Upset with FIL(8 Posts)
OK here it goes, DD's 5th Birthday today. OH is working as hes keeping his holidays for when the baby comes in August and we will need him here for Sept so I can settle DS in school. Well anyway as hes working the first time ever on her birthday. MIL very kindly offered to take me and the kids to jump to do something for DD's Birthday (I dont drive and cant get it there on normal transport). Well anyway, FIL turned up with MIL around 10.30, all ready to go and realise that FIL has brought 2 boaster seats (4years +), DS is 3 in July. Well anyway, I tried to explain that not only it was against the law for DS to ride in a boaster seat, but it was unsafe and also not comfortable for DS to ride on the seat. He kept saying comments like, 'Na he be fine, you can sit in the middle and hold him,' 'It was fine when my kids were young,' And argued with me that I was being silly well obviously I refused to take DS in the car, DD ended up crying and he quickly went back and got the other car seat from MIL's car to take the kids to Jump. Well anyway because of this incident, he was moody all day (which I was grateful that he had taken us there, I would have wanted a better atmosphere for my little girl). Well anyway we got there, (I dont know if anyone here as been to jump, but its this massive place, with lots of nocks and crannies, and has lots of huge sections for different ages). It was packed being a bank holiday. Obviously Dylan only being 2 and half, I followed him around like an hawk. Even with comments from FIL constantly, 'Let him be.. Come and sit down, leave him play he knows where we are, he'll find us when he wants something.' I didnt leave him be, I even pointed out to FIL that DS wanted to go in the 6years + part and how dangerous it was, there was this huge slide, which was vertical, and the children coming down it were around 8 years, I wouldnt even let DD go on it, And his reply was.... 'Aww we used to let ours go down them and they were even younger than Dylan, wooden ones too.' He kept snapping at the children saying you got to use authority and be harsh to get them to listen (even when they listen perfectly to me when I get down to their level and talk to them one on one). It just made me feel rotten. And I am grateful that they took us. but feel like its ruined DD's Birthday a little. Am I being hormonal, or silly
Hard to read that big paragraph, but if the question is your FIL a douche? The answer is yes.
All well and good that things were 'like that' when his kids were small. We know better now.
Why are the older generation so stubborn in their views?x
I feel for you sarah...my FIL is exactly the same...thinks he's the expert on EVERYTHING including bringing up my child.
Makes my blood boil...grrrr!!
He probably felt embarrassed and rejected when having done what he thought was the right thing re:seats in the morning.
Wouldn't worry. Just make sure he is properly thanked for taking you all and ignore the rest.
No, you're not being hormonal. Your FIL was a nob. Next time he does this, just look at him and smile and nod and think "everyone on MN thinks you're a nob too". You'll feel much better!
And you did the right thing putting your foot down about the car seat.
Not being hormonal. It is a shame that some of the older generation come out with the "well in my day it was fine" line and won't listen to anything else. In their day it was also fine to smoke as no-one knew that it caused lung cancer and heart disease. You were absolutely right to stick to your guns and don't change your parenting under pressure from relatives
who are talking a pile of crap anyway
I'm sorry that it spoiled the day for you, but I am sure that your little girl will still have had a great time - it takes a lot to knock down their excitement on birthdays and at play centres like that.
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