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Parenting

how early did you potty train?

27 replies

lola88 · 05/05/2013 10:18

Ds is 15mo and has started to come tell me when he has done something in his nappy, I'm not bothered about potty training him until he is ready but I'm wondering how young is too young?

HV says he will not be ready before 2 but I've read about potty training at 18mo and I was trained at 18mo so if he is showing all the signs by then is it ok to go ahead and try? Also this new trend for training tiny babys is around which makes me wonder if some babies are ready before 2?

My mum bought him a potty yesterday to sit in the livingroom as this is what she done with me just sat it there told me it was for pee pee's and I started using it after a few months, my mums usually very good with baby tips so I'm happy to keep it she says to just leave it sitting and let him use it if he wants but my HV previously said starting before 2 just makes it a long process so does anyone have any experience with early training?

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bigbuttons · 05/05/2013 10:25

Some children show signs very early on indeed, as you have noticed with your own,they start to become aware.
You HV is wrong. It will only be a long drawn out process if you force the child before they are ready.
I have 6 dc's. the oldest was dry day and night by 18 months completely of his own accord. The others ranged from between 2 and 3. Sometimes I started too early and then left it to try again later.
In other cultures, for example in those in remote jungle regions say or in hot countries such as India children will most not be in 'nappies' as soon as they can walk and will be dry much earlier than in our type of culture where they are cocooned in a nappy where they can even feel if they are wet!
Just go with it. Your dc will let you know when he is ready!

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bigbuttons · 05/05/2013 10:29

Also remember before disposable nappies it was a huge chore to wash and dry cloth nappies. It was in the mothers' interest to get their dc's dry as soon as possible!
With a cloth nappy the child feels the wet immediately and it is uncomfortable; they are much quicker to make the link between what they feel in their bladder and what happens afterwards.
My eldest 2 were in cloth nappies and were dry much earlier than the 4 who were in disposables.

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lola88 · 05/05/2013 10:35

Thanks Buttons he's going through lots of nappies because he wants it off everytime he pee's! I'm just going to keep talking about it with him and let him do what he wants not so much train him as just let him learn at his own pace.

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Beatrixpotty · 05/05/2013 10:36

Waited until 2.7.Had a baby so left it as couldn't face loads of accidents but amazingly it only took 48hours.DS could talk properly then,I'm sure this made it easier.I did it with a sweet & a star for every wee on the potty and a bigger treat for a poo.

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saycheeeeeese · 05/05/2013 10:39

Can he tell ypu when he has the urge to go? Can he understand the concept of holding it until he gets to the potty/loo?

IMO it's pointless to potty train until they can do those things, I have an 18 mo and she is no where near ready for it. I won't be trying until she is able to communicate those things to me.

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BedHog · 05/05/2013 10:43

About 3, largely because my mum kept bleating on about it every time I spoke to her and it brought out the teenage rebel in me!

Will be starting DC2 a bit earlier, as soon as I see signs she's ready. The way I look at it is a child in nappies is easy, a fully potty trained child is easy, but a child in the process of potty training is a nightmare of constant washing, endless (often fruitless) trips to the toilet, big bags of spare clothes, having to be mindful of locations of public toilets, smelly wee-soaked shoes, ditto car seat, potette carrying, testicles resting on the germ infested rim of random public toilets as his legs aren't long enough, and that special warm feeling as a small child urinates onto the lap of your best trousers. I prefer to make that stage as short as possible so only start when I'm sure the child is capable.

According to my mother I was potty trained at 1. Even though I couldn't walk til I was 18 months old. Hmm

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StupidFlanders · 05/05/2013 11:05

He sounds ready if he's telling you he's wet. My first was completely toilet trained by 18 months, second by 2. My 19 month old shows no signs of being ready to start.

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lola88 · 05/05/2013 15:36

I'm not sure if he knows before hand but as he's peeing he tells me, he doesn't have words for it yet he only says about 20 words so far. He's only been telling me for a few days so I think he needs at least a couple of months before he will be ready to do any actual training but I can't see him getting another 9mo if he's showing the first signs already.

So far he has sat on the potty carried it around put it on his head and used it as a shoe so time will tell if he actually manages to pee in it :)

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Fuzzymum1 · 06/05/2013 20:01

My youngest started showing signs of being aware of his bodily functions around 15-18 months. At 21 months he refused to wear a nappy anymore and within a week or so was reliably dry in the day. The HV who did his two year check asked if he was aware when he was wet and nearly fell off her chair when I said he was wearing pants, LOL

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pointythings · 06/05/2013 20:11

I think if you keep listening to his cues, letting him get used to having the potty around and keeping it low key you will find it works very well.

I made the mistake of starting too early with DD1, first time mum/peer pressure thing. Two months later DD1 threw an almighty wobbly coming out of the paddling pool and refused a nappy. We talked to her about needing to use the potty/toilet and got on with it. She was dry and clean within a week, going to the big toilet independently.

With DD2 we waited for the nappy refusal and the same thing happened. It was no effort at all.

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amyboo · 07/05/2013 08:25

We potty trained DS1 at 2. He wasn't really "ready" per se, but where we live (Belgium) kids are generally potty trained at 2 so that they're dry for starting maternelle (pre school) at age 2.5. Although he wasn't showing that much interest in it before we started, he picked it up very quickly (partly because all his friends at creche were also doing it). And he was completely dry in daytime (even for his nap) by 2.2.

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Shattereddreams · 07/05/2013 08:33

Both DD and DS were dry at 2 exactly, I know because we were on holiday both times.

DS was easier he just got it, probably watching all of us use toilet. DD was pliable to the process with stickers but much more stubborn than her brother Grin

One warning, it's hard to find small enough pants under 2. Even thought the label says18m they practically fit me ! Primark.

