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On becoming Mary Poppins... Toddler and newborn support thread #2

(883 Posts)
ThePinkNinja Thu 08-Nov-12 09:38:53

A place to continue the complaining conversation about the hair pulling days and sleepless nights fun and frolics of life with a toddler and newborn

crazypaving Wed 12-Jun-13 17:52:12

thanks offcolour. I really really need some sleep and a break. I just don't want to see children or hear whinging for 24hrs.

Offcolour Wed 12-Jun-13 18:42:45

Sleep is the key to everything. Without it, everything seems horrendous. Hope you have a decent night tonight.

Mummy2NJ Wed 12-Jun-13 19:10:37

Hi lovely mummy's

I'm new here and reading all your posts has made me feel human again!!
I'm a full time mummy of two utterly adorable ds's
DS1 just turned 2 and DS2 is 7months.
I hope you don't mind if I join you all. I just want a place to rant where no one will judge me as they have no clue what life is like with a tot and bub.

Any of you ladies ever feel as though you have a split personality? forever playing good cop bad cop. One min I'm the sweetest mummy ever the next they drive me potty and I blow up! The worst part I don't even recognise myself when I'm shouting and I absolutely hate being that person. :-(

debbie1412 Wed 12-Jun-13 20:12:37

Welcome 2NJ def split personalities goin on here some days. I go from dragon (guilt sets in ) to mum of the year in a second lol

crazypaving Wed 12-Jun-13 20:29:16

hi m2nj, welcome and rant away! can very much relate to the Jekyll and Hyde thing. I hate it!

Offcolour Wed 12-Jun-13 20:32:57

I think crazy once described herself as a psychotic shrieking witch which I totally identify with smile. I woke up like a bear with a sore head this morn (or like a mum with no sleep) and yelled "everyone STOP being so annoying!!!". But they didn't stop grin.

Welcome 2nj!!

Mummy2NJ Wed 12-Jun-13 22:45:57

Thak you for welcoming me everyone :-))

Good luck to you all tonight, Here is to hoping for at least 20min extra sleep!
I tell myself everyday that ill go to bed early but I never do....... I guess it's just nice to sit and relax with DH for a bit after the little monsters go to bed. Especially when you know the night shift is approaching!!

Funny how it all stops at 7pm then it begins again at midnight!!
Will it ever end?!!

Offcolour Thu 13-Jun-13 05:25:20

Last night was a proper doozy, up 6 times and wouldn't settle for an hour between 11-12, screamed like a banshee. Dh away and not back till late tonight. At least dd at nursery. What the fuck is going on with ds sleep? Calpol calmed him down so I think teeth are a factor, also he's 26 weeks which has a big storm in the wonder week calendar. I really hope this crazy sleep doesn't go on much longer.

crazypaving Thu 13-Jun-13 08:48:23

psychotic shrieking witch, yep, that's me grin I occasionally shout "everyone just BE QUIET!!!!" and I get 2 pairs of astonished eyes staring at me for a brief moment, and then they just get on with their screaming/shouting/whingeing/whatever. Sigh.

offcolour there's something in the air - DS2 is being a right little git at night too. My very wonderful DH took him last night and just got me for feeds so I caught up a bit. I had a bit of a weepy meltdown last night - yesterday was Not Good. It's about time DS2 learned to crawl and I think it's coming - I think it's unsettling him. And everyone in a 20m radius angry

ehmumbo Thu 13-Jun-13 09:05:34

Haven't been on here for ages. Just thought I'd check in with this thread and see how things are going and oh boy I can SO relate to the split personality thing! Hate hate hate myself when I can't stop being annoyed with my toddler. Feel so guilty especially when he will turn around and do something sweet like pick me daisy or give me a kiss to "stop you being cross mummy" sad

My baby is now 9 months and has been awake every night this week with a temperature. wont feed unless he is being cuddled. Am so tired it is making me eat loads - which is not good as i have a wedding to go to in 8 weeks and can't fit into anything still hmm

Mummy2NJ Thu 13-Jun-13 10:23:06

Maybe there is something in the air! The past three nights ds2 has been waking up loads, it's really getting me down. I just want sleep!! He also has a bit of a cold which is pretty annoying!!

Yesterday I cried infront of DH telling him I don't know how I can carry on! He has no clue how I'm feeling, he helps as much as he can but I always still feel like he isn't helping enough.
DS1 keeps doing little things that annoy me. Today I've told myself no more shouting I just calmly ask him politely to stop doing what he is doing. The response is still the same as when i shout and he ends up in time out..... but its working for me I feel so much more relaxed.
I'm just so tiered of being soooooo angry all the time.

I almost went to the doctor yesterday but after reading all the post on here ive realised it's pretty normal for someone in my position to feel anxious and highly stressed at all times I suddenly feel loads better!! I honestly was starting to feel like I prob have some sort of mental illness.

