Normal feelings or am I not coping?(6 Posts)
I have a 10 month DD and am 20 weeks preg with DC2. DD is very active and into everything, just started walking and very busy.
I am often short tempered and feel like I'm not coping. I am coping, if that makes sense, in that DD is well loved and cared for, I'm washed and dressed, house is clean and tidy as far as having a young DD racing about allows it to be! We are all fed well etc so outwardly I am coping,I am functioning quite well. But inside I feel like I'm only just holding it together.
Cleaning DDs teeth is a battle and I really struggle to hold it together and not scream. Changing her nappy is a battle, getting her dressed is a battle.
On the whole, she's really an easy baby and I recognise this but still feel like it's a constant struggle.
I'm terrified of how we will cope with DC2 if I'm struggling with one child.
I get frustrated and angry at DH for no real reason and I know I'm being unreasonable but I can feel the anger inside me and need to vent.
I've been to the doctor who has just said that's how parents feel. Is it? Is this normal? Do most parents feel slightly on the edge and tired and frustrated most of the time?
We do have financial issues at the moment too andvproblems with work, so maybe it's all just getting on top?
I don't know, I'm so worried I'm cracking up.
Any advice would be great
given your circumstances - eg new baby and new one coming, and money and work problems I would say that its all completly normal - that's A LOT to deal with - and would make anyone feel stressed and grumpy with there OH - one of those would do it -
and 10 months or so can be a tricky age
do you have friends/family support? That is people who will give you a hand, let you have a rest or just be nice to you -
are you having any fun? do you have a baby sitter that kind of thing
and swimming/other exercise for me is a great stress relivers
finances - best place to start is moneysavingexpert
and maybe mention to the midwife or a different GP how you are feeling - just people its natural doesn't mean it shouldn't be kept an eye on
I'd say it was pretty normal if you're stressed by child, finances, work etc. I remember finding the weekends very claustrophobic when my DS was that age. You do it because you have to do it but it's easy to get snappy over nothing as a result. I think it's really important to take time out to smell the roses occasionally. Take a break.
Thank you so much for your replies. It's comforting to know that it's probably normal to feel this crap!!! And I'm not just going nuts!
I'm not surprised you feel like that with everything you've got on your plate at the moment! I often have a barely suppressed scream inside me to be honest, I have a toddler and a baby and it's hard work. My only advice would be to try not to worry about how you'll manage when your second baby is born. I stress myself a lot more than necessary by constantly worrying about the next thing e.g. when I'm trying to get the baby down for a nap, I'm also stressing out about how I'll manage it the next day and the next. Pointless stress, particularly as every day is different with babies. Also, I've found my mood has settled down now I'm not pregnant, in some ways being pregnant and dealing with a toddler was harder than dealing with the toddler plus baby, just because I was so hormonally moody while pregnant.
Thanks zimbah I too feel it may be the pregnancy hormones. With DD I was emotionally very stable and no different to when I'm not pregnant. I've been an emotional wreck from the week I conceived I think. I hope it will all calm down once the baby is born.
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