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3 under 3.5 - any tips, strategies and comforting words going?

(8 Posts)
Gentleness Sun 11-Nov-12 16:43:43

First of all, I should make very clear that I don't regret this situation. We thought we'd never have any kids, let alone 3, and had an average of 11mo trying before conceiving AND 4 miscarriages along the way.

But I am a bit freaked as we had expected a bigger gap between ds2 and dc3 - I never in any way expected to get pregnant the 1st month of trying and have only had successful pregnancies on the back of an early loss. But as it happened, we're looking at a 20mo age gap again (as with ds1&2). So come Christmas we'll have 3 under 3.5. In the cold, dark winter.

These are some of my worries: laundry, ds1 having potty training regression, my spd taking a while to go, ds2 being somewhat bonkers and much more active and stubborn than ds1 was, my SAD disorder, my propensity (already starting) to PND, dh being very supportive but not at all observant or quick, dcs feeling neglected or unhappy, I'm not the greatest housekeeper anyway.

Has anyone been in this situation and can you give me your top tips about how to cope? Or things to do now to prepare ahead? Or even just reassure me that it will be alright! It will be, I know. It is just a struggle to remember that...

3b1g Sun 11-Nov-12 19:48:15

I didn't have three under 3.5 but did have four under 4.5. It was quite a long time ago (the youngest two are now eight) but these would be my tips:
1) Be organised. Routine is your friend.
2) Be kind to yourself. Don't set unrealistically high standards.
3) Start getting the children to help. Even two year olds can put away toys, sort socks into pairs etc.
4) Know that it will get easier

Gentleness Sun 11-Nov-12 22:03:59

Thanks 3b1g! Tip 3&4 I'm working on. I sometimes despair that 1 and 2 are out of my reach!

Thefoxsbrush Sun 11-Nov-12 22:44:42

I had 3 under 4 and I had SPD. It's really tough, ESP when you're trying to feed a baby and toddlers need something. Try to anticipate what your children need. Eg always have bottles of juice/water where they can reach so they aren't constantly asking for drinks when you're busy with baby. When its feeding time for baby be prepared with a new set of toys/snacks for other two. Involve older children in everything-helping change nappy/bathing ect.... Get out and about everyday. Nothing worse than being/feeling cooped up with 3 small children. Dont worry, Your newborn will sleep amongst the noise. It gets easier!

Firawla Mon 12-Nov-12 17:51:44

I had 3 under 3.5, ds1 was 3.2 and ds2 19 months when ds3 was born
It was fine, I do find I am busier with the 3 of them than 2 of them but you will be okay you just end up adapting to it.
I've found I've got probably less routine now with the 3 of them and kinda more just take it as it goes. I just let ds3 be fed on demand and sleep when hes tired rather than a schedule as I had for the others, that seemed easier really just to get him to fit in with everything else we're doing.
Have you got a tumble drier? I just stick everything in washer dryer so it saves a job of drying laundry everywhere. Personally i like to go for short cuts like that wherever possible! and dont feel guilty about it, if it gets the job done thats whats important

your house will probably be really noisy, slightly messy & maybe bit less organised than it once was but once they all get bit older sure things will get easier again as they can keep each other entertained! - im still waiting to get to this stage myself as they are 4, 2 & 15 months now. but thinking about #4 too so that shows it cant be that bad!

good luck youll be fine & sure it will be lots of fun for them all being close together

5kidsnobump Wed 14-Nov-12 20:32:52

My youngest 3 are all under 2.5!

Ds3 is 17 days old, dd2 - 15 months, ds2 - 2 yrs 4 months. Also have ds1 - 5 years, and dd1 - 6 years.

Unfortunately don't have any tips yet as I've been in and out of hospital with problems since ds3 was born, but i'm sure once we are sorted with that we will get into a routine.

In my experience you just need to be organised, and try not to achieve too much with so many little ones! Oh and also important is to maintain a sense of humour!

forevergreek Fri 16-Nov-12 10:53:48

Definatley agree with working on independence ( and potty training if possible)

So shoes on/ off ( buy Velcro or slip on)
Cleaning teeth
Helping set table and clear ( eldest is 2.10 here and has been doing for about a year)- both he and next younger brother love it
Eating independently ( blw is great as means from 6 months all can eat pretty much alone)
Independent play ( they have siblings to play with also)

I also batch cook, and all cooking done during Naptime/ quiet time ( all nap ATM but when eldest stops them will still enforce an hour of sitting quietly and reading/ story tapes. This means I can cook without little people under feet, and they often are grumpy by dinner time so more peaceful this way.

katieelh Fri 16-Nov-12 13:50:01

I had 3 under 3, my daughter was 2.5 when I had top tips would be, get organised, have a big sort out and deep clean before the baby comes, use a slow cooker so you prep dinner earlier in the day. Do a load of washing a day,just to keep on top of it. Keep baby wipes in every room so you give things a quick wipe over as you go. If you have a garage or shed, try to stockpile bits and bobs like nappies wipes toilet rolls, bleach. Have a sit down and cuddle with the big ones while the baby sleeps, don't be afraid to use the telly to keep the older ones entertained sometimes.

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