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So... If you DC has a different / unpopular name...

(95 Posts)
ElBombero Mon 07-Oct-13 19:57:14

If you've chosen a slightly different name have you had a wobble about it later?

I am and just hoping it passes...

Thurlow Tue 29-Oct-13 20:12:38

We've not had great feedback about DD's name. It's 5 syllables long and a variant on a classic name and the name of a city, MN sin there and we've had a lot of "that's a mouthful" comments. We actually use the shortened version every day, which I don't think is enormously common for girls at the moment, some people see as a boys name, and some people see as a bit 80s - but not in a good way. So all round I think there are a lot of people who don't like it.

But as other posters say - it's now her name, and she rocks it. The tomboy name really suits her.

EverythingUnderControl Tue 29-Oct-13 20:02:59

I think it takes a while for a baby to 'become' the name they have. It can't mean them until their little personality takes possession of it and then the name and the person become inextricably linked in eveyone's mind. Until then it sounds like a name with no reference.

Of course that takes a while because it takes a little time for a personality to shine through until the baby grows.

If you liked the name enough to give it to your baby, just wait for him to fill it out with all the things that'll mean him alone.

All my dc have uncommon names. They're not unheard of names, just uncommon. Ds especially. Mil would only ever call him by his middle name for the first few weeks after he was born claiming she kept 'forgetting'hmm. I ignored it. She looked ridiculous in the end. I didn't care what she thought.

As has been said just say it's his name and sound positive and upbeat about it. Don't justify it or sound wobbly or others will pick up on it and question it too whereas they won't give it a thought negatively if you're not. It's a great name and importantly your choice.

It's nice to be original too. At school it's great to be the only one (or in a minority) with a name. Better than being in a class with lots of others with the same name. Ds loves his and we've had no teasingsmile

AnyFuckerWillDo Tue 29-Oct-13 19:30:38

Awww lily, I'm getting more and more used to it and hoping before long it'll just feel natural but I do worry everyone is secretly sniggering behind my back. My other names were Ben or George. Keep thinking of id of just chose something normal I wouldn't have all this worry. But on the other hand I'm sure I'd be kicking myself for not being braver...

Lilyve Tue 29-Oct-13 17:31:51

Sorry to jump on the band wagon late but had to post as I'm having the same weird wobble now! I called my little boy Ernest - Ernie for short and I keep thinking "what have I done?! Is this really cruel?" My mum and my dh's mum don't like it at all but I'm hoping it'll become normal after a while!

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 09:57:10

my mum never voiced an opinion before he was born, she knows it's my choice at the end of the day, and now he's born she says she loves it and that he is an Indiana grin

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 09:56:12

I massively wobbled before he was born, oh chose it as a tribute to a friend who has passed, and every time someone asked me if we had any names chosen I'd immediately try and justify it by saying 'there's a story behind it!!'

AnyFuckerWillDo Tue 29-Oct-13 04:47:44

Riot superb name. What did your parents say? Have you ever wobbled?

RiotBecky Tue 29-Oct-13 00:38:49

called my ds Indiana, it's uncommon enough for people to say it's unusual but well known enough for people to be able to spell it!! my nanna at first said she was going to call him Dan instead, and oh's mum nagged him before he was born to change it. I'm glad we stuck to it cos he is an Indiana now, he even suits Indy.

youaremychocolatecake Thu 17-Oct-13 00:04:33

You are never ever going to be able to please everyone. If you choose something ordinary like jack some people will think it's boring if you choose something wild like tinky winky ;) other people will think you're daft. What maters is that you like it. I don't even know where I plucked my sons name from. It's fairly ordinary and wasn't ticked off in any of my baby books but he just didn't look like any of the names I had in my head and after about 2 weeks of being nameless I just panic chose. This time I have names chosen already and he/we isn't here yet x

ElBombero Tue 15-Oct-13 23:15:07

That awful famzilla. I felt so so sad when they did this to me. How dare they? Not sure I will ever forgive hem for putting me through it to be honest, of course we'll move on but I'll never forget those comments and subsequent absence.

ElBombero Tue 15-Oct-13 23:11:52

Just got the Paul Simon song, lovely. He's actually of my dads favourite artists. Will have to mention it next time I see him, whenever that will be hmm

Famzilla Tue 15-Oct-13 22:40:18

I just don't get why people think it's ok to tell a new mum they don't like their new babies name. DD has a 'nice' name ( not top 50 but nothing special) and some of DP's family actually said they didn't like it and we're going to call her something different.

I just sat there with my mouth open for minutes before I could finally whimper "but that's not her name.. "

UniS Mon 14-Oct-13 23:05:46

I know an 8 year old sonny.

