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On becoming Mary Poppins... Toddler and newborn support thread #2

(883 Posts)
ThePinkNinja Thu 08-Nov-12 09:38:53

A place to continue the complaining conversation about the hair pulling days and sleepless nights fun and frolics of life with a toddler and newborn

AngelDog Sun 06-Jan-13 22:58:11

Welcome, new people.

No time to read all the posts, but thought I'd amuse you - today I fell down our stairs from top to bottom. I slipped feet first so my bum & back bumped on every single step and got a carpet burn on my arm. I was carrying 12 w.o. DS2 at the time but thankfully he was in the sling so he was completely unscathed. smile

crazy by way of sling/non-sling sleep data, I ached too much today to give DS2 sling naps so DH put a mattress on the floor in our living room and I bf'd DS2 to sleep for naps. He couldn't sleep for more than 45 mins that way, even when I fed him again when he woke. I managed to get the sling on again this evening and he's been asleep now for 3.5 hours. grin Makes a change from spending the evening feeding.

I got a lovely break yesterday when we went out for the day as a family - DH took DS2 in the sling and he slept for 3.5 hours at a stretch then!

debbie - self-setting? ha! My 3 y.o. doesn't do it yet. grin I can't even put DS2 down once he's unconscious, so it sounds as if you're doing well. I can't complain, though - he is a champion sleeper at night.

annie11 Sun 06-Jan-13 23:06:29

*tears. Duh!

whatdoithinknow Mon 07-Jan-13 07:15:09

Great thread! My lo is 3 wks and have two yr old so gna need all help I can get! Its harder than I thought plus eldest doesn't self settle ever!! Next plan to tackle but I know she'll need to cry it out so dreading it! Just wanted to ask angel if ur lo had been ill at all before allergy? Only my eldest had rash and swelling which was allergic reaction to a virus in his system! The gp in a n e said!! ;-)

crazypaving Mon 07-Jan-13 08:39:16

welcome to all new people!

angel your nights sound amazing. wish I was a better sleeper so I could do that.

in fact things seem to be getting worse rather than better. my last 2 days alone with both boys were so awful I'm dreading the next (tomorrow) and it's affecting my sleep - I lie awake feeling stressed and anxious all night. which is so bloody stupid as ds2 went 9-6 last night with just one quick feed at 2am. I could've slept brilliantly and be feeling amazing today angry instead I feel exhausted and at the end of my tether.

why am I finding this so hard??

debbie1412 Mon 07-Jan-13 21:22:30

Crazy your finding it hard because it is hard, bloody hard ! Everyday that passes is a day closer to it getting easier. Got lily down for 9 tonight bet I'm back up there by 9.30 lol x

AngelDog Mon 07-Jan-13 22:59:34

whatdoithinkiknow, that's really interesting about a reaction to a virus. I think DS1 did have an ear infection - he is still struggling to hear what I'm saying and is very snotty. We have a paediatrician appointment for his allergies next week so if it's still going on by then, I can ask his advice.

crazy, that sounds really tough. I agree with debbie, it's tough because it is really hard. I had bad insomnia in the early days with DS1, and he was an absolutely rotten sleeper. I get up and do useful things, then I think at least I've been productive even if I'm not sleeping.

DS1 is seriously bored and getting restless with all the hanging around while I sort out DS2/shower/cook/wash up etc. The questions are constant.

I'm going to try to give him 5 mins a day of 'special time' when I'll do whatever he wants - I was reading that it can help children feel more connected and therefore more positive in general. I think more than that is ideal, but 5 mins is about what I can aim for!

Not looking forward to tonight as I'm co-sleeping with both DSs so DH can get some kip before starting a new job tomorrow. The poor man has insomnia and was awake since 3am today - even though DS1 slept through for a change.

debbie1412 Mon 07-Jan-13 23:16:39

ANGEL ive had a bath with dc1 the past 2 nights just to try to reconnect with him slightly. Seriously the only time I could give him....... guilt guilt guilt x

debbie1412 Tue 08-Jan-13 12:09:26

Well operation getting lily down earlier failed slightly. Down by 9 back up at 10 till 10.30 then up again at 3 till 4.20am. Yawn x

AngelDog Tue 08-Jan-13 23:06:06

Ugh, my super-sleeping DS2 was up for a couple of hours at 4.45am - he went back to sleep but he woke DS1 who was then up for the day. hmm

Had a bit of a better day with DS1 although he was really annoying me by bedtime! wink

debbie1412 Wed 09-Jan-13 07:30:49

Bummed out a friend of mine on Facebook just posted that her little one born same time as mine did 12 hours with only 1 wake up. I don't even think mine went to sleep I was up that often with her. When's it my turn :-(

EMS23 Wed 09-Jan-13 19:19:38

My Threads I'm On has deleted this thread for some reason so I thought it had gone dead!

DD2 is now 16.5 weeks and I think I can safely say that DD1 has finally accepted her. It's been a long, hard and at time, tearful slog to get here but I certainly makes life a bit easier.

DD1 has also gone back to sleeping through, which is great although she has a chesty cough today so I'm anticipating a bad night. Just got to hope she doesn't cough herself sick in the middle of the night. I hate changing bed sheets in the night!

DD2's sleep is awful. She was going down at 7.30pm and waking for 1 feed btwn 1-3am but she has regressed massively and is restless in the evening, requiring resettling a few times and then waking for 2 night feeds (midnight and 4am ish) and then not settling back to sleep very well.
I'm exhausted and I find the days so physically tiring with two this age as it is.

