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Does it have to be so bad?

(10 Posts)
Maternelle Mon 18-Jul-11 11:08:46

DD1 is 4.5, DS 3 and DD2 is 1 month old.
I am finding hard to cope. DD1 and DS argue all the time, won't do a thing I ask them to do, scream, shout and are being horrid. On their own they are pretty lovely. Together, I can't cope.
I feel guilty as I know the new baby must have change their world, but I am finding it very hard to cope.
I can't have them in front of Cbeebies all day, can I?

whyme2 Mon 18-Jul-11 11:17:14

cbeebies is your friend, especially while you have a very young baby.

I only have sympathy for you, no real advice, I had four dcs in five years.

whyme2 Mon 18-Jul-11 11:21:18

Is there someone who can help you with the older dcs. Even just removing one of them for a couple of hours will make a difference.

Try and be gentle on your self too. I found that the hardest time. dh back at work, things settle down but you are getting broken sleep and the new baby thing has worn off a little.

timetosmile Mon 18-Jul-11 11:21:28

I remember a friend in your position being blush when her 3yo said "that tellytubbies is the same as it was this morning" one afternoon...she had a 3yo and newborn twins.
You have all my sympathy, it's just hard, hard work at the moment, but it will get easier, so please don't beat yourself up. Say yes to anyone that offers any kind of sensible help whatever, and just aim for a bare minimum to be done - whatever it takes to get you through...good luck for the next few months and hope you are feeling better (and better slept) soon as you all settle in to family life together x

Maternelle Mon 18-Jul-11 12:27:43

Thank you xx.
I did try to do too much this morning I think.
My mum is on holiday in the area and she came to pick up DS.
2, I can deal with...
I will be on my own from next week. Dreading it!

camdancer Mon 18-Jul-11 12:37:44

I'm in the same position - 4yo, 2yo and newborn. I've decided to write this summer off. I've bought some new DVDs for when we've had enough of cbeebies! My aim is to get out of the house each day - even if it is just a walk round the block. Anything else we do accomplish will be a bonus. But the summer will pass and once the baby is a bit older (and sleeps better) life will be easier.

Maternelle Mon 18-Jul-11 12:44:00

I started the day pumped up with good intentions... It's the arguing that drives me mad. And then I start shouting and they get steadily worse.
We're lucky to have a big garden, and until now I chucked them out of the house whenever I could, but it's been raining non-stop for days...
Do you still go out in bad weather Camdancer?
Until now I have only been switching the TV on after 5pm but I probably should relax the rules. I am sure too much TV is less damaging than shouting and fighting.

whyme2 Mon 18-Jul-11 13:12:56

I think you're right about the tv Maternelle We had small doses of it through out the day. I also used it as a bit of a bribe, ie lets do this and then you can watch (name programme/dvd)

We do try and go out even if it is wet, the dcs have all got wellies and coats and baby is okay tucked up under the raincover. I try and have a 'point' to each day, ie library visit, choose dinner and go shopping, visit friend.

somehow it is a whole different dimension if one dc is with a friend or grandparent and therefore sooo much easier.

Good luck. smile

camdancer Mon 18-Jul-11 13:51:58

I'd love to say I go out in all weathers. "There is no bad weather only poor clothing choices" and all that! hmm I do try, but sometimes it is just a drive to Tesco or something like that. If we don't get out of the house for a bit - even for a drive in the car - we all start shouting at each other.

We have the tv on pretty much all day but the DC's don't watch it much at all. They just get on with whatever they want to do. It is just background noise. It's great at this time of year, 'cos I can put the Tour De France on all afternoon. smile

whyme2 Mon 18-Jul-11 16:12:02

lol at Tour de France. My dcs put up with quite like Come dine with me now.

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