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Shattereddreams · 07/05/2013 08:35

I too had the HV fall off the chair that both were dry. That was 2yr 8m
Makes me think the average age is nearer 3

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mindingalongtime · 07/05/2013 10:43

I have a 20 month old in my care, she is dry and clean, reliably so and uses the toilet. I have two 2.8 month olds, who I'd love to toilet train, but unfortunately I don"t have the parents support.-They say "Oh we'll wait until they are three!

They want to use the toilet as they see the younger one doing so and wearing pretty knickers with fairies on, so the do tend to run around here without anything on and use the potty quite often, then `I have to put them in a nappy to send them home Confused I have forgotten and sent them home in knickers and had funny comments the next day!

I get most of my minded children dry by 2 years old, not so easy if they are part time, so I don't think it is too early. My own 2 were dry day and night well before 2.

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Cloverer · 07/05/2013 10:49

Go for it.

Fashions change, currently people like to wait til 2.5-3ish, it used to be 18 months-2ish.

Personally, I trained DS at 2.1. He wasn't showing loads of signs of being ready (I think when people say this they often mean have basically trained themselves Grin) but he got it really quickly and was sorted day and night by 2.3 years.

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EskSmith · 07/05/2013 10:56

Dd1 was trained easily at 21 months. Dd2 fully trained at 3.10. All children are different, sounds like it would be worth trying with ops child to me.

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NightLark · 07/05/2013 11:02

DD is 22 months and has been showing signs of being ready. She loves to play 'sit on the potty' and pretends to wee and poo. She's had a couple of successful poos on the potty and loo, and knows when she needs to go. I'll train her once the weather gets decent and she can go pants-free for a while.

Her older sibs trained between 2 and 2.6.

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choceyes · 07/05/2013 11:05

My DS wasn't ready before 3yrs (and he was in cloth nappies!). I started training him at 3yrs and we got wees very quickly, but poos took a while longer. I think he was about 3.4yrs before he was consistently going to the toilet for a poo. He was dry at night shortly after that too, and has never wet the bed since.

I have just trained DD, of 2.7yrs. She got it in 2 days. Both days were in nursery, so they handled the accidents and after that no accidents at all, so I personally has never had an accident with DD Smile. I was happy to wait till she was 3 like her brother, but she was showing signs of being ready, but I was waiting till the weather was better. She is also now dry at night!

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choceyes · 07/05/2013 11:09

I think closer to 3 is about average tbh. When DS didn't train till 3yrs, his nursery said this was quite normal and some 3yr olds are out of nappies and some aren't. I think the majority train btw 2.5-3.5yrs, from what I gathered from nursery and friends of mine.

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Cloverer · 07/05/2013 12:14

From working in nurseries I would say the 2.5ish is average, most girls are trained around then, boys between 2.5-3. The number of children not trained til after 3 are about equal to those trained before/at 2 I would say.

Of around 80 nursery class children each year (term after their 3rd birthday) I would say less than 5 are still in nappies when they start.

I wonder if it is a bit of a cultural thing though? I worked in some predominantly working class nurseries with lots of immigrants, and most people seem to train at or shortly after 2. Delaying training seems more common in middle class parents - maybe because they are more likely to have two full time working parents?

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MirandaWest · 07/05/2013 12:16

DS was ready at about 2 but I out him off until 2.2 as DD was very small then and I wanted to be able to give it my full attention.

DD was 19 months when she decided she wasn't going to wear a nappy again Hmm. If I were to do it again I would do more to hold her off until 2 - her language wasn't really up to it and I had to help with clothes a lot more. I think between 2 and 2.5 is better.

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ShowOfHands · 07/05/2013 12:25

DD was 17 months. DS is 20 months and is just starting to train. No accidents yet and we're on day 2. I started when they began to tell me they needed the toilet.

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matana · 07/05/2013 16:50

DS is 2.5 and not ready imo. He has shown some signs and began telling us a couple of months ago when he'd done a poo. Sometimes he had, sometimes it was just a wee and now he's back to not telling us and doesn't seem bothered by having a dirty nappy. While the weather has been warm i've let him wander around with his nappy off a bit and had a potty nearby, but he won't sit still on a potty for longer than 10 secs. He now knows the right words, but isn't capable of telling us before it happens, only afterwards (sometimes). Additionally, his poos are mostly not well formed (and feel like they never will be!) I'm going away on holiday in June and will probably wait until i get back before seeing again if he's ready. I don't want to push him if he's not ready. He's the kind of little boy who does exactly what's expected providing he's ready for it. It was the same moving him to his toddler bed - had no troubles whatsoever. He was just ready.

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choceyes · 07/05/2013 22:52

cloverer that is interesting because my dcs nursery is our work based nursery so parents are professional middle class types, and like I said there are quite a few kids not properly out of nappies by 3yrs.

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vladthedisorganised · 08/05/2013 10:06

The tiny baby thing is slightly different - you respond to cues but the baby can't (by definition) hold on for long, so it isn't 'training' as such. I used the potty with DD from about 5 months and it worked well for us. Not something that I would be brave enough to do full-time though, and I can see how it might not work for everyone (or for every child - just happened to with this one)

It did mean that when we did potty training seriously (meaning that she would take herself to the potty rather than me bringing her) at 2, it was very straightforward as I didn't have to go through the 'what is the potty for' stage. I don't think there is a magic age, but it helps if they're mobile enough to manage taking pants/ trousers down and verbal enough to tell you when they need to go.

When DD was tiny I knew what facial expression meant she'd need to go fairly soon, but I wouldn't expect everyone else to make the connection.

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