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HELP PLEASE I FEEL LIKE A TERRIBLE MUM

(10 Posts)
Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 18:16:41

Someone help me please. I seriosly feel like I cant cope at the moment. DD is 5 and is being an absloute nightmare. We got back from holiday on tuesday where she had a good time but was exhausted by the end of it. DP (her dad) still off work as well till tomorrow.
We had some issues on holiday at the beginning with hitting me when I told her off etc but she did get better. Since we got back she has been a nightmare, being really naughty, argumentative, hitting etc, I feel like I have done nothing but say no and tell her off even shouting which I hate.
As soon as we got back we made sure she was back in her normal routine etc but we were going to go out to see her godmother who we havent seen in ages tonight., which dd was really looking forward to. She has been such a nightmare that I have ended up telling her me and her are no longer going. I feel really bad as I even ended up crying in front of her which I hate. I just dont know what to do with her any more, I do things with her, take her places, involve in what I have to do etc. We went out on Thursday but told her that friday and today we were spending at home.
We have been having issues with sleep for months, while on holiday as she was going to bed later and in our room she slept all night but as soon as we got back we were back to waking several tiems a night which I am sure is not helping!!!

Sorry for the rant, just need to vent.

Megastar Sat 06-Aug-11 18:35:02

Sounds like she has had a bit of change recently but she needs to know that things have got to change. In my opinion(which you can ignore) is the first step is to sort out the sleep then she may be better behaved as a result. Have you ever tried control sleeping? It is bloody hard work but normally only takes max of 5 days if you are really strict. Also not wanting to sound too supernanny ish try using the time out in the day for behaviuor and or removing toys. Have had to do this all with my three year old and it worked for him!

Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 18:55:10

Hi, thanks for the reply. We have been working on the sleep foe ages by returning her to bed every time she appears in our room, she usually goes to bed ok. We do use time out in the day but she sees it as a game then when it is over she just carries on. I just want to cry at the moment!!!Will be back but may not be for a little while as Im going to go and take DD from DP for cuddles before bed.

Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 19:22:55

Meant to add we also use a "sleep fairy" too not that it is working at the moment.
DD in bed now and DP out so will be able to pop back on regularly now.

outthere Sat 06-Aug-11 19:49:00

Hiya, thanks for replying on my thread. Had a better day today so I can think with some objective clarity!

I wondered whether there might be something else you could use as a consequence rather than time out? One of my DSs has Autistic Spectrum Disorder and mostly doesn't "get" timeout. It has little or no effect on him whatsoever so we try and find other consequences... basically anything which we KNOW he will dislike; taking his favourite toy away for a set period of time for example.

It's SO, so difficult and I really wish I could help but as you know, I'm struggling a lot myself at the moment. Hope you manage to get to the bottom of it all soon, it sounds like a nightmare sad xx

Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 20:09:53

Thank you for the reply. She is being assessed by various people at school etc at the moment so do wonder if that is some of it. One of the reasons I ended up saying we werent going tonight was the timeout not working, she really wanted to go and Im hoping that she may understand it more.

Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 20:33:56

Bumping up.

Megastar Sat 06-Aug-11 20:34:59

I also agree with Outthere, When I feel I don't have time for time out fight I warn my son that his toys will go into a confiscation box which I put out of reach but within sight and then wait untill he does something good/kind/helpful then really praise him and tell him he can have it back and why. The key is definatly the praise issue and also never backing down. I really feel for you as life sounds really difficult. I suggest you also have a really good cry I always feel a bit of a plum but it is a really good release.

Foxy800 Sat 06-Aug-11 20:46:15

Thanks for the reply, dp is out and dd is in bed so sitting here thinking and texting a friend who is a good person for me to vent at bless them.

Foxy800 Sun 07-Aug-11 14:12:21

Fingers crossed, Daddy is back at work and we are beign better behaved that we have been. Just dropped her at her Nan's for a couple of hours.
Thank you for the replies.

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