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Broken hearted over my DS

(939 Posts)
DistressedMumHELP Wed 29-Aug-12 22:09:20

Okay, i want help and reassurance really. I have name changed for this in case anyone recognises me. I was stopped and asked for an account of events yesterday after witnessing an altercation and the police officer noticed the bruise on my little boys cheek. Which i explained was where he had fallen in between the step and bench in my garden, they then noticed he has bruises on his legs around his knees, so eventually they arrested me on suspicion of ABH. I was of course a mess, but i was told at the time that it was procedure etc, so i was compliant with them, Last night i got released on police bail and was of course expecting my little boy back, but today after seeing social services they have said i cant have him returned to me. I am heart broken, i have never hurt my child on purpose, and i look after him as best as possible. Originally they were saying he didnt talk, but today in front of the social worker he was talking, and i am trying to explain that he gets shy about talking, when they say he is friendly etc. They went through all my history and i have been as open as possible with them, and i dont know what to do. They want to keep him in care and are applying for a court order on friday to do so. I plan on seeing a solicitor tomorrow, the only reason i didnt today was because i didnt leave the social services until half 5 so no where was open.


I want him home. Does anyone have any experiences? How long will it take? They said they couldnt say,

puds11 Wed 29-Aug-12 22:29:09

How old is he op

FallenCaryatid Wed 29-Aug-12 22:29:26

I've reported NAIs on children as a part of my role as teacher, and although several investigations have ensued, only two were ever removed from abusive situations.
You give very little information in your post, how old is your son? Have you ever hit him as a form of discipline? How did he get the bruises and are you in contact with someone else who could be hurting him? What history are you talking about, have you been involved in CP issues before?
The police and the SS have a duty of care to your son, if there is no evidence of any intentional abuse, then he will be returned to you. They need to make sure that he is in a safe environment.
Do you have a SW that you could talk to about what is happening, and what will happen over the next few weeks?

DistressedMumHELP Wed 29-Aug-12 22:30:02

They arrested me for ABH on my son!

EleanorHandbasket Wed 29-Aug-12 22:31:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsKeithRichards Wed 29-Aug-12 22:32:48

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JumpingThroughMoreHoops Wed 29-Aug-12 22:32:50

You wouldnt be arrested for someone else "mouthing off", neither would you be arrested as a witness UNLESS you gave the police some serious aggressive backchat.

lisad123 Wed 29-Aug-12 22:33:25

How old is your son? Covered in bruises is fairly normal for a 4 year old plus child but I'm wondering if your son is a lot younger and therefore not so likely to have those "normal" child bruises.
You bruised his arm, pulling him back? Seriously must have been pretty hard sad

Sounds like a lot of back story.
I would get yourself down to solitor ASAP and get everything in writing!
Have you got a good Hv or GP who will support you?

squeakytoy Wed 29-Aug-12 22:33:41

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TheEnthusiasticTroll Wed 29-Aug-12 22:34:18

where you arested for ABH of your son or the person you had a fight with?

I can tell you that children are simply not removed from the result of some explainable bruising and a history of PND, there is more to your story.

You will not find the answers you need on the internet, you need legal advice.

CookieRookie Wed 29-Aug-12 22:34:27

We have a new instruction in work whereby we MUST report any suspicion of child abuse. Could it be that the police officer was being over zealous in his adherence to a similar policy?

We have been told should anything happen to a child we encountered in work we could be prosecuted for failure protect that child.

thebeesnees79 Wed 29-Aug-12 22:34:28

there is more to this. I had moderate/severe pnd after my first and social services were never involved at all.

oneandnomore Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:00

OP, social services would only have grounds to keep a child in care if there is evidence of ongoing, significant harm. You really need to speak with a solicitor regarding these events.
As others have said, I think there is more to this than you are telling us.
Hope you are ok.

DistressedMumHELP Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:01

I do have a social worker and i got to see him today <which i was so grateful for>
I have had social services involved before he was born because my ex was very abusive and the midwife had concerns for his and my safety, so it was investigated before.
Various friends are in and out, but no one i dont trust. I have never ever hit him, I love him to bits. I cuddle him and probably molly coddle him a little. He is two and obviously runs around like a maniac, i would say it was hyper active.
He is in a safe environment, I love him to bits, apparently one the bruises looks intentional.

Vagaceratops Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:30

Was your DS known to SS previously?

NarkedRaspberry Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:32

Benefit of the doubt.

Solicitor. Your MP. No-one on here can help, they can.

EleanorHandbasket Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:58

There has to be a lot more to this I think op.

Sorry but I do.

Vagaceratops Wed 29-Aug-12 22:35:59


DistressedMumHELP Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:10

Social services were involved with my PND because of my ex's abuse, which became more apparent when i was diagnosed with PND and i admitted to the emotional abuse.

greenplastictrees Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:22

Ok. I believe you, I really do. I don't want you to think people don't. It sounds like an awful situation and perhaps due to your honesyt about the DV and stuff they wanted to check it all out and be sure that he is OK. That doesn't make it any better for you, for now, I know.

See a solicitor first thing or citizens advice perhaps. They may be able to help by explaining where you stand or putting you in touch with a good solicitor? do you have a close member of family or a friend to talk to for support?

Also is there a family member who may be able to have temporary custody of your son? (no idea how this thins work or if this is possible but all this is worth looking into while it gets resolved).

Purple2012 Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:55

What did they say when they released you on bail? When do you have to go back?

MrsKeithRichards Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:56

So concerns have been raised in the past?

MainlyMaynie Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:57

My DS is a lot younger than 4 and is constantly bruised. I actually asked the Dr if it was normal and she basically laughed at me (nicely) and said it was totally normal. I would think the injuries would need to be pretty serious to attract police attention.

AnyFucker Wed 29-Aug-12 22:36:58

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Wed 29-Aug-12 22:37:28

Are you able to get legal help?

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