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Playing with your Kids

(40 Posts)
UglySister Fri 19-May-06 19:40:54

How much do you play with your kids? Am I the only one that thinks "playing" is the most dull thing in the world? It drives me insane amd I probably should do a lot more of it! Am I alone here? Isn´t this expaction that parents should play with their kids quite a recent thing?

Clayhead Fri 19-May-06 19:43:24

Play with them loads, personally I find it's as interesting as you make it.

My parents and grandparents played loads with me (1970s).

blueteddy Fri 19-May-06 19:53:40

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UglySister Fri 19-May-06 19:54:44

How old are they? Mine´s a pre-schooler.

Funny, my parents NEVER played with me, I was sent out to play with the other kids in the street so don´t have any concept of parents-kids playing together!

blueteddy Fri 19-May-06 19:56:04

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blueteddy Fri 19-May-06 19:57:37

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FairyMum Fri 19-May-06 19:57:54

I play lots. Like Clayhead, my parents played lots with me when I was a child in the 70s too. Personally, I think it's one of the most important things you can do with your child. Let them take the lead, make up the rules and just enter their world for a few hours.

UglySister Fri 19-May-06 20:00:06

Isn´t it good and important for kids to play on their own? I think they´re lucky just to have their own area, especially a garden to play in! I don´t htink I´m a bad mother but I do wonder if I should play more at home, rather than take her out so much..

Gem13 Fri 19-May-06 20:00:36

Mine didn't play with me.

I was into teaching teddies and dolls, then as soon as I could I read and read.

I find it difficult but am trying to do better.

handlemecarefully Fri 19-May-06 20:00:38

Uglysister - sadly I feel the same as you do - find it all a bit brain numbing. Would love to be a parent that can find some enjoyment from playing with my 2 pre-schoolers. My dd is constantly asking me to play with her and I feel trapped and cornered.

On the up side, I do enjoy reading to them, and doing some arts and crafts with them, plus going for walks and to the park / other outdoor activities

UglySister Fri 19-May-06 20:02:07

Phew, I am not alone!! Any tips on the arts and crafts Handlemecarefully?

Gem13 Fri 19-May-06 20:02:21

I was a child in the 70s but not a child of the 70s. My parents were in their early 40s when I was little (not so amazing now) and had 2 older children to supervise - homework, driving lessons, etc.

spidermama Fri 19-May-06 20:02:35

It seems to me that those who were played with by their parents are able to play with their kids.

My parents didn't play with me. I sometimes make myself play with my kids and I even enjoy it sometimes, but it doesn't come naturally or often.

Luckily dh is up there playing with them now. His mum played with him as a child.

blueteddy Fri 19-May-06 20:03:15

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Witchycat Fri 19-May-06 20:06:33

I can relate to what you are saying UglySister. I've found it goes in phases though. Used to love starting 'pretending' games with ds (shops, schools, tea parties etc..) & doing voices for his teddies and such but then he got so into it, wanting to do the same thing over & over that it drove me nuts.

Now he's nearly 5 and plays football with his Dad or things like Snakes & Ladders or jigsaws or construction kits with either of us. Have just taught him draughts as well. I can cope more easily with those sorts of games.

handlemecarefully Fri 19-May-06 20:08:13

Oh just general painting and sticking etc....

I have an Usborne book with suggestions of things to do in it which I have found invaluable "The Big Book of Things to Do" - it's fab. Got some things you can make together (with easy to follow idiot proof steps) in it, and includes baking and cooking suggestions. I'm happy with that sort of thing (I try to do one of these activities a couple of times per week)...but when dd suggests playing 'monsters' (chasing each other, growling etc) or hide and seek with the same hiding spot used every bloody time - well then I just feel like sticking my head in a bit vat of burning oil, i.e. boiling my head!

Incidentally, do you have a branch of 'The Works' near you? They sell a large cardboard house for £7.99 with lots of illustrations on the side which the lo's can colour in. Has kept dd busy for a good long while

PanicPants Fri 19-May-06 20:12:05

I LOVED playing games with my mum amd dad, I'd always ask to play a board game in the evening, or play act out a story, or in the summer play hide and seek.
I can't wait until ds is old enough for that sort of thing.

But atm he's only 8months and I find that playing is limited and I think he's happier to 'study' toys and boxes etc on his own. Sometimes I feel sooo guilty about not playing together, although he's always with me and I chatter away to him when I cooking or doing something for the house.

He does constantly look at me and smiles and laughs.

Clayhead Fri 19-May-06 20:26:24

PanicPants, mine are 2 and 4 now and we are in the board game stage, it's great, brings back loads of lovely memories for me. In fact, we even use some of the same games I played with my brother and parents as a child.

spidermama Fri 19-May-06 20:28:41

Board games and games like Charades, with proper structure and rules, are a different matter. It's the made-up, role play type stuff which I have difficulty opting into.

FairyMum Fri 19-May-06 20:32:39

It doesn't have to be stressful. I find I don't have to do much, just be part of their game. I spent about 6 months when DS1 was obsessed with transport being a passenger on a bus,plane,boat,rocket and I am often a patient in DD's hospital. I find that if I get carried away and start to "take over" the game, I am told off very firmly anyway.

Mala Fri 19-May-06 20:35:18

I'm glad I'm not alone. I find playing with my dd extremely boring(3 yr old). She's so into role play and I don't mind for really short spurts, but I get really weary after a while. My parents never played with me either. Dh does play more with her, but then again he does spend alot less time with her. I know it sounds awful, but the more I play with her, the more she expects it and I rather she learnt to play independently. I do feel awful about it, but it's the only way to keep my sanity.

Spatz Fri 19-May-06 20:37:08

I've also found it hard to play with them and felt guilty about it. I particularly dislike 'pretend' games.
As they've got older I really enjoy lego, board games and doing 'real' things like gardening.

Spatz Fri 19-May-06 20:38:37

I also think we're giving them a real gift by 'teaching' them to entertain themselves

FilyjonktheSnibbet Fri 19-May-06 20:52:58

yeah i'm crap at playing with them

think they do need to learn to play alone but that playing with them-their rules-is also good.

but their rules are effing tedious. i cannot enjoy driving a fecking train round and round a track, i just can't.

think its important to do something with them on their terms. eg with ds i often draw story for him, he tells the story and I draw it. that sort of thing.

failing that, going somewhere with alpha mums usually shames me into playing with them for a bit.

threebob Fri 19-May-06 20:59:54

I take ds out a lot, I use a hip seat and so I can talk to him about the stuff we see. It isn't playing but it is one on one time and we can do stuff we both like - going on the tram and eating in a cafe, going to the library and then paying in money in the bank -that sort of thing. I do cooking with him (cakes, but also just normal making a sandwich) and he sorts out the washing. I present these as play.

We play board games, hullaballo and playdough together, and we both read to him.

Dh handles playing at making Thomas Track, Lego and building blocks. I don't know if he enjoys it - but he does it so I've never asked.

My dad played a lot with me (and still thinks that ds needs 12 hours a day of entertaining), but my mum more got something out and then did some cooking or something.

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