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DS Wants To Go To An All Boys School

(5 Posts)
mumof5boys13 Tue 19-Feb-13 23:11:16

Hi everyone. My 10 year old son Riley will be starting at secondary school in September. My eldest son Luke is 13 and already at secondary school, he goes to a very good mixed gender school where he has a healthy mix of both boy and girl friends which i think is good. Now my choice really would be to send Riley there as well but he has been telling me he wants to go to a nearby all boys school, he seems quite adament he wants to go there. This particular school has had a bad reputation in the past and was at one time on special measures. I think it has improved a lot in the past couple of years though. The thing is Riley already says to me he hates most of the girls at school and all his friends are boys, so i worry if i let him go to an all boys school he will not be around girls enough to form a better relationship with them like Luke has. I worry that it will be too rough at an all boys. He is already in trouble a lot at school and plays up at home too. I don't want to be the type of mother who won't let her child make any of his own choices but at the sametime my feeling is that i'd prefer he went to the same school as Luke. Any thoughts? Am i being silly worrying about this?

lolalotta Wed 20-Feb-13 06:37:42

My DP went to an all boys school and hated it. He had a brother also, no sisters and got to uni not really knowing how to relate to girls, I would send him to a mixed if I were you! I am sure if he were a bit older he would make a different decision!

Pagwatch Wed 20-Feb-13 07:03:13

My son asked to go to a boys school having been at a mixed school until he was 11. He had been at a boys school and a mixed school and he much preferred the boys school.
He was quite able to understand what he wanted and it was the right choice for him. Many boys in boys school have an element of choice - not all of them would chose mixed

He was very happy and he loved it.

I can't quite believe that the 'don't know how to relate to girls' thing is still trotted out.
His friends had sisters that he made friends with. The school mixed some classes/events with local girls schools. They all started meeting up at parties by about 13. They also started interacting on Facebook etc in their teens. He has as many close female friends as male. Now, at uni he has 5 female flat mates, two male flat mates and has had plenty of dates and girlfriends.
Dh went to a boys school. No problem relating to girls.

I think maybe there was more potential for boys to be isolated years ago before schools worked on links with girls schools and before the Internet formed such a significant role in forging relationship groups or teenagers, but I think it would be odd for it to still be a problem. I suspect boys reaching adulthood now who have difficulty relating to girls would probably have the same problem in a lass room full of them.

I can't speak for all schools but no, it wasn't anymore rough than any other environment but then the school was strong on discipline and if he played up he would be in a lot of trouble.

See what the options are. Then, if I were you, I would go and have a look. An enormous amount depends on the individual school.

lolalotta Wed 20-Feb-13 15:53:20

It was 14 years ago now that my DP started secondary school so I can appreciate that things may have changed since then, I just wanted to tell OP what my DP made to it all, I know he heartily wished he had gone to a mixed school that is all. I agree that with FB etc it will be easier to make connections these days! I don't think any of DP's close friends had sisters and the school made no efforts to connect with the local girls school.

MiaowTheCat Wed 20-Feb-13 20:14:44

My brother loved his all boys school and as for not relating to girls - he tends to be beating the women off with a stick if his facebook (and old mobile phone he gave me) are anything to go by!

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