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Talk to me about dummy weaning

(35 Posts)
IndecisivePramBuyer81 Sat 09-Nov-13 23:29:50

So the dummy was once a miracle cure for getting our refluxy and sleep fighting DS to calm down and even soothe himself to sleep...not anymore. It's fast becoming the bane of my life and I'm up anywhere from 3 to 8 times a night replacing the bloody thing. Basically until I cave and pull him in with me.

I've realised that we need to go cold turkey, but I'm nervous and dreading the battle sad I have visions of him desperately trying to settle himself like some kind of addict and I'm surely going to wind up rocking and cuddling to get him through creating another sleep crutchconfused

I wondered if anyone could share any positive experiences of dummy weaning to give me hope? or any tips perhaps? words of encouragement needed!

Flatasawitchestit Sat 09-Nov-13 23:34:11

How old is he? I sympathise as my baby has one and she loses hers too, but she's next to us so I slide hands into cot and replace if she hasn't already done so.

My sister used to give her little one 3 when he went to bed, one for him to suck on and one for each hand blush it stopped her having to get up.

I have no idea how to help otherwise as my other children were 2 when we left theirs out for the dummy fairy. I'd love to get rid of it sooner so will,be watching with interest.

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Sat 09-Nov-13 23:49:02

He's 19 weeks on Monday..I wasn't planning to worry about it yet but I'm struggling with the constant replacing sad I thought about putting several in but he doesn't have the coordination to put them in his mouth!

Jorior Sun 10-Nov-13 06:34:36

I don't have a suggestion, sorry, but I think he's very young and clearly needs some form of comfort which is why he cries out when he loses his dummy. Therefore, you could have a real struggle on your hands to wean him off it. I agree with the other poster that it may be a good idea to put several in his cot to see if that works. Oh, also a friend of mine put glow in the dark pen on the back of her dummies so they were easier to see in the dark. Good luck!

MsJupiterJones Sun 10-Nov-13 08:32:01

DS (1) has a dummy, he went through the same phase but then learned to find it himself. We use glow in the dark Mam dummies & keep a spare to hand.

You can get a bunny thing to attach to the dummy to help him find it if that would make it easier.

Obviously that doesn't answer how to wean him off it and we have yet to tackle that but it sounds like your DS has benefited from his in terms of reflux etc so maybe better to work with it for a while yet?

MsJupiterJones Sun 10-Nov-13 08:34:41

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Sun 10-Nov-13 11:42:59

Hmm that's interesting. .He's not in his cot yet and still in his moses basket but I'll try putting a few in around him first. I don't particularly want to take them off him yet for all the reasons you've mentioned but for the sake of my sanity it was looking like my only option!

forgetmenots Sun 10-Nov-13 13:53:37

definitely recommend the Sleepytot ('dummy bunny') - our DS has four dummies in his cot and we're hoping that we can wean him one by one... and then he'll still have the lovely bunny to cuddle. We've stopped giving him dummies at any other time than when he's in his cot or buggy too (so, when he wants to nap or sleep) - as he started looking for it at other times.

I'm a bit annoyed with myself that it's become such a prop for him sleeping but like you he had issues with reflux and is a 'sucky baby' - it really helped him settle and comforted him when he was just newborn (He's five months now).

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Sun 10-Nov-13 15:16:14

Can he find and put a dummy back in his mouth? We're going to try putting him in his cot (he's still in a moses basket) tonight and putting a load of dummies in with him and see what happens..he hasn't managed to put one in his mouth yet that I've seen though. He only has it when he wants to sleep which I spose is a good thing but getting up in the night is driving me up the wall!

forgetmenots Sun 10-Nov-13 15:31:15

He couldn't until we started on the sleepytot (think because it's bigger he doesn't have to be so precise - we got a large one on amazon). Has cut the dummy runs drastically, only maybe once a night now (if the dummy is beyond reach, he is in his cot now).

Only thing is that he likes to pull the bunny over his face, we've got an angelcare sensor mat which makes me feel a wee bit easier about this, because I was worried that he might pull it right over some night. Now though he seems happy to just cuddle it and pull the dummy in and out. I started the bunny for naps and night time sleep just to get him used to it. It took maybe four nights!

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Sun 10-Nov-13 15:50:42

Ok, ordered and on its way! am glad I signed up for the free trial of Amazon Prime now! I have high hopes smile

forgetmenots Sun 10-Nov-13 15:52:50

I was ready to chuck it out after a couple of days as I was still doing all the dummy runs but give it a few days and see. Doesn't work for all, but I haven't yet met someone who says it didn't help at all. Fingers crossed for you! smile

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Mon 11-Nov-13 07:28:48

Well that was a complete effing disaster..back in bed with me by 1am after a massive clean up operation involving sick in his eyes/nose left him too awake to go tp sleep in his moses basket. 4 dummies definitely did not help.

