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Soon having second child, 18 months after first(7 Posts)
I just wondered whether anyone had a similar age gap and had any advice to give me, just ahead of my second child arriving (am currently 38 weeks pregnant). Anything I can do to prepare? Am a little bit scared of how I will juggle everything. Dc1 seems to be showing signs of starting to tantrum, which is a worry.
Oh yes, and what is up with random strangers coming up to me and 'kindly' informing me 'you do realise it is going to be hard work'?!! How is that helpful?
Mine are 18 months apart. I don't actually remember it being that difficult (although they are now 10 and 11, so I may have blocked it out!).
The 2nd child was much easier as a baby than the 1st. I'm thinking it's because I just didn't have the time to pick her up all the time, whereas when I had my first baby, he was rarely put down!
Involve your older child in everything you do with the baby, whenever possible. Let him/her fetch you wipes, 'test' the temperature of the bath, hand you towels etc.
And get out of the house as much as possible. The baby will sleep in the pram while you play in the park with your older child, therefore giving him/her as much attention as possible. The baby won't remember a slight lack of attention, but your older child might.
just ignore the 'helpful' strangers, even if it is hard at times you will be fine! i think its a good age gap, i had my first 2 17 months apart and just had another one 19 months apart. the good thing is you dont seem to get a lot of jealousy they adapt very quick at that age. also when they grow up a bit they are quite close in age to play together, which is nice
my 2nd was also an easier baby, in terms of being put down and going for naps easily etc he was no trouble at all so i think they can become quite adaptable as they have to fit in with the older one?
and definitely agree with the advice of getting out the house a lot, i found that really helpful for mine. it made a huge difference for me whether i took them both out or just stayed in, the time goes much quicker while out and sometimes if i stayed at home too much, could go a little bit crazy
but really, its not so bad at all, you will be fine and you adapt to it quickly. good luck!! and anyone who gives you annoying comments like that, just smile and ignore
Also, try not to forget that your first child is still really only a baby, too. Don't expect too much from him/her.
Thanks that is some really good practical advice. I have my fingers crossed for a laid back baby! My daughter was barely put down for her first 8 months, but practically speaking it will not be possible to do this, this time around.
I am a big fan of getting out of the house too so think we shall be doing a lot of that.
I have the same age gap & I must admit I did find the first year very very hard! But now they are 2 & almost 4 we are really seeing the benefit, they play together beautifully & are very close. For the first year I was either out, or sitting inside feeding & watching beebies. It is a great thing to get them to nap at the same time if at all possible and then sit and have a cup of tea! On no account do housework! The house was a tip for about 18 months, but it is quite respectable these days. All the best.
I had the same. It was hard as my first was quite jealous and didn't really understand reasonaing till over the age of two. My tips are:-
Sleep when they sleep - absolutely vital
Don't feel guilty if you need to use CBeebies a bit - it's a passing phase and very soon they'll get loads more stimulation by being a sibling
Once they sleep through they can share a room really nicely
Have a shower before going to bed then you just need to get dressed in the morning
Online supermarket definitely (and cleaner if you can afford them)
Accept all help offered and ask for more
Don't expect too much of yourself or your PFB - it's so lovely having another little one and you really feel like a proper family but it is all hands on deck and a time of change so take it easy on yourselves.
Good luck and let us know how you get on!!!
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