 still not sleeping properly I don't think I could cope with a baby too!
I would take my stress and grumpiness out on the other children (unintentionally) and I fear it would make everyone feel a bit resentful and miserable. Also my husband is self employed so more pressure would be on him.
I just count my blessings and am happy that we have 2 healthy happy girls we can provide comfortably for, emotionally and financially.

minipie Thu 30-Oct-14 20:10:59

Honestly I'm kind of the opposite!

I'm pregnant at the moment and actually slightly dreading the baby stage... I'm very much not a baby person, didn't enjoy the first 6 months with DD at all (didn't help that she was prem and a very difficult baby). I much prefer toddlers and up so am struggling to look forward to another baby (though I definitely want another child). I feel a bit bad about this especially as DH feels the same way!

Maybe you could have my DC2 for the first 6 months and get your baby fix and then I could have them back...grin

Theselittlelightsofmine Thu 30-Oct-14 20:22:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Makinglists Thu 30-Oct-14 20:31:03

I have two wonderful DS and am very blessed having to go through much heartache between D1 and DS2. I am 45 and the issues we had relating to having DS2 were related to age. Doesn't stop me wanting another baby but I know it won't happen - I am probably too old, we physically/emotionally couldn't cope with DC3 and the stress of a high risk pregnancy would be too much. This baby shop is closed and I know that but dosen't stop me wondering what if...

findingherfeet Thu 30-Oct-14 20:33:31

Nah 'no more babies' is my mantra at the moment and it's getting me through this young age - sleep deprivation hell from DS and my DDs strops and tantrums (3 going on 13..)

I honestly can't do this again. I love my two, they're healthy and on the whole happy but cor blimey I find it all relentless hard work.

I know I'll get broody, I know my husband will want more and as more of my friends get pregnant, I'll feel a bit envious...

But no, I had good pregnancies and births but neither were exactly easy.

No I'll count my blessings and cherish what we already have (and hopefully sleep again!)

Hatetidyingthehouse Fri 31-Oct-14 06:49:26

Minipie - I hated baby stage with number one but loved it with number 2

Molotov Fri 31-Oct-14 17:05:42

Princess, grin yes, I am somewhat bipolar on the 'shall we try and have a baby again' front.

Yesterday I was thinking that my 5.9yo and 2.6yo are getting along fabulously: we can stay here, I don't have to get all fat again, have another CS, recover, lose weight, get trim, wean/toddler ........ we're fine as we are.

Then we went out today and a lady with a perfect 8wo came and sat right beside us. The baby looked like a tiny little doll; wrapped up in a knitted blanket. Just so beautiful.

And I thought 'Why am I saying 'no' to that?

confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused confused

I'll change again tomorrow, I bet. Fucking doing my head right in!

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