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(32 Posts)
stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 21:21:09

Please will someone tell me that their stubborn, argumentative, attention seeking, messy 7yr dd turned into a lovely, pleasing, organised and compliant teenager/adult.
I love my dd but SHE DRIVES ME MAD!!!!

stopsayingmum Fri 18-Jan-13 14:00:35

There is hope then. Grandad calls dd ASBO. I think he is only half joking.

Arcticwaffle Fri 18-Jan-13 13:28:56

I have 3 pre-teen dds. The feistiest by far as a small child, dd2, was really very hard work as a baby, toddler, and small child. At 7 we got comments like "Well, at least she won't be needing assertiveness training", and "She gets worse every day!". Or from my mother after looking after the dds for a day, she offered to have "1 or two of them to visit in the holidays, not including dd2".

But now at 11 she really is massively more compliant and agreeable. The occasional strop or yelling fit, but much much rarer, and followed by apologies. She's delightful now. So some of them certainly do get calmer with age.

And meanwhile my dd3, who was an easygoing baby, is a stubborn, argumentative, attention seeking 8yo....

But dd1 has been easy from birth, she's nearly 13 now. Laid back and calm.

None of them are tidy though and none is too hot on washing or grooming.

stopsayingmum Fri 18-Jan-13 13:04:56

Well done Andro. I live in hope dd turns out like you. Good to hear. thanks

Andro Fri 18-Jan-13 12:23:38

Ugh, I've also had no sleep and my typing is showing that!

Andro Fri 18-Jan-13 12:23:01


Andro Fri 18-Jan-13 12:22:50

stopsayingmum * Portofino*

I have post grad qualifications from 3 top clas universities, an executive jo, a wonderful DH and 2 amazing adopted children (DS ans DD). I've been very fortunate! I have also (eventually) managed to have a really good relationship with my Mother (my relationship with my father was never in question, I was the ultimate 'daddy's girl').

CatPussRoastingOnAnOpenFire Fri 18-Jan-13 08:16:58

My dd has always been a little sod! I love her to pieces, but she has been trouble since the day she was born. As a little one, she used to sleep for hours, but when she was awake, boy did you know it! She was always into mischief, always in A&E and always where she shouldn't be. And she's an opinionated little rat!

stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 23:09:50

Ooohhhh the singing - yes the constant singing!

I am dreading the hormone changes.

I have the wine. wine

Tigerbomb Thu 17-Jan-13 23:04:09

Mine was like that - eye rolling, attention seeking, stubborn, opinionated, always right, willful etc but five minutes later she would be the most loving, funny, kind child you could ever meet.

Sometimes she was such hard work. She got worse in her teenage years and we had many a spat. She is now 23 and can still be a mare at times but she mellowed out and we now have a fantastic relationship.

Apparently I was the same and my mother often told me that she hoped I got a daughter just like me and I found myself repeating it to my daughter.

Follyfoot Thu 17-Jan-13 22:58:20

I think the willful ones remain willful, and some of the docile ones probably become willful too.

diplodocus Thu 17-Jan-13 22:51:33

But are the teenage girls who are a nightmare the same ones who are willful when younger, or is it the turn of their more docile counterparts, that's what I need to know. You've all described my DD exactly, and I keep wondering when it's going to get better.

CatPussRoastingOnAnOpenFire Thu 17-Jan-13 22:46:21

Ha! Hang on to your hat, I've got news for you and you aren't going to like it....
It gets WORSE! Teenage girls are fairly horrid! Sorry!

Follyfoot Thu 17-Jan-13 22:44:46

My DD was all of those things at 7 stopsayingmum. And 8...and 9. In fact she was about 17 1/2 before she suddenly turned into this thoughtful, wise kind girl.

She still loses everything though and its never her fault

wigglesrock Thu 17-Jan-13 22:40:08

Mine is an eyeroller (she may get it from me blush), she also is very scatty (from her Father). She is very tidy, she likes to have all her CDs in a nice pile so she can learn all the words and sing them all the time!

She is also the oldest of my 3 daughters (7,5 and 23 months) - who has the wine? grin

stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 22:30:23


stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 22:30:08

Andro - and have you turned out ok? Not in prison I presume!!!

Portofino Thu 17-Jan-13 22:28:36

Do you have a dd, Andro?

Andro Thu 17-Jan-13 22:21:16

I can tell you what I was like:

Stubborn - I was and have remained so, I just learned to channel it more appropriately.
Argumentative - I still love a good debate/discussion but in time I also figured out where the line between debate and argument was (I was about 12 when that happened).
Attention seeking - This I have never been, the only time I felt like going down that route I knew it was futile.
Messy - I was shocking until I went to secondary school.

I was never deliberately rude though.

stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 21:47:52

For real effect I take sweets out of her sweetie bag. That hurts.

Portofino Thu 17-Jan-13 21:44:18

Definitely wine! And like I said, you need to do/stop something to focus their attention. CONSEQUENCES.

stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 21:38:33

Portofino you SO understand!

Well, if wine is what is recommended..........

Hanikam Thu 17-Jan-13 21:38:06

Found DDs homework outside the front door. She stopped to say goodbye to the cat on the way to school, and put her book down.....then went without it!
And before Christmas she lost her school shoes.

Portofino Thu 17-Jan-13 21:36:36

And she probably DOES care that she lost her present - but won't let on about it. As then blame could be attributed......I think it does them good to learn that not caring for your stuff has consequences....

Portofino Thu 17-Jan-13 21:34:08

And HA at the excuses! It is never "their" fault. I tell myself, after wine, that girls like this will go far! They will take no shit, will be masters of their destiny. I LIKE that. Tis bloody annoying though.

stopsayingmum Thu 17-Jan-13 21:33:44

Well yes, later on in life being strong willed will be a good thing. Aint no-one going to mess with her when she's the boss of her own company!

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