Twins are nearly 8 and that feeling I had when they were newborns who never slept and settled and my life was manic and exhausting, well that feeling has not gone away.
Every aspect of my life has been taken over by the children to the point that even when I get time to myself I don't really bother doing anything because it is only a matter of time before I have to do something for them, with them, to do with them.
I have been sat here for an hour or so wondering what the hell is the point of it all. Not in a suicidal sort of way, just in a totally can't be bothered with anything sort of way. My life before kids was by no means perfect, but at least I had some independence and freedom and control over my life. Now that has disappeared.
We are off on holiday soon and people keep asking me if I am looking forward to having a break - wtf? if I left the twins at home then that would be a break, but I am not, so it will be the same old stuff just in a different location. I am not going to be having romantic evening meals, strolls along the beach, cocktails and then a long lie-in and lazy days by the sea am I? It will be bickering, sandcastles, packing and unpacking bags, organising toys, clothes, food and playing. Am i weird because I don't think that is going to be fun?
But I don't know of anyone else who feels like this, just me it seems. I just don't see how this is going to get better. I thought life would be easier as they get older but actually it is getting worse as they stay up later and so we have even less of an evening to ourselves too. Each day I look forward to 9pm and then I can tidy up in peace and sit on the sofa for an hour or so, then go to bed. Woohoo.
Has anyone else been through this and come out the other side perky and enjoying parenting after all? Please tell me I can turn this around.
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Just not enjoying being a parent at all - anyone else?
32 replies
StickyFloor · 24/07/2011 19:37
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