DS has just turned 3. Most of the time he's pretty well behaved and happy to communicate with people, but occasionally he can be very grumpy and it can be embarrassing.
Today I did some shopping in a supermarket, while he slept in the pushchair. When he woke up, I took him to the toilets - he was in a grump and didn't want to go (even though it was clear he needed to). In the toilets, after much fuss and jollying along by me, he eventually the job got done, although then started crying about having to wash his hands. A nice woman had overheard the fuss and said to him what a lovely, big boy he was to wash his hands. DS promptly growls/sobs "Go away!" at her. She was lovely about it, but of course I immediately told him that it wasn't nice to talk to her like that, and apologised to her on his behalf.
I then asked him to apologise to the woman himself. I've done this once before when he was rude to an elderly lady cooing over him, and that time he did so. This time he was being stubborn, but after a while, he did eventually say 'sorry' quietly and sulkily. He then cheered up a little and said 'bye bye' to her.
I feel like it's the right thing for him to learn that he must say sorry when he is rude or has hurt/upset somebody, but I'm also worried I'm going to turn this into a battle of wills that I'll inevitably lose in situations like this (where we have a limited amount of time to extract an apology!)
He can be like this at home as well. When he accidently hurts me (e.g. he drops a toy car on my foot and I yell out 'ow!'), he immediately yells "Don't say that!" When I explain that I'm hurt and that the nice thing to do would be to say sorry, he'll respond haughtily, "I don't have anything to say." Usually he does relent and say "Sorry Mummy; it was only an accident - I didn't do it on purpose", but the time it takes to do this is getting longer and longer. I want to prepare him for preschool in September, so I think he needs to learn to say sorry without it being a battle. But am I making it one by making a big deal out of it?
Any thoughts/suggestions?
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Parenting
3 year old very reluctant to say 'sorry'
6 replies
Kalypso · 01/04/2013 22:47
OP posts:
ArteggsMonkey ·
01/04/2013 23:10
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