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I'm feeling like a shit mum this morning :(

(10 Posts)
honeytea Tue 16-Apr-13 08:19:02

I'm having a really bad morning sad Ds is 4 months old and 99% of the time evrything is lovely and I feel like I do a good job with him.

Last night he woke every 2-3 hours, it wasn't the worst sleep I got around 6 hours of broken sleep. normally I bring ds into bed with me at 6 when dp goes to work but today ds just wanted to be awake and playing/chatting. I just couldn't cope with being a chatty mum. I let him just lie next to me and shout/cry, I had fed him he was just bored. After about 15 mins of on/off shout/crying we got up and i went in the shower, I usually put ds on the floor and sing whilst I'm in the shower and he is happy but there was no singing this morning and more shouting from ds.

I then fed him whilst sitting on the sofa and he went to sleep so I carried him to the bedroom and put him in bed with me, he woke up and wanted to play/chat again, then I cried sad I felt so bad, it isn't ds's fault. I picked him up and he cuddled me (well rested his head on my shoulder I tell myself it is cuddling)

He is playing under his babygym now whilst I watch crap tv and mumsnet.

Usually our mornings are lovely, I just feel like such a bad mum today. I resent my DP because he sleeps all night (he drives as a job so he needs to sleep) I wonder if my period is coming back and I have pmt.

Any tips on how I can cope pull myself together on mornings like this? I feel like I am damaging my baby sad

We are going for a walk with a friend and then to baby singing at 12 but it is only 9 now and everything seems to have already gone wrong sad

Droflove Tue 16-Apr-13 08:28:47

The truth is that you don't have to 'pull yourself together', you are obviously an amazing mum and having the odd bad day where you don't give 100% and only manage 80% (which seems about what you did on your off day) is normal and no harm for your baby. As long as you are not depressed and tomorrow or the next day is back to your usual energetic self then just revel in the low motivation days and take yourself and baby off to bed for extra napssmile

primigravida Tue 16-Apr-13 08:29:49

We all have days like this. Sleep deprivation starts to catch up with you at this point. Your baby will be fine. You need to try and get some rest when you can. Have naps on the weekend and sleep-ins then when your DH is around. Try rotating his toys around or using a baby carrier to get on with things if he is bored but you need some downtime but baby is bored. Is there anyone who can give you a break during the week? A friend of mine and I used to take turns to look after both of our babies.

Hanginggardenofboobylon Tue 16-Apr-13 08:31:03

Google 4 month sleep regression, you are a great mum coping with another of those trying times that will pass, be kind to yourself

GingerPCatt Tue 16-Apr-13 08:33:47

You are NOT a shit mum! Your baby is fed and cuddled and just because you're not feeling the joys of spring he is fine. You're exhausted- give yourself a break and rest if you can. Mornings with my DS are ceebies until my second cup of tea about 8:30ish. I don't interact much until I've woken up a bit. As long as your DS is in a safe place it's fine to let him entertain himself or have a whinge or whatever.

honeytea Tue 16-Apr-13 08:56:03

Your all really kind thank you.

Ds is now asleep, he is on the sofa so I can't catch up on any sleep myself as I can't leave him and I think if I move him he will wake up, but I have a cup of coffee so I am gpoing to relax and enjoy that.

My dp does look after ds at the weekends but this weekend he had a really bad back so he wasn't as much help as usual.

I feel so weepy I think it must be something hormonal, maybe it is time for my period to return, I was hoping for a few more months period free!

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Tue 16-Apr-13 08:59:25

Were you always sparkling before you met DP, were you never slightly jaded before you had DS?

You probably had off days like the rest of us.

Now you have a 4 month old and still function on reduced sleep and do stuff, go out and see people, what's not to like! I bet you are DP's and certainly your baby's world, I know winter seems never ending sometimes but get what you can out of the day. Start up slowly, or crash out later, whichever pattern suits you. Pace yourself and DS, you get to choose. Fresh air at least once a day even if it's just a walk round the block does help clear the fug. If your friend has a DC she will probably empathise so don't feel you have to put on a show of Wonder Mum.

almostanotherday Tue 16-Apr-13 09:11:26

Don't be hard on yourself, every parent has a day like yours but you have plenty of time to turn the day around smile

scarredpierced Tue 16-Apr-13 10:56:48

You are NOT a shit mum. Your baby is warm, fed, sleeping and has lovely plans for rest of day. I would still go to the singing and for the walk, the fresh air will do you both the world of good smile

honeytea Tue 16-Apr-13 17:06:38

Thanks so much, the day got much better ds was especially giggly and cuddly smile

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