DismemberedDwerf Mon 14-Oct-13 22:34:55

Everytime I see the name Sonny I think of the Paul Simon song lyric: Sonny gets sunnier day by day by day I like it grin

dd1 has an unusual name, it's a non-standard spelling of an unusual name in itself. or a feminisation of a male name that's not common. (If you're curious pm me). I did have a wobble which is why it's not quite the name I'd picked out for her at birth (blame my mother for that). The original name meant 'my child'. This spelling changed it to 'harmony'. A joke, she'd have been more aptly named Hurricane!

But I liked it, and I cannot imagine her being called anything else.

bellamysbride Mon 14-Oct-13 22:21:37

My Mum really disliked out DS's name. It's pretty unusual but not chosen for that reason. She had the good grace not to mention it at the time. She now loves it. I felt quite self conscious about it initially as it felt a bit try hard. I don't feel that way at all now and I am so glad we used it. DD has a very lovely but dull name and I wish we had been a little more imaginative .

LadyintheRadiator Mon 14-Oct-13 07:55:06

Yes, it did affect our relationship, and it has been slow to recover but probably due to other issues too, or perhaps we weren't as close as I'd previously thought. But we are three years on now and I don't think about it at all, I'm not sure at what point it felt completely better iykwim.

Chunkamatic Mon 14-Oct-13 07:40:16

My DS2 is called Sonny. At 3.6 he is a happy, cheeky, vivacious little scamp!
Although I didn't have the problems with family you describe (they know better than to cross me!) I have had my share if wobbles over the name, mainly because of it being a nickname by origin.
My DS1 has a name which is rarer but I have felt more confident about from the start. Doesn't help now that we have moved from London to a small northern village where all the kids are called Charlie or Jack, my two really stick out!
DP on the other hand is less conscious of what others think and his conviction helps me realise that I should stand by mine. My DS's totally work their names and I'm quite sure I'm the only one who gives it that much thought!
Enjoy your little Sonny

Oriunda Mon 14-Oct-13 07:15:54

My son's name is loathed/thought pretentious or 'try hard' (whatever that means) by the mumsnet majority and loved by only a select few. I really don't care though. I love it (DH chose it, not me, as a fait accompli when DS was born) so don't give a monkey's what others think. DS totally rocks the name.

I think that's the difference between really loving a name or not. If you are bothered by people's reactions, maybe you don't love it enough.

Does Sonny have a mn that is more classic you'd be happy using? Have you already registered the name? If you are still not sure, then consider changing the name and having Sonny as a mn?

ElBombero Sun 13-Oct-13 21:54:24

Aw lady, sorry you've had I go through the same but glad I har someone to share my pain with. Did you relationship suffer? My dad said his name for the first time after a month of him being born.

LadyintheRadiator Sun 13-Oct-13 20:48:51

Oh how sad for you, Sonny is a lovely name. I named my DD Xanthe and my mum made no secret of the fact that she disapproved. She visited me after I'd had her in hospital and on seeing her cot label said in a flat voice, oh, you've called her Xanthe then. Not, congratulations, or anything. I was livid. She didn't use her name for a long time, just called her baby.

When DD was about 1 she apologised, of sorts, said she had come to love it and couldn't imagine her being called anything else. I am very glad that I (well, we) stuck to our guns.

fairylightsintheautumn Sun 13-Oct-13 19:39:03

the only problem I have is when the names are so odd that you don't remember them - an acquaintance of mine has a very unusually named daughter (something Gaelic,despite having no Gaelic heritage) and I just CANNOT remember it form one meeting to the next and after you've asked a couple of times it seems rude to ask again!

nkf Sun 13-Oct-13 15:36:22

People shouldn't comment. It's very rude. Always amazes me that people do.

ElBombero Sun 13-Oct-13 13:09:56

Yep peoples reactions. Wish I'd of sounded it out abit before hand then I would of been prepared.
It's ok, he's registered. He'll grow into his name and I'll learn to love it again because it's his.
Where people get off telling a very new mum they don't agree with her personal decisions I don't know. It hurt so bad at the time and really dented mine and my dads relationship.

nkf Sun 13-Oct-13 12:44:32

It sounds like a nickname to me, but if you like it. Why the wobble? People's reactions?

ihearttc Sun 13-Oct-13 12:41:32

I think its a fab name! My DS1 has a completely "normal" and dare I say boring name but I really don't like it. He is 8 now and it actually doesn't suit him at all.

However DS2 has an equally "normal" name but I love it and it really suits him!

Go with whatever you want to and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

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