How is it possible for such tiny beautiful people to be so much work!!! Parenting is by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my whole life.
I just want to enjoy my babies but I feel as though I'm struggling to do so sob sob
When will the hard times end I think just getting a bit of sleep would make a huge difference

Offcolour Thu 13-Jun-13 11:26:20

I think that humans are not supposed to bring up children in isolation. Looking after the kids is so much easier when you have bit of company and someone to lend a quick hand. I often wonder how many other mothers are simultaneously going quietly mad inside houses across the country! What did they do before mumsnet? Valium and vodka I guess!

crazypaving Thu 13-Jun-13 12:24:14

I agree - it's so hard and usually we'd have extended family around to raise children. it takes a village and all that.

I've been shouting lots in the past two days and the effect on ds1's behaviour is pretty much instantaneous - he becomes grumpy and aggressive with other children, shouts at me and repeatedly says he wants his daddy. it's so hard not to feel like I'm failing him. must pull myself together.

it would help if ds2 would sleep at night and stop crying all day hmm

Mummy2NJ Thu 13-Jun-13 12:51:09

@crazy I know the feeling! As soon as DH is home DS1 wants absolutely nothing to do with me sad(
I want to be the fun exciting mummy, but I'm just so tiered though.. I can only handle about 10min of physical play. I feel sorry for my son when he wants us to carry on jumping and runing whereas I'd rather we sat down and just did playdough lol.

So true it takes a village to raise a child. whenever we have family stay its so much easier when the responsibility is shard and I get more rest.

Hope the day gets smoother for all. But not long now till the evening rush and a bit of rest x

crazypaving Thu 13-Jun-13 13:39:12

m2nj your age gap is pretty tiny though - it seems some things get easier as the older child gets older and a bit more independent. and boys are like puppies - they just need constant running about.

sometimes I think about how much I look forward to the end of each day and wonder if that will stop at some point, and I'll actually enjoy the days? it won't just be when they go to school, will it? I hate feeling like I'm wishing my life away sad

damn ds2 awake

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 07:10:13

Another dreadful night... Ds teething so as well as waking for food every three hours we have additional wake ups to scream. Up at 330, 430, 6, 630. I really hope he sorts this out soon. Why can't one of my children be s decent sleeper? Starting to feel I'm doing something wrong.

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 07:21:25

He didn't sleep until 330 btw, he was up at 1030 and 130 as well. It was from 330 that it went properly awful though. Great, now dd's up. I want to cry I'm so tired.

Mummy2NJ Fri 14-Jun-13 08:11:20

You poor thing sad I know the feeling. Sorry it was such an awful night for you.

Sending hugs

It's not just your kiddies Hun. DS2 was awful as well so don't beat yourself up. Your are doing a great job.

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 08:46:53

Thanks M2NJ.

Dh took dd for a bit and ds and I went back to sleep for a bit. Having breakfast and feeling more human.

Also checked the scales and I have lost my first stone! Need to lose another stone 10 lbs.

crazypaving Fri 14-Jun-13 08:51:04

oh no offcolour, strong brew for you sad can dh do a night shift over the weekend? ds2 has slept much better the past two nights with dh and I feel like a human being again. he actually slept til 6 this morning shock the longest lie in since he was about 14wks!

it's so so hard when you're so tired. fwiw I don't think it's your fault at all. sleepers are born not made imo - unless you're actually waking him up deliberately wink - and I'm sure that bad sleeping is a sign of intelligence. or something else equally marvellous. hang in there, it won't last forever.

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 09:15:35

Thanks crazy. Ds so far has refused bottles at night, might try again this weekend.

I'm feeling ok at the moment, like a zombie but a fairly happy zombie smile.

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 09:16:27

Ps really glad ds2 has been sleeping better! You guys needed a break.

crazypaving Fri 14-Jun-13 14:15:34

congrats on weight loss! I've eaten an incredible amount of chocolate this week. had lost nearly all my baby weight; am now piling it back on sad something about a crying baby that sends me straight to the kitchen.

crazypaving Fri 14-Jun-13 14:16:21

when dh does the night shift he comes to get me when ds2 needs to feed. last night that was only once shock

Offcolour Fri 14-Jun-13 14:42:17

Ds seems to want fed almost every time. He has grown a lot recently. He was feeding once or twice so let's hope he's back to that soon.

I didn't really have baby weight to lose, was already way too heavy! I'm losing my early twenties drinking weight that I have never been able to get rid off!

I've been quite disciplined because I can really see results and i am feeling more confident. Every time I even have a drink I'm thinking about the calories! Given up squash a d drinking water.

Got to go, dd is running about naked in the garden.

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