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stropy teen ,partner's losing patience

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saffy66 Wed 13-Jul-11 14:27:24

I come out of a really bad relationship then I have been single for about a year before i met someone.I live with my ds (17) and I see my other ds (12) at weekends who lives with his dad. They can be sometimes hard work as teen boys are and I am struggling to controll them . My older has aspergers which doesn't make things easier at all. I can be conservative as a parent , I am not English and I think my values are important to stick too but also I can be judged as a mum who does too much for her children.The man I met a year ago is lovely ,kind and supportive and he says he loves me and for this reason he can not cope with the way my sons treat me they are disrespectful and don't listen . dp thinks I can not controll my 2 sons at all. Things are easier when he is around,(I know it is wrong, I shouldn't put that responsibility on him ) although he doesn't like interfering so he just stays quiet most of the time and let me deal with them.I should be strickter but have my own idea how to deal with them but I have to admit a lot of time I end up shouting at them and get nowhere which can be flustrating watching from outside. I would like to move in with dp and my ds would too as he actually likes my dp but he is against the idea so much that i think our relationship is doomed because of this. I know a lot of you reading this and will tell me that children come first and I agree I am just sad I feel i will never be able to find a way to make this situation better for everybody . The only option is live separately from DP until they grow up and became independent? Am I destined to be alone bringing up my lovely ds as noone can cope with them?

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