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having a parenting breakdown - can you come and tell me to pull myself together...

(6 Posts)
McLurkin Fri 12-Oct-12 14:03:05

DD (2.2) fell backwards off her chair (standing on it to wash hrr hands). I caught her before she hit anything but she was scared and crying... For some reason I snapped and screamed 'stop screaming at me!' whilst cuddling her. Poor baby screamed harder, obviously. I realised i was losing it so tried to collect myself but I keep exploding - going mad over (actual and not proverbial) spilt milk and her not lying down for a nappy change (it was really not one that could be done standing as she wanted to do...)

so now I have stuck cbeebies on and she is quiet and the baby (6mo) is contentedly crawling around but I just feel like I have nothing left, keep crying, can't think what to do next. Normally I can think of something whether its getting outside or going for coffee somewhere or whatever. normally I can rein myself in if I snap and shout. I have apologised to dd for shouting and she has come to hug me saying 'mummy sad', but I do not seem able to pull myself together... I don't know what I/we need right now.

actually, now I've written all this, we're on our 3rd postman pat and I am feeling a little calmer, just kind of depleted. she has been tantrumming and pushing boundaries and whinging at everything a lot recently and I think the stress of it has been accummulating. I KNOW she is tiny and not deliberately winding me up but I am finding it hard to beat my emotional reactions with this knowledge right now.

So, yes, tell me to pull myself together and tell me I can get through the next 5hrs til bedtime!

TeaTowelQueen Fri 12-Oct-12 14:13:16

brew only because it's slightly too early for wine and a biscuit.

Been there too and I only have 1! Sounds like you're coming round, you've had a crap day so the only advice I have is to dump any non-urgent chores and treat yourself gently - I often end up cuddled on the sofa with mine watching god knows what on cbeebies and ignoring the dishwasher/ironing/dust that is shouting at me

smile

McLurkin Fri 12-Oct-12 16:36:34

Thanks ttq. I packed a flask of tea and some supplies from the emergency chocolate shelf and packed everyone into pushchair/sling with the intention of going to sit down in nearby green space with tea whilst dd ran around and/or ate chocolate. but she fell asleep! (has stopped napping recently so unexpected) So came home for tea and crap tv and have even managed to start on dinner. Just the dinner bed bath fun to get thru and can properly relax...

Iatemyskinnyperson Fri 12-Oct-12 16:54:11

Poor you. We all have days when the reserves run low. Onwards and upwards!!

GhostofMammaTJ Sat 13-Oct-12 11:04:34

Aw, I hope she was better after a nap. We all have our bad days and days when we shout and get cross.

I think that children need to test the boundaries every now and then to check they are still there. After a while of doing that and getting the reassurance that they are, they settle down again for a while.

McLurkin Sat 13-Oct-12 13:57:01

Aw thanks both. I was starting to feel I had strayed out of bad day territory and into Bad Mother land... but have a bit more perspective on it today! She has molars coming through I think, the baby is starting to crawl and steal her toys and DP has been away a lot recently, so I guess there are a lot of reasons for her to be extra grumpy. (and of course she is two! Little more explanation needed...). I just need to work out how to make sure I can recharge my energy so I can keep being patient and calm and not end up going totally nuts... She is off to the zoo with her aunt this afternoon and I am just reading papers and having a coffee, which is a good start!

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