Advice needed please, to cut a long story short, my H and I are separated and living apart, we have three dc's, dd aged 12 , ds1 aged 10 and ds2 aged 7. H has 3 bedroomed house and not coping financially so has decided to move a male lodger aged mid 40's in. Our children stay there one day and one night a week. This lodger is someone he works with and doesn't know very well. My concerns are for the safety of the children with this man around, can I request a crb check or similar? I am tempted to tell my h that the children won't be staying overnight when the lodger is there.
Have been in this situation with my 2 year old. You have no right to stop contact over it - I was advised of this despite my child being so young. You could request a CRB check but no one has a legal obligation to provide one. Sorry it's not what you wanted to hear.
Perhaps I am over reacting, I don't want to assume that every person is a threat to my children and I have also considered that I will worry when my husband meets someone else and that even though she will be female she could also pose a threat. I am going to request to meet him, I don't intend to interrogate him but at least that may alleviate some of my concerns.
I wasn't intending to tell my children to stay clear because he might be a paedophile, just to be aware, that's all. I should add that the h is not the most trustworthy person, having been caught stealing, had an affair and being physically abusive towards me when were together however he is not a terrible father, selfish and a bit stupid perhaps
I am genuinely not looking to stop access, he has seen them every weekend since we split last June and is taking them on holiday in May. I think I needed to get some perspective and you have certainly given me that! It won't stop me worrying though
Ummm sorry but demanding to meet lodger or possible future partners will make you sound like a crazy person. You obviously trusted your ex enough to have children with him. Now you have to trust him to look after your children when you are not around. You have no rights to stop contact and should not barring actual risk of danger. And I do mean actual difference of opinion over parenting is not one of them.