Wasting good food!(12 Posts)
Anyone else have kids that craze for something for lunch/dinner/snack etc and then not eat it? Ask me to make something eg soup and then say there's something wrong with it and not eat it? Am going mad here.
Is it a control thing? They have no appreciation of the waste of the food or the money it cost to buy. They don't care that they are lucky to have a nice home and parents that look after them. They seem to think its ok to take a bit out of a buttered piece of toast and then say 'I don't want it'.
Where the hell am I going wrong? What do you do with wasteful little ingrates? I am fed up of wasting good food. The birds on the garden do bloody well out of us. And the dog.
Are there any that don't? My dd fortunately not old enough yet to choose but my mum looks after 4 of her grandchildren (ages 18m to 6) and whenever I go over there are plates and plates of leftover food as they all want something different and none of them eat it (apart from the youngest who eats anything). They really miss their dog who died earlier in the year as they just used to give her the leftovers! Tbh, they should keep pigs.
As for stopping them, I'd be tempted to make a meal plan at the weekend and stick to it. They could have some input into it but once it's decided you just tell them no we're having such and such for lunch like we decided. It's worth a try anyway!
Mine don't tbh but I'm a mean mummy and only give them their meal, no pudding if you don't eat the meal, no alternatives, nothing until the next meal. I make sure the portions are child sized and we always have empty plates (unless they are ill). I think the only real answer is be strict.
This is going to sound HARSH! but I have done it both ways round and can assure you that they come to no harm what so ever if you almost never give them a choice where food is concerned. My DD now 13yrs was just like your little ones between the ages of 2 and 8ish -as I was a single parent for several years and I let her choose what we ate. I saw it as a small compensation for other things she missed out on after her dad and I split up. I did her no favours at all.
Now I KNOW that children genuinely do not know what they want and are much happier when parents are incharge and make ALL the important decisions- and make no mistake -what you eat IS an important decision- nutritionally/economically/practically etc etc.
I now also have a DS (who is 3 tomorrow). Food has never been up for discussion at all with him and he is given a plate full- no discussion no asking him if he likes it etc etc and he eats the lot and always has done- he is offered more if there is any left etc and he eats it or declines it if full.
Having chioice about stuff is important but it needs to be proportionate to the child's age. eg DD has £6 per week on a Monday and decides which days she'll have school dinners and makes packed lunch the other days. DS gets to choose what he plays with and what colour pants he wears thats enough for him for now. Next time you have an urge to ask them what do you fancy for lunch- ask yourself why you are doing it....-good luck
I agree that young children are a bit confused/iverwhelmed etc by too much choice. I think my mum does it because they're grandchildren rather than her own kids and also the twins were prem and still little so she worries about them not eating but it doesn't work. She never did it with us though, we got what we were given! I think it's a similar problem to letting them choose what they want to wear. They'll choose something unsuitable then you argue about why they can't wear it etc - much better to just put their clothes out and not discuss it. Easy for me to say though when dd 7m...!
Definitely not just me then.
I usually do ask them what they want for lunch etc. So it's usually something that they tell me they want and like and will eat and then they still don't eat it.
Sometimes I tell them what's coming if I'm doing a roast that I'm sure they like, and there might be a bit of whinging but they'll usually eat it.
I've also noticed that it's instigated by dd1 and then dd2 will follow suit. When dd1 had a tantrum the other day and I sent her to her room to chill out, we then sat down to dinner and dd2 ate quite happily.
If I suggest to them that they might like such and such to eat and then do it, they tend to waste more of it than if they asked for it themselves.
Think I need to be a bit stricter and just say 'this is what we're having' a few more times and see if they get any better. Like the idea about the meal planner Tolly81, will try that. Dd1 has school dinners and she always tells me she tried everything, although she has been know to
lie exaggerate the truth. And she doesn't get any choice day to day but is still happy to have school dinners.
Think we need to get chickens though. Or pigs. The amount of leftovers won't seem quite so bad. At the moment the birds get the bread, the dog gets any meat and everything else goes in the compost bin. It's such a waste. They have no idea of the value of anything. <sigh>
would they be able to help with meal plan, budgeting and shopping? just for a day?
we did this when growing up. we had to cook once a month. had to chose what, calculate portions (8 people to feed), got given a fiver to shop for what wasn't in the larder.
remembers one disgusting mutton stew (cheapest meat at butchers) that we all ate politely
I keep portion sizes small & eat most of the leftovers.
I don't give mine any choice really. They are served what ever I have planned to serve them.
I say no. It's a brilliant little word that simply does not allow children to be wasteful little ingrates.
"Can I have some toast?"
Because, you know, it won't hurt any child to be mildly peckish for forty five minutes.
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