had a shitter of day with screaming kids am going mad please help(13 Posts)
aaaargh i bloody hate being at home with kids. today have driven me mad. was so close to leaving them in house and driving off just feel at breaking point.
last night 4 month old up twice then toddler up at 7 so knakered before day even started. then just usual toddler grisling and whining, refused to eat, have nap everything then baby screaming for no reason even tho fed and changed etc. with both screaming just felt like crying punching walls then driving off.
just feel like am going mad. its so endless havnt been away from them since baby born. do get to go to gym, shops etc but dd is ebf so cant leave her too long even with expressed milk. feel really desperate and sick of monotony and drudgery of being at home and bloody washing.
feels like my life is useless and am not a real person.
am due back to work soon but they are being really funny about days and i will probably have childcare issues so may be a while yet before it works out.
please someone advise me
Any friends or family that could take them for a day? Or two? Does your gym have a creche? Childrearing is isolating and stressful. If all else fails go to a park and have a cup of tea. Hope you get some kip tonight.
Sorry, didn't read the ebf bit properly. That does make it harder to get away.
If you could just get a good nights sleep you would probably feel so much better about everything. If you don't manage a good nights sleep is there anyone who could have dc tomorrow so you can get a few hours sleep?
Dont worry about things like going back to work and child care yet, just try to get through each day
When you do look at child care use the www.childcare.co.uk website. I am a childminder and have found it really useful.
Now have a nice bath, an early night/ relax with a book and tomorrow will be a new day and soon all these early days will be over and you can look back with rose tinted spectacles
Get out of the house with them. Get a thermos, shove the children in the buggy, in raingear if need be, and escape. It kills aliquots of time and it's much easier not to lose your rag in public.
Monotony and drudgery etc, I know where you are coming from, but remember life always feels a bit better when you have had sleep and when the children haven't driven you quite as mad. Get a large glass of wine and start again tomorrow.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
thanks for all the replies it is really helping. just hard to see through the drudgery sometimes.
sounds like a normal day at our house! im a sahm to 6 kids and i can quite honestly say i dont think i have even had half an hour alone in the last 10 yrs!my youngest two even get in the shower with me.Its very very hectic at our house!
Hectic is different to desperate though, some people cope better than others.
OP you sound totally frazzled, is there anyone at all who could help a bit for a while? Have you confided in people close to you?
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
hi, yes have help in the form of mil who is always happy to have eldest. cant leave baby for long as breastfeeding. but only thing is mil doesnt drive so have to drop ds off and pick him up which sometimes feels like more hassle?
bf been going really well and am glad have done it this long but am thinking of maybe stopping so can leave dd for longer? but dont really want to stop. just cant think straight atm.
have you considered expressing? that way baby is getting breast milk and you can leave house/ get a break. also it really helps to introduce the bottle early rather than later. i couldnt get my ds to take a bottle at 10 months of ebf! also, wondering if youre generally run down/ feeling low. a break away would do. at least for an afternoon. if MIL is so good express milk and then just go out, let MIL take care of baby and disappear for 2-3 hours. do you have gf you can go visit for a cuppa? please dont think you dont have a life. your kids need you and depend on you and you are doing a great job. it can be a very isolating time being at home with kids. i felt like that at times but now i go out every single day, usually in the PM after lunch and once they have napped. Search high and low for playgroups that you like/ enjoy and think youre going to meet mums at. You will be surprised how 'together' you will feel once you get into a routine. After a while you will naturally egt bored but just switch your routine around a bit. But plan to go out every single day and force yourself to go to places where you will be around other mums. You are certainly NOT on your own. We are all going through/ have been through similar things, just try find a solution dont let this eat you up.
if you drive, do your dc sleep at a similar time? if so consider taking them for a drive so they can nap in the car. or if not consider doing that anyway, esp if you know your older dc will sleep at that time. your 4 mth old will probably drift off too in a car at any time. you may not be able to move them out but once asleep you can then maybe grab yourself a drink and catch up in the front seat with your women magazines! my eldest usually goes into a deep sleep and i can usually then transfer themto their beds. it may not sound ideal for some but it gives me some time, even if just 45 mins
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