Walking to school

[JIRkids]

We have about a 10 minutes walk to school, crossing one main road and the rest are residential with widish pavements. I try and hold my children's hands (age 4 and 7) as even though my 7 year old is sensible I want my 4 year old to hold as well as I hate him running off in front incase a car comes off a drive etc. Neighbours all walk the same way and we often end up walking with people we know and the kids are nearly all off infront or off on scooters. My children obviously then don't want to appear younger and get annoyed holding hands. This then cause tantrums from my youngest making the journey to school really difficult. I am not really sure how to deal with this short of setting off really early so we can just go on our own/ or be a bit less anxious and let them just walk next to me. Am I being over protective do you think?

[fuckityfuckfuckfuck]

Yes you're being too overprotective. I have a 7 and a 3 year old and about a 20 minute walk, and I only make them hold my hand to cross the road. Holding my hand all hte way to school would be mortifying to my dd, and she is relatively 'young' for her age.

[GrimmaTheNome]

Your 4 year old is younger than most of them. I don't think you're being overprotective of him.

[isobelle]

JIR
This is exactly how i am - its for a reason, seen a 8 year old hit by car whilst chatting with friends and car reverses from driveway. Cars go on paths near us to pass another car or park - it worried me so much that i bundled by 4, 5 and 1 into the car most days to avoid the meeting others and stress of always raining mine back in...

[jassinkernow]

From what you've said, it seems a bit unfair to the 7 year old. Obviously the amount of risk you take with the safety vs independence question is highly contentious and individual but personally I think by 7 it should have swung a bit more towards independence. the 4 year old is more a judgement call - if you (understandably) think him running ahead is too high risk you do just have to suck up the fuss, or as you suggest, go a bit early. My eldest is 4 and has just started school - we have a fairly similar sounding walk to you and I let her and 3 year old twins scoot on the residential bits. They are all sensible kids for their age and know they'll have to walk with me if they don't listen. Of the 4 year olds going to school there is a whole spectrum of independent walkers/bikers/scooters/hand holders and a few in buggies. I think it depends on your child and your own views, but I'd be inclined to try them walking next to you I think.

[An0therName]

I would say walking next to you - with the sanction of holding hands if they run off

[cory]

I think it is perfectly ok:

a) to tell your dcs that you have to hold hands to and so hold hand of 4yo but not of 7yo
(we had all sorts of privileges for older children and found this is actually a good thing, because it's something for them to look forward to)

b) to tell dcs that it doesn't matter what other children do because these are your rules

c) or let them both walk beside you but with hand holding as a potential sanction