any other new breastfeeding mums out there?

[sprite25]

Hi! I had my gorgeous baby girl on Saturday morning and very happy but finding it all abit difficult with the breastfeeding. Midwife says she's latching on great but ALL she does is feed or cry. They say to sleep when the baby sleeps but the only time she sleeps is when she's feeding and wakes up as soon as she's put down anywhere and the only thing that stops her crying is feeding her again last night I had 2 hours sleep and hate feeling so exhausted when I have to look after her so much. Any advice on getting her settled somewhere other then on my boob???

[Quodlibet]

No advice but snap! Mine is finally asleep on my lap after an identical night so at least we are not alone. Congrats on your baby - mine was also born Saturday and is only 6.2lb so not a lot of margin for error. Hopefully someone will come and rescue us in a bit.

[Quodlibet]

Oh one thing - at one point in the night after a really long feed my DP took her away and jiggled her and sung to her in the lounge for an hr and she did drop off - he said he thinks the smell of milk from me keeps her rooting/looking. I think she was still hungry but at least it is possible for someone else to settle her while I get an emergency 2hr nap?!

[sprite25]

Congrats to you too mine is asleep on me too but dare not move her even though id love nothing more then to go in the bedroom and sleep even just for an hour. DH does his best with her and managed a shower and some breakfast this morning thanks to him but she still trys to feed from him and just ends up in a state. Oh the joys of new motherhood eh?

[Mamabear12]

I would feed my newborn (still only 7 weeks) lying on my side and could dose while he fed. Did that in hospital and doing it now as I type w one hand. Breastfeeding isn't always easy. I find this position best. ESP at night.

[DuckSongRocks]

Congrats ladies :) My DD is now 16mo and I remember this well.

Few things (you might know already):

• they have tiny tummies so need to feed regularly
• they are building your supply with regular feeding
• they're unlikely to like the Moses basket yet and still think they/you are one person

Tips:

• learn to feed lying down, absolute godsend seriously, even if you're nervous at first
• heat the Moses basket up and put rolled up blankets down the sides so they feel more cosy and tucked up if you do try to put them down
• get a sling
• if you don't mind then try a dummy to settle them

Very normal in my experience. At least you have a good latch, that's half the battle in the early days :)

[NomDeClavier]

DD is 5 days old so the constant feeding is familiar! Day 3 was probably the worst just before my milk came in because she was HUNGRY. I have discovered though, that I can put her down once she sleeps even if she wakes wanting another feed after an hour. DS I couldn't because he had reflux and lying down was literally painful for him so:

• get checked for silent reflux, often babies want to constantly feed because if they're swallowing the acid isn't coming up their throat
• try tilting the Moses basket or crib up slightly at the end
• slings are your friend, reflux or not!

You are doing brilliantly :) stick with it :) it does pass.

[sprite25]

Thanks for all the the replies, it does help knowing its normal and will get better. Had another visit from midwife who was reassuring and showed me how to feed lying down and to warm moses basket 1st, so tried that and it seemed to work....for about 5 minutes :( so im now sitting here feeding her again with THE most sore nipples while DH has a nap so he can be more helpful in the night.

[Trooperslane]

Ducks nailed it - listen to that

Congrats. A lovely but exhausting time. X

[Trooperslane]

Oh and lashings of lansinoh - I hope I won't be censored for the recommendation but myself and friends found it the best by a country mile.

[BertieBowtiesAreCool]

There is a really good breastfeeding support section on here, try posting there as well :) Lots of very experienced ladies plus TikTok who is a breastfeeding counsellor and pops up from time to time.

Congratulations on your new baby :)

[MamaMolho]

I would echo the advice above. My baby was the same at the beginning but she's 11 weeks old tomorrow and it does get easier. I fed lying down and co-slept to get some rest and during the day just sat on the sofa with lots of treats and the remote control to hand and just went with it. Congrats and enjoy your new baby.

[QTPie]

Very very early days: they may feed heavily in the dry early days to stimulate milk production (on DS's second night he wanted to feed for 10 hours straight!). The first few weeks can be tough, but it settles down as supply starts to keep up with demand :).

Agree re Lansinoh - magic stuff!

[TheGreatHunt]

Try not to stresss about getting baby into the basket. I had to feed for ages, then put them on my chest and wind gently to bring up the air. It was easier to settle them in the day so I slept then and dozed at night.

[sprite25]

So good to hear from all you ladies. Yesterday and last night was a bit of a mixed bag. Started feeling down and emotional so ended up having abit of a cry when DD got into a state and wouldn't latch on properly. I've been using the lanisoh and a nipple shield when its really unbearable. The midwife says that DD has abit of a tongue tie but that it doesn't seem to affect her latching on but can't help wonder if it does as I am getting sore?

[crikeybadger]

Yes, that could be why you are getting sore. Don't be fobbed off with "the latch looks fine"....it might from the outside but they can't see what 's happening inside the mouth!

