tell me about putting your kids to bed please!

[naturalbaby]

my kids are only little - 3 and 2 (and 8months but that's a whole other story) but every single night i tuck them in, say goodnight, go back a few mins later to tell them to stop monkeying about, tuck them in again, in out in out. it's not fun, every night i end up in a strop and grumpy with them and i don't like it. they are really good, well behaved kids and sleep really well i just can't believe how long i spend telling them off every night! my last words to them before they fall asleep are usually 'will you please stop messing about and just go to sleep!!!' if i leave them to it they wind up again and end up climbing the walls 2hrs after proper bedtime.

when can we have a nice cuddly bedtime story, tuck them in, say goodnight once then not hear a peep from them till the morning?? please inspire me.

[FlyingPirates]

Are they actually getting out of bed, or just talking? If just talking, then just ignore them! Do they share a room? I say they can talk, but must remain in their bed. Bunks help to avoid monkey business!

Trust me when I say it is a phase. My two shared from and early age, 2 and 1 IIRC, and they chat, but as long as they stay in bed, all good!

Now they are older I tens to pile a few books at the end of the bed for them to read if they are not quite ready for sleep.

Often by the time I have fed the abby and put the baby to bed, they are asleep. Bath, teeth, stories, lights out, walk to babys room, bedtime for baby, walk down stairs and open wine! Bliss! All done and dusted by 7.30! Hurrah!

[BertieBotts]

Put them to sleep in separate rooms and carry one through later!

On the other hand, although it's really really inconvenient for you, some of the best memories I have with my sister were made after bedtimes like this. It's really nice for the sibling bond. My mum used to sit outside our bedroom door

[Lougle]

It took a while, but we have 3 - 5.9, 4.0 and 2.5, and we get them down and quiet, now.

DD1 has her own room, and has medication to help her sleep (SN).

DD2 & 3 share. We get them dressed for bed downstairs. Then upstairs for clean teeth. Into bed, a short prayer and a kiss, then 'goodnight'.

That's it. We don't expect them to call us, talk, etc. They have beaker of water that they can drink if they are thirsty. They can come out of their room for the toilet if they need to in the night.

[An0therName]

what time do they go to bed - sometimes an earlier bed time can help - and for yours I would say a sanction of seperation might work

[naturalbaby]

they did share but were winding eachother up and really messing about so now in their own rooms. i did really like them sharing a room, cause i never did as a child and really like the idea so maybe when they're a bit older.

they can't help talking about the day as they fall asleep so that's fine, and when one is really unsettled he can sit up with some books and a light on but they start calling out to eachother, singing, the 2yr old starts hanging upside down out the bed, falls out.....
they are shattered, very active days, very short afternoon nap. it's the 2yr old mainly that just really struggles to calm down and switch off. i've pushed bedtime back by at least 1/2hr as they were really wide awake before and bouncing off the walls so if it's nearer 8pm they settle quicker but 8pm is too late for me!

i ignore as much as possible but at any time of the day if i don't intervene quick enough they wind themselves up too much, i end up shouting then they take ages to calm down again so i end up snapping at every little squeak!

[madmomma]

Aw bless the little monkeys! I'm watching this thread with interest because I will soon have two 12 months apart (boy & girl). They'll have to share a room for the forseeable, so I hope the answers are forthcoming!

[cottonreels]

Im thinking of story cds for your 3 year old. Mog the cat or some such.
For my 2 year old I darken the room to keep all the antics at bay, and put on alight show with music. Same song everynight lasts 15 mins, works most nights

[Firawla]

i agree story cds are good for 3 yr old.. even the 2 yr old aswel, may be worth a try
as for calling out for each other in different rooms, i would probs warn them that if they don't settle down and try to go to sleep quietly they will have to have their doors closed so they can't call to each other and wind each other up, although that may be a bit mean, but might be effective?
ive got a 3 yrs and a 21 months, and have been meaning to move them in together for ages now but i keep putting it off because i worry about this winding each other up thing, i can see them being a lot of trouble in together. they are alright at the moment cos ds2 is in a cot in another room so he just goes down easily so ds1 doesnt really think of trying to call him or contact him after bed time

[naturalbaby]

. they've both got story/lullaby cd's on and a night light/light show. and to the threats to close the door.
my 3yr old is great really, he just gets carried away if the 2yr old is a bit hyper. part of me did wonder a while ago if the 2yr old has adhd as he is soo wired and literally bouncing off the walls most of the day, and covered in bruises bumps and scrapes. but i don't think so really, it's just the way he is. hmm.
maybe i'm just doomed to sit outside his room barking orders to calm down for 45mins every night for the next _yrs?!?

[brawhen]

Try a change for 2/3/4 weeks to break the cycle. In retrospect that's what helped us a lot after enduring endless bedtime shenanigans. (DC were just 2 and just 4 when we started)

Eg for next couple of weeks, keep everything pretty much the same except once it is sleeping time, sit on a chair in the doorway 'watching' them (read a book...) until they go to sleep. Give a stern "Shhh" every time there is noise / wriggling etc. Once this routine established, then start withdrawing instead of sitting (I tell mine I'll come back & kiss them every 3 minutes). Hopefully they will have learnt the habit of lying quietly & will continue.

It wasn't QUITE as smooth as that sounds in practice - but that's essentially what we did and bedtimes now LOADS better.

[brawhen]

Ahem - actually I think it took me a couple of months. But it was def worth the investment.