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how would u sleep train an almost 12 month old?

(8 Posts)
lola88 Mon 14-Jan-13 08:19:16

I need ideas and options on sleep training ds is almost 12 months and can wake anything between 2-7 times a night, last week he was waking at 12 2 4 6 and up for the day at half 7 last night was 12 3 6 and 7.30 for the day.

We currently co sleep half the night when I'm so tired I don't care anymore and it doesn't help apart from the fact I don't have to get out my bed. I'm sure it's just habbit and expecting a bottle to put him back to sleep, last night I tried just offering water which worked to a point but after 30 mins of rolling about my arms tryin to get back to sleep I gave up and gave him milk.

I know half the problem is I'm offering the milk and keeping the cycle going but I'm just to tired to fight. The plan so far is my mum will watch him one night so we can sleep then dp will take a week off to help.

So can anyone tell me what worked for them? I don't know what route to take for this. Thanks

valiumredhead Mon 14-Jan-13 08:52:19

Ime if you keep offering milk in the night the child will wake and not settle itself back to sleep. I kept waiting for my ds to stop needing milk in the night and I waited until he was 2.5 then realised that I should just offer water. It took 3 nights and he slept through from then on.

If I had my time again I would do it much earlier BUT 12 months is still very little so if I had my time again I would leave it until 14 -15 months so I knew for sure he was having enough to eat during the day.

Good luck smile

valiumredhead Mon 14-Jan-13 08:53:40

I've just re read your post about waking 7x in the night - drop the milk! What time are you putting him down at night?

lola88 Mon 14-Jan-13 09:14:16

He goes to sleep between 7 and 8 and will wake between 7 and 8 unless we have a very bad night then he might have an extra hour, I don't think he needs the milk he's a great eater during the day and sometimes will go til 4am before waking but other times wake at 11 wanting a bottle so I'm sure it's just habbit. He doesn't wake full of beans wanting to play he wakes grumpy and tired wantin to go back to sleep and will settle with milk in mins.

I did try watering down his bottles to get him off and his sleep was getting much better but he then got a tummy bug so it was all off and I've not found the energy to start over, that was 3 months ago so don't know if I should try that or just water. I've just been hoping he improves with age but he's not. I'm back at work in 2 weeks I need to sort it out asap

valiumredhead Mon 14-Jan-13 09:21:16

Personally I would stop the milk then - it sounds like a habit and tbh wouldn't we all like a hot drink in the middle of the night rather than be told to go back to sleep wink

Water in a sippy cup - not a bottle or that might really confuse/annoy him!

AmericasTorturedBrow Mon 14-Jan-13 09:22:53

I'm mid sleep training my 13month old, after several botched attempts along the way before now. Over the last two months I've gradually got rid of milk at night, stopped bringing her into bed and worked on putting her down drowsy rather than solidly asleep. It's taken a while because a year of no sleep really does you in, doesn't it?

Now I'm doing a version of CC. At bedtime I sing "speed Bonney boat" to her as I put her down. If she stands and starts shouting I go straight in, hum the same tune and lie her down. At night, when she wakes I pick her up, cuddle her while humming the same tune, put her down after one verse awake, leave the room, wait one minute, go in humming the same tune, lay her down without her picking her up, leave. Wait one minute and repeat. Did this first two nights, next two nights made it two minutes between going in, then the fifth night made it three, though she only woke once that night and settled after I first went in.

We're getting there, she wakes in the night still and cries out but doesn't stand up and has resettled herself before I've even really registered she's woken up. Last night (night 7) she woke screaming and had a raspy throat and was snotty so I gave her a bit of watered down milk to help her throat and cuddled her a but longer than usual, but still put her down not quite asleep. She cried out when I put her own but resettled.

There are so many ways of sleep training and I've tried a few over DDs short lifetime but I think before now she wasn't ready and I was too exhausted. The long winded sitting in hr room doing gradual withdrawal made me drowsy and more tired and less able to cope, hence oing a fairly mild version of CC

Good luck, it's awful having sleep deprivation for so long!

valiumredhead Mon 14-Jan-13 09:27:43

Oh I love Speed Bonny boat smile

Fairylea Mon 14-Jan-13 09:35:53

Consistency is key.

No milk during the night, no co sleeping unless you are going to consistently co sleep - I know it's hard but if you "give in" and bring dc in bed with you they will keep waking up thinking this might be the time they get to your bed !

No talking during the night, put to bed after a warm milk drink preferably given next to their bed, in a very dark room, say good night and stroke their head and walk out. If they don't settle within 10 mins (a few if crying) go back and stroke head, resettle and walk out again, repeat. When they wake in the night offer water, don't talk, don't pick them up at all, don't change them, pat stroke head and walk out.

If they were really crying the house down I would offer milk and resettle but water down the milk and aim to phase out otherwise you could end up with them getting the majority of their calories during the night.

And never bring them in bed with you unless that's where you want them to sleep!

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