True, some babies can manage fine with a tt, but others won't, so you may need to push for the snip. ( painless --and quick).

On the attachment, try and get a deep latch, bring your baby in really close so there is no gap between you, wait for wide mouth then bring to the breast quickly, chin first, more areola covered below the nipple than above.

Don't put up with sore nipples, you shouldn't have to be in pain!

[crikeybadger]

Oh and one more thing...if you really feel that you want to put your baby in the Moses, wait 20 mins or so till you move them. That way they are in a deep sleep and less likely to wake. Failing that just enjoy lots of skin to skin cuddles.

[QTPie]

What you are experiencing is very common/normal: you are doing so well x

Emotional ups and downs are normal too (especially tempered with lack if sleep). It is horrible, but it will improve. Promise. The first few weeks are tough and feel as it will go on forever, but by 5/6 weeks (I know that seems an eternity away now, but you will get there) things should be massively massively better. Things settle down and everyone (you and baby) has more of a clue about how the (new) world works.

Are you using Lansinoh after every feed? If not, do: use it proactively (don't wait until you really need it): it is a great "maintainer" (not just a "fixer").

DS did a lot of sleeping on me in the first 3/4 months (during the day). The important thing is to get a VERY comfortable feeding set-up (comfortable chair, feeding pillow, cushions, phone, tv remote, drinks, snacks, book - everything in reach): then sit back and relax (good for your recovery and rest too). I just gave into it and made myself comfortable along the way.

If tongue tie worries you, then you could get a second opinion JUST to make sure it isn't contributing? Breast feeding can be tough in the early days , but it never hurts to rule contributing factors out...

You are doing brilliantly.

[Jackanory1978]

My ds is 8 months now & I actually miss cuddling on the sofa all day reading books/crap TV whilst he fed. Now he's crawling & into everything! He's much harder to entertain now. Bf are 5 minutes at a time if I'm lucky!

I didn't realise until I had ds but newborns feed all the time, day & night. For hours! They need to to establish a good supply & the milk passes through their tiny tummies so fast that they become hungry again shortly after a feed. Plus they're learning how to feed, eventually they become more efficient. It was about 12 weeks when the long feeds started to stop.

I also didn't realise that my ds would hate the basket & want to sleep on me (no one tells you anything useful when you're pregnant!). I let him nap on me in the day & somehow got through the nights! It doesn't last forever I promise.

[sprite25]

Thanks so much for all the posts and advice, im waiting on a call from the midwife so will mention the tongue tie and latching again, although she said latch looks fine babies bottom lip rarely looks like its rolled out against my skin the way its meant to? (currently sitting here feeding her with the nipple shield as it felt like the end of my nipple was being bitten off :() I haven't been using the lanisoh EVERY time but think I will start, sometimes looks like my nipple has massive open cracks in it and makes me feel abit queasy anything touching it!

[Quodlibet]

Sprite definitely put lanisoh on every time. I am sometimes successful at gently rolling bottom lip out by pulling underneath on her chin with my finger if she's gone on wrong.
I have been hand-expressing today, just a few mls but it means my DP has been able to give her that with a before/between feeds to take the edge of the urgency.

It is so hard! Loads of good advice here, thank you MN wisdom.

[Jackanory1978]

My right nipple ended up with a massive open sore; agony! All healed now, but it brought tears to my eyes each time he latched on. Strangly once he was latched on it no longer hurt. I used lanisoh before & after each feed (doesn't matter if it goes in their mouths).

Bf was very difficult & really painful at your stage but I promise it gets better, & now it's ridiculously easy!

[sprite25]

Read up abit about tongue tie and all the things on there said exactly how DD is, spoke to midwife and she said to make an appointment tomorrow morning to get it snipped. Already feel guilty and anxious about getting that done to my poor tiny baby but glad that there's something that can be done to help her and its gonna be done soon, its meant to be relatively painless and instantly eases latching and feeding :S jackanory that sounds awful! Glad to know there is light at the end of the tunnel though

[crikeybadger]

That's good news sprite. it might take a couple of days for your LO to relearn how to use their tongue, but it should bring about pain free feeding - cracks are not good and shouldn't be dismissed.

I know you said you are anxious and of course you will be, but it really is a quick procedure and you'll get your baby back to feed straight away.

Hope all goes well

[MJP1]

Well done xx all great advice, rub breast milk onto your cracked nipples it will really help to heal them.

Relax and enjoy the close times, I didn't and now she is 10 months I wish I had let her sleep on me when she was ickle I was quick to put her in her Moses basket or cot, she is a wonderful sleeper but will not sleep on me now she is a stickler for her own space.

Congratulations xxx

[allyoopkry]

That's normal for the first while. Baby doesn't understand she is a separate reason from you. All new borns do is sleep eat and cry. Oh and poo
Your baby will gradually become more content with being placed down as she gets older. Right now she is scared and unsure. Have someone else hold her so you can get some sleep. It will get easier! My babe is 4 months and it's such a big difference from when she was a new born.