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15 month old wakes in night and screams until she comes in my bed!

(8 Posts)
kirdy Mon 03-Mar-14 19:51:20

She has always co slept with me and do did my other two when they were younger I did get her to sleep in her cot in her own room at around 10 months old (controlled crying so hard to do but she is a very clingy baby and would normally only fall to sleep being rocked and walked around for an hour or more) she now falls to sleep fine in her cot but every night without fail she wakes up screaming and won't stop until I 'give in' and bring her in bed with me which she then falls straight to sleep lying all over me! I really want her to sleep through in her cot. When she wakes if I don't go in she screams even louder if I do and lie her bk down she goes mental chucking herself around the cot and I'm worried she will hurt herself. I don't know what to try ��

mumofboyo Tue 04-Mar-14 10:14:18

go in a short while before she normally wakes and gently rouse her without actually waking her so that her sleeping pattern is changed slightly?
take the sides off her cot so she isn't 'closed in'?
make sure she's warm enough overnight: mine slept better when they started wearing onesies with warm socks so that they didn't feel the chill when the heating had clicked off and the house had gone cold.
make sure she's had enough to eat/drink through the day: mine sleep better having had a carb filled supper just before bed.
give her a comforter or something that smells of you so she doesn't feel too separate from you when she wakes?

kirdy Tue 04-Mar-14 17:28:06

She loves being warm in bed so nearly always wears a fleecy onesie and is always lovely and warm when I check on her. I don't think the rousing will work but I will give it a try. Just that 90% of the time when I do go in and check her she wakes straight up stands up and starts screaming �� I have got her a toddler bed but I was going to wait till she was sleeping through till putting her in it or should I just give it a try? And she is always eating she never stops so I'm certain she is full to the brim before going to bed. She is a very very clingy baby always has been I do feel bad sometimes leaving her to cry a little but I know its only me she is crying for. ��

mumofboyo Tue 04-Mar-14 17:56:55

Sorry I honestly don't know what else to suggest. It's awful when they're crying for you: you're frustrated because you just need some sleep and space yet you feel guilty because you know a cuddle or some comfort is all they're asking for. I feel your pain sad .
You could always try the cotbed (ds went in one at 15 months and we put a folded up double duvet under for if he rolled out grin and then a stair gate on his door. He was fine with it after a couple of nights; I didn't put him back to bed when he got out o just left him to play and now he just generally stays in bed and goes to sleep.
We haven't tried it with dd yet though; I'm dreading her being in an open bed shock grin blush

kirdy Tue 04-Mar-14 18:01:16

I know I do feel guilty because as soon as I pick her up she snuggles into me and goes back to sleep. I will have to give the toddler bed a go I just know she will be getting out of it screaming. Would you say just to leave her if she cries or keep putting her back to bed I have visions of her falling to sleep in random places in her room lol x

Theyaremysunshine Tue 04-Mar-14 20:19:29

I really wouldn't use the toddler bed unless she's climbing out of her cot. It'll be a disaster, I honestly can't see how it would help.

If you pick her up and cuddle to sleep can you put her back in her cot? Could you cuddle her in the cot (bit of a back killer) and then gradually withdraw?

Lots of cot time in the day playing and having fun?

Does she have a comforter, or could you introduce a special toy.

I've found the no cry sleep solution to be very helpful. It has a section on getting away from cosleeping too.

Sleep deprivation is hell. Hope it gets better soon.

mumofboyo Tue 04-Mar-14 21:13:54

I wouldn't leave her to cry; I never did with mine anyway - I wouldn't have thought the sleep they fall into afterwards is very restful.

I don't know if putting your dd into her big bed will actually help; as a pp said it might make matters worse in which case you can always backtrack. I only siggested it because when we put ds into his toddler bed and put the stair gate up we left him in his (safe and child friendly) room to his own devices more or less; but he wasn't crying and was happy to play on his own for a while before taking himself back to bed.

When dd (still in her cotbed) cries out we leave her a few minutes to see if she settles before going in. We give cuddles, milk and calpol if needed (very rarely) lay her down and leave her again, repeating as necessary.

Something else that helped my dd when she went through a patch of night waking was putting her to bed earlier - she now goes to bed at 6.45 or sooner - because if she gets overtired she finds it difficult to settle. We also make sure she naps well during the day by putting her to bed as soon as she looks tired - even if this is as late has 4-5 pm. Would an earlier bedtime and re-jig of naptimes work?

kirdy Wed 05-Mar-14 07:40:26

I have tried picking her up cuddling her till she goes bk to sleep then puttin her back in her cot but when I do that she wakes up several times in the night wanting the same thing so don't think that will work. Her nap times have totally changed these last few weeks she has dropped her morning nap altogether and has a long nap from 12-3 everyday. And we had been putting her to bed at half 6 because that's when she is getting tired. But last night we kept her awake and she was up with us playing and we put her to sleep at half 8 and she actually slept till quarter to 6 this morning which was a shocker so maybe she is going to bed to early will have to try it again tonight and see if we get the same results. Thank you both of you for your comments they have been very helpful fingers crossed for tonight xxxxx

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