Honestly, he's worse now than he was newborn. It's doing our heads in sad

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Mon 11-Nov-13 07:29:20

I have lower hopes for that bunny now!

forgetmenots Mon 11-Nov-13 09:53:12

Awww poor wee guy. That sounds like a (quite scary for you both) one off, don't lose heart! Btw the four dummies don't work for my DS either, too small for him to find and put in his mouth correctly! Only the bloody bunny has worked. I really hope it helps you cut down the runs sad

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Mon 11-Nov-13 11:19:59

Will try again tonight and hopefully the bunny will arrive tmw and won't take him too long to learn. I dread bedtime these days, and don't get to catch up during the day because he won't sleep more than 45mins on his own. sad

MrFranklyShankly Tue 12-Nov-13 12:08:47

How did you get on indecisive ??? My dd is the same age as your ds,19 weeks, and we are having same probs, was up last night so less than 11 times putting in her dummy, I got more sleep when she was getting two feeds at night, am so tired I just can't function, so really hoping to see a miracle cure to this on this thread. Feel she is too young to wean off her dummy but really at breaking point with the lack of sleep ( all over a dummy)


ZebraZeebra Tue 12-Nov-13 12:26:55

DS is almost 13 months - we've completely weaned daytime use but I still offer them to him at night because - frankly - there's so many other issues, the use of dummy for sleep is the least of my problems.

For daytime weaning - I literally just stopped handing them to him. This was around nine months. He was interested in other things so it was easy to distract him. To be honest, it was more effort for me to remember not to hand them to him! I had to wean myself wink

I might check out the bunny thing - the thing likely to induce irrational bedtime rage in me is seeing him chuck multiple dummies down the back of the cot, where they are completely unreachable!

angel24711 Tue 12-Nov-13 13:49:35

We went cold turkey at 20 weeks. We replaced the dummy with two Cuskis. Worked a treat. We had a little bit of crying the first night and by the second night he didn't seem to miss the dummy. Previously he'd been waking 3 or 4 times a night because he had lost his dummy.
He's now 9 months and he now has 3 Cuskis which he loves to cuddle and suck.

IndecisivePramBuyer81 Tue 12-Nov-13 14:34:38

What's a Cuski?

More disaster but not (exclusively) dummy related sad this time he projectiled up what seemed like most of his 8oz bottle when I was trying to burp him, cleaned up, finished bottle and a cuddle when he started coughing/choking but couldn't get anything up for a while until he was sick again.

Tbh, dummies are now the least of my worries! Just come from Drs and the best advice they have is 'feed him smaller bottles more often' as if that was the answer to all our reflux woesangry hmm shock

So at the mo, I'm allowing him his dummy but I still need the answer to getting rid when the reflux is sorted!

MrFranklyShankly Tue 12-Nov-13 18:57:19

Oh your poor ds and you, my dd has reflu as well, but yeah you have bigger things to sort for him first before getting rid of the dody. Yeah what is a cuski angel???? Very interested to hear more

loveroflife Tue 12-Nov-13 20:53:03

OP - I am now the happiest mother in the world after getting rid of the dummy.

I kid you not, I was going in EVERY HOUR to put the dummy in for 6mo ds - he had it since birth and it was a godsend in the early days as he would feed and suck for hours.

However, it was actually having the adverse effect - keeping him awake! We were in a cycle of him needing it to go to sleep then waking up as soon as it fell out - he was literally in 1 hour sleep cycles all night and for naps.

I also gave him a very soft muslin cloth as well and he loved that so had both.

After yet another horrendous nights sleep I had enough and decided a month ago, that would be it. I binned all the dummies so I wouldn't give in and took him out for the day as I knew it would be hell to listen to him cry when I put him down.

This was a brilliant idea. We walked into town and when it was time for the nap, reclined the buggy and gave him his muslin. Yes, he did cry but it was less painful listening to it with the sound of traffic, wind etc and I think that also distracted him.

Same thing for the next nap - reclined buggy and we were walking in and out of shops, he cried again but snuggled into the muslin and fell asleep.

For his last nap of the day I literally just drove around = again, the car noise and radio distracted him and he had his muslin to hold against his face.

So, that's how I weaned him - he had his three naps but out and about, so less distress for us both. I promise you that night after crying for 10mins (I kept going back in and stroking his face and the muslin against his face) he fell asleep and slept through.

His sleep has improved 100% - he sleeps though and still has a comforter in the form of his muslin - safe, soft and breathable.

Also, they're better than a special toy as you can never lose a pack of 10 of them (the M and S ones are soooo soft!)

Good luck - it was the best thing I ever did. Sometimes he sucks the muslin, sometimes just snuggles up to it - it may help to wear it first in your top or sleep with it so when you take away the dummy and give him the cloth, it will smell of you.

reflux: ask the gp to give you ranitidine - don't leave until you have a prescription for it!!!

loveroflife Tue 12-Nov-13 20:57:00

oh and I bought a cuski - it was £15 and not worth it imo..muslin, cheaper and softer and less chance of losing them.

forgetmenots Wed 13-Nov-13 00:15:03

Like your approach loveroflife - when it comes to weaning DS off his dummy bunny I may follow you if he struggles...!

googietheegg Wed 13-Nov-13 09:56:44

Deffo get a sleepytot (we have a spare couple too!!!). You hug it for a bit first so it's got your scent on it. Changed my life!!!!

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