Had a very bad attack of the green eyed monster over Xmas after I saw 3 friends with perfect sleeping babies. I felt like 'why me?'.

Right now I'm craving some me time to get a massage on my achy back and to just sit quietly somewhere. I think I might take myself off for a few hours very soon!

Hopefully this post will put the thread back on my TIO so I can keep up!

GirlOutNumbered Wed 09-Jan-13 19:27:49

What a great thread to find! Just feeding Ds2 who is 17 weeks old... Or maybe 18, I ant remember. Ds2 is 2.5 and getting bathed by daddy. I also have dss who is 9. It's even more fun when he's around!

eversomuch Wed 09-Jan-13 20:01:22

sleep makes all the difference, doesn't it? For most of the past week, DS has been settling down around 8pm and waking just once for a feed. and DD has stopped waking at 5 or 6am and is making it through to 7 or so again, so I'm feeling slightly human again. not sure it'll last, though. DS woke twice last night and I'm probably jinxing us now. and it takes around 2hrs to get him settled in the evening.

I'm still finding it a challenge to get out of the house during the day - it takes so much planning and prep w/ both of them. but we did make it to the park yesterday & a playgroup today. so I feel accomplished, never mind the state the house is in as a result. takeaway tonight bc I had no time to cook.

crazypaving Wed 09-Jan-13 20:16:34

sleep! sleep is everything isn't it? having said that, so is getting out. I have to get out twice a day, pre and post ds1's nap, or we all go bonkers.

I've discovered the secret to survival too - behaving like a cbeebees presenter on speed all day. ds1 loves it and I finish the day exhausted but not too close to suicide grin it is actually getting easier now ds2 will spend more than 30 seconds in his bouncy chair. the transformation has been a developmental leap where he has finally spotted the toys attached to it, and will do 10-20 minutes in it! if I turn it to face the tv he'll do much longer

EMS23 Wed 09-Jan-13 20:31:22

Girloutnumbered - are you me?! I also have a 9yo DSS!

GirlOutNumbered Wed 09-Jan-13 20:46:39

Hi ems23... Makes getting out of the house more interesting doesn't it??!!

debbie1412 Wed 09-Jan-13 23:10:05

Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......,that is all !

lisbethsopposite Wed 09-Jan-13 23:43:05

Can i join?
Hello crazy. My ds1is 28 months and ds2 is 3 months.
I swear ds1has started looking at me with a dissapointed expression. Sort of you never really loved me.
And i never do tummy time.
And the tv is almost always on.

Failure on so many fronts.

blackcurrants Thu 10-Jan-13 02:46:47

oh thank Christ this thread exists. DS1 very energetic outdoorsy 2 1/2 year old. DS2 very placid sleepy clusterfeeding 2 week old. DS is still going to daycare for the month and I still feel knackered- how do you do it?

crazypaving Thu 10-Jan-13 09:27:07

hi lisbeth! last week was horrific for me, and this week couldn't be more different. ds1 has stopped randomly attacking ds2 and now more or less sees him as part of the furniture. ds2 is going longer and longer in his bouncy chair so I can have fun more easily with ds1. it's still no picnic with lots of screaming going on and so. many. sodding. nappies, but there is light!

ds1 is 26m, ds2 is 14 weeks today.

and I seem to have suddenly lost about 6lb! being a stressed out cbeebies presenter has its benefits!

debbie1412 Thu 10-Jan-13 17:24:28

Lily has been sparko almost all day, we are going to be up all night !

GirlOutNumbered Thu 10-Jan-13 18:24:51

H Lisbeth! I know what you mean about tummy time! Mind you, I was rubbish at giving ds1 that too!

WhoahThereCrazyHorse Thu 10-Jan-13 19:12:31

So DS has hit 12 weeks today - the magic age where it all gets better....

That's right, isn't it?


Lifeiswhatyoubakeit Thu 10-Jan-13 19:25:37

Hi everyone, please can I join? I am 37+3 with a 2 and a half year old super-active and very demanding DS and all I have been thinking for for last 2 days is "have I made the most stupid mistake ever" by having a 2nd child now?

We have no family near and DH works very long hours (6am-9pmish, but also has a time-consuming fitness regime to help him cope with stress of job!). DS does go to nursery now three afternoons a week but during this time I have no time to rest but for the mountains of washing, cleaning, clearing up, food prep and phone calls to plumber!

DS is real handful (loving and bright, but often pushes/hits kids and I have to watch him like a hawk all the friggin time) and will not/ cannot play by himself at home. He is also a fussy eater and always request separate meals to us which we have not yet addressed (chose to try to establish big boys bed night routine instead). We go to toddler group, a crafts/soft play group and meet up with friends once a week.

I am in pain (loads of BH contractions and period type pains), exhausted (even tho we only went round Mothercare, Hobbycraft and did painting today) and guilt-ridden (have Babe on tv now instead of playing cars with DS).

It's not going to be any easier with a newborn is it? Is my unsupportive mother right - have I been foolish to have another so soon? If there's anyone in a similar situation with some honest comment please do...

EMS23 Thu 10-Jan-13 19:36:28

WoahThere - ha ha ha!!! 12 weeks my arse!!!
To be fair, DD2 is now 16 weeks and in some tiny, mostly non quantifiable ways, things are getting easier.

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