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sleep training 5 half month old!

(18 Posts)
kirdy Fri 03-May-13 08:24:15

Want to try and sleep train my daughter as she will only fall to sleep in my arms being rocked she has never fallen to sleep on her own and is always in bed with me because as soon as I try put her in her cot she screams and screams. I have tried putting her in get cot when she is sleepy and laying next to her on my bed holding her hand to try calm her but she screams the whole time. Was thinking about the ferber method as this worked with my son but he was 1 when we did that with him and not so clingy. Just want advice on if this is the best way to go as i can't keep standing and rocking her for ever. X

valiumredhead Fri 03-May-13 09:08:12

You won't be doing it for ever - if rocking works then carry on! All babies need something be it a dummy, or music or feeding to sleep or rocking, that's just babies for you.

I wouldn't do the Ferber method with a child under 1 personally, I did use it with my much older child with good results but 5.5 months is still a very small baby.

Forgetfulmog Fri 03-May-13 09:16:56

The general guideline is that you shouldn't sleep train a baby until they're at least 6 mo so yours is still a little too young. We're going to try to sleep train ours when she is 8 mo (currently 7) & are going to use the No Cry Sleep Solution.

Kubalai Fri 03-May-13 09:26:45

It won't be forever - she is tiny still, a tiny baby who isn't crying to punish or upset or manipulate you. She is communicating her need to feel safe, and close to you. I know how hard those early months are, but get help and support for you to support her iyswim. This too shall pass.

Wowserz129 Fri 03-May-13 09:28:35

Oh for god sake OP. your baby is 5 months old what do you expect when you have a baby! Just leave a baby of a few weeks to scream or something why don't you, that ought to do the trick sad

kirdy Fri 03-May-13 09:36:34

I did think she may be a little young for it. I just don't want her to have to need rocking to sleep forever. Because my son was the same until we sleep trained him at one. I just don't have the energy to stand up bouncing and swaying her for up to 45 mins and that's during the day to. And she will not fall to sleep for her dad it has to be me so he can't help although he has tried to but we just end up with a frustrated daddy and a screaming totally worked up baby :-(

kirdy Fri 03-May-13 09:39:08

I wasn't planning on leaving her all night to scream and scream but as I said even me laying next to her holding her hand and rubbing her face talking calmly and even singing does not work.

Forgetfulmog Fri 03-May-13 09:44:23

Errr I don't think there was any need for that Wowzerz

GrandPoohBah Fri 03-May-13 09:49:01

Have a look at the No Cry Sleep Solution - it's a lot less harsh than Ferber, and it teaches positive sleep associations. It's not an instant fix, but I know a few people who have had good results with it.

kirdy Fri 03-May-13 10:01:37

Thanks will have a look xx

shaynale Sun 05-May-13 19:14:04

There is no right or wrong here. I did sleep train at 5 months because like you I was rocking/bouncing for 45 + mins multiple times during the night and day. I lay him down, went in after 2 mins, then, five and at ten, he was asleep. It was almost a if he was 'asking' me to teach him how to do this. When I was rocking, he was crying anyway, so ten mins of crying was far less and in my opinion more gentle on him. I wasn't asking him to sleep through, just to be able to go back without a cardiovascular workout in the middle of the night and during naps. It saved both of us. I don't think it's right for everyone or every baby, but it was right for mine and by 7 months he was sleeping through.

CreatureRetorts Sun 05-May-13 19:34:44

Give it another month and try settling her again on her front or side of you're not happy doing that then roll her onto her back. My dd started self settling from 6 months or so. Any earlier and I was fighting a losing battle. She has phases where she won't self settle (17 m

CreatureRetorts Sun 05-May-13 19:37:01

Sorry hit post too soon! Meant to say she's 17 months now and self settles like a dream.

Unlike my ds - we kept trying but just didn't get anywhere. Should've let him do it naturally (he's 3)

girliefriend Sun 05-May-13 19:45:12

Hi op, totally unnecessary Wowzer.

I started helping my dd to self settle at this age.

I would have a really structured bedtime routine in place, ensure she is clean, warm and well fed and then do a little bit of rocking until she is sleepy but not asleep and then pop her down.

When/if she cries stand near by and reassure if she gets hysterical pick up and repeat and then put down again. This will feel like it goes on forever but should eventually work!!

Fwiw there is no way I would be rocking a baby for 45 mins every evening as I just don't have the patience or back for it!!

Will she take a dummy?

CoteDAzur Sun 05-May-13 19:52:03

We sleep trained DD at 4 months and DS at 5 months. It is possible, and normally takes only a few nights.

Put him down for the night, then go in at increasing intervals to pat/shh him, sing to him, etc until he goes to sleep. Expect the first night to be pretty rough, but second night should be better. DD slept through on the 3rd night.

tinybitmad Mon 20-May-13 13:18:19

how do you feel as an adult if you cry yourself to sleep does it make you feel warm and loved?

PleaseLetsGoToSleep Mon 20-May-13 13:42:57

Agree with Creature, I used to lie my ds down on his front at about this age and he would usually go to sleep with no problems, with a bit of back patting as well, then turn him over when he was asleep.
Even if you do sleep train op you're very likely to have to repeat the process after illness, sleep regression, teething etc. I agree that you need to phase out the rocking to sleep if you can. My ds went through a very bad period regarding sleep at 6\7 months, I used to lie down with him holding him in a bear hug against me so he couldn't struggle until he fell asleep. He used to cry and try to break free but he always fell asleep. It was a form of cc I guess but I was always there with him. He's 18 months now and brilliant at putting himself to sleep.

oscarwilde Mon 20-May-13 15:14:27

Have you tried popping her in her cot when it's not bedtime? With a few toys, the curtains open etc so she is used to the space and is familar with her surroundings? I did this for a bit with DD1, pottered around the room tidying etc and popping in and out. At 5.5 months she should be happy to wave her legs in the air and gnaw on a toy for 10 mins or so.

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