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Parenting

Going to work so soon

4 replies

Stressedjustdoesntcoverit · 23/02/2014 22:06

Leaving my little man to go to work part time in April and he'll only be 2 months and 2 weeks old. Does anyone have any advice for me as I know I'm gonna struggle even if it is only part time. Or any previous experience? I'm a FTM Aswel

Thanks in advance x

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mostlyconfused · 24/02/2014 00:41

I went back to work after 9 months and felt so guilty for the first couple of weeks. I can only imagine how you feel going back so soon. The only advice I can give is to not give yourself a hard time over time. It might be hard to believe now, but your little one will be fine without you whilst your working. In fact. It will make the tine you spend together even more special. Try and enjoy being you and not just being mummy all the time when you are at work. It will help keep you sane!

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mumblecrumble · 24/02/2014 01:03

I read a brilliant article...wish i could show you it but it was years ago...where a lady lived with a small group of native people living somewhere 'away from civilisation' where people have very defined roles depending on their skills. and one skill was child rearing..and those people looked after the tribe's kids while parents worked. a lot!

Now, why i tell you this is because they did all sorts of tests around the question of do children bond with parents or carers, is it good for kids etc.

And they found that children had good relationships with carers...BUT when parents entered the creche area children's behaviour changed from being centred round carer to them smiling and beaming and radiating joy at their parents. they did tests and question type stuff for years...and found that even though children went to this creche as babies and spent more hours there than at home , the children's strong relationship and loyalty was with mum and dad, at least the people who they went home with.

That gave me so much comfort and it really was true. even when i did loads of hours and picked her up at 6 she was MY baby :-) Aldo she loved nursery, even from a baby and has very strong ties with staff and other families.

part time is good, though you may find yourself unable to give 100% to baby or job....but compromise is totally fine.

P.S. someone told me that the parent guilt starts at conception and never leaves what ever you do......

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Stressedjustdoesntcoverit · 24/02/2014 11:44

Thank you guys...I know it can't be helped as I'll be the only one earning but feel so guilty for going to work so soon and scared I'll miss out on so much...just thankful it's only part time. Glad you guys think it won't effect my bond with my little man too much, make me feel a little better I guess x

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stowsettler · 24/02/2014 13:53

Coming a bit late to the thread but I can only echo what mumble said. I went back to work when DD was tiny - only one day a week to start with, but she's been in nursery 1 day a week since she was about 6 weeks old. DP is a SAHD so she's with him most of the time as I'm now back at work FT.

She loves nursery (she'll be 1 tomorrow) and is extremely sociable, in part I am sure because she started going so early. And even though she spends much of her time with DP and their bond is really strong, our bond is easily as strong - if not stronger. At least, I'm definitely favourite parent this week anyway!

So try not to worry - you'll be amazed at how quickly you both adapt. Although I won't deny the first few times leaving them is hard Thanks

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