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End of teather with nap times

(9 Posts)
Haribolover Mon 17-Feb-14 15:08:54

DD is 11wks old and daytime naps or lack of are unbearable. Night times are ok as she goes down after a feed and sleeps through or wakes up once.

Daytime naps are another story. She just won't nap even though is obviously tired and then cries inconsolably. The only time she will sleep is in the car or buggy. However, she will sleep in the daytime on DH if he walks around and holds her. She just won't do this on me and it is now causing massive issue as am end of my teather with the crying every day. Need to find a way to get to nap on me or go down which doesn't involve me walking the streets every few hours. Even started thinking about going back to work as can't handle this much longer.

TheGreatHunt Mon 17-Feb-14 15:17:17

sad I remember this all too well even though ds is 4!!!

How do you feed? Will she feed to sleep? Have you got a sling?

I think what worked best was a combination of methods - going out for naps with ds in the sling/pushchair or if I had to stay in, making sure the room was pitch black with white noise in. I would stop trying after 15 mins though otherwise I would get too wound up.

Maybe your baby can sense your tension or would prefer to be fed to sleep if your bf when you try and hold her as your DH does? Also at this age the world becomes more interesting. I know it is hard not too but you have to accept that babies will react differently and it isn't a measure of you if she won't nap as she does with DH. My friends' babies would fall asleep easily on me sometimes because there was no distraction of milk and I wasn't wound up thinking they should sleep.

I used the sling inside sometimes - would pop ds in and do the vacuuming etc. Didn't always work.

How often is she napping? The best nap was always the morning one. So try about 45-60 minutes after waking to put her down for a nap-sit somewhere dark, give her a feed if she wants then sing and cuddle to sleep. My DD used to be entranced by my twinkle twinkle!

minipie Mon 17-Feb-14 15:55:06

She sounds overtired... also a bit of a sleep resister (like my DD) though you have good nights at least!

I spent months having to push DD in the pram at every nap time, especially if she was at all overtired. 6 to 11 weeks were the worst IIRC. Only constant motion would work to get her to sleep and keep her asleep.

It does improve quite fast though. The more I pushed her around to make sure she napped, the less overtired she was. This meant she fell asleep more quickly when I took her out, and she got better at staying asleep when the pram stopped.

Gradually her need for motion decreased until eventually I was able to just push her round the block at nap times - she would quickly fall asleep, I would go home, park her in the hall and have a break while she slept.

Then eventually I could just rock the pram in the hall to get her to sleep, no need to go out.

Also as she got older she needed fewer naps so the "pram times" were reduced.

I agree the easiest nap is the morning one. We used to do morning nap in the cot and other naps in the pram.

Haribolover Mon 17-Feb-14 16:06:07

Thanks for the words of wisdom. Nice to hear I am not alone and that she probably doesn't hate me. She us breastfed and I think smelling the milk is an issue. I tried wearing DHs hoodie on case it helped but didn't seem to make a difference.

Currently she doesn't really nap all in the day with me so is over tired. I think 2 or 3 during the day when DHAKA is at work is needed. Might try treating morning one like night with feed to sleep with grobag in (no really dark rooms in house in the day) and walking for afternoon one and see how we go. Need to sort this as it's killing me with the crying.

MJP1 Mon 17-Feb-14 16:14:03

have you tried putting her upstairs in her cot/Moses basket doing the bedtime routine you use, I found this worked with naps for my baby, try white noise, ( hair dyer/vacum cleaner is good) and watch for cues, my little one didn't really yawn she scratches her ears and that means bedtime.

Good luck xx

tidyupandeatyourgreens Mon 17-Feb-14 16:24:08

I would invest in a blackout blind plus black out material that you can velcro to the window frame as it's worth its weight in gold if you can get her to nap in a dark room. The sush/pat technique from the baby whisperer is also a good one. My dd2 has always had naps in her own room from the start (the morning and lunch one apart from when out in the buggy) and generally in the buggy for the afternoon one, although she's fine in the cot too for that one. However, there have been times when she wouldn't settle when we'd have to go out in the buggy/use the sling/breastfeed etc. I think as long as you don't use those methods all the time, sleep habits/associations can be avoided. Would a dummy work maybe? Dd2 is now 7 months and goes to sleep a lot more easily for her naps and self soothes by sucking her fingers (although teething has been hard work and she went through a difficult phase when she was 4/5 months so I understand your pain). It will get better eventually but it's so tough so you have all my sympathy. I've found that having a routine (loosely based on Gina Ford) is very useful because I know when she should be having sleep/feed and feel it gives more structure and control, even if it's just an illusion sometimes! You will get to know your baby better as the weeks pass and things will fall into place eventually.... x

minipie Mon 17-Feb-14 16:34:25

I agree with the tips above re white noise, blackout blind, bedtime routine/naptime routine etc. BUT none of this will work if she is overtired so get that sorted first, using whatever method works to get her to sleep.

PumpkinPie2013 Mon 17-Feb-14 16:55:01

Hi, my ds is 11 weeks and can be a bit like this. He will fall asleep on me but often fights sleep and can end up screaming if I'm not careful.

Like your dd he sleeps brilliant at night.

For now, I'd use whatever works to get her to sleep - car/buggy if that does it for a good few days to help with the overtiredness. After that try a darkened room (you can get velcro blackout blinds if needed).

I've noticed my ds is quite nosy so if the room isn't darkened or quiet he gets distracted x

tidyupandeatyourgreens Mon 17-Feb-14 17:03:34

I agree with minipie and pumpkinpie - and even the much vilified Gina Ford recommends doing 'whatever it takes' to get them to nap at certain times just to adjust their body clock and get them napping....good luck!

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