DS goes to school and is about to finish reception - he's only just 5.
He's an odd mix of nervous (new situations; being separated (still) from me) and then very confident - his school reports say that he's a confident and sociable member of class and quite cheery (still cries when I drop him off though so clearly turns that off once in the door )...
Anyway, also have a younger sibling who is happy to potter generally.
DS won't do anything on his own. If we're at home at the weekends he either wants the telly or the wii on and if I say it's time to turn them off then he asks what we're going to do. If it's nothing then he throws a strop, if it's something, it's "when are we going, when are we going", once we do what we do, it's wanting to move on to the next thing. When we get in from school it's "who is going to play football with me ?"....In his eyes, if I'm not busy doing chores then I must be available to play with him. Why not ? DH finds it hard too - he works long hours but comes home a couple of nights a week earlier so he can do bath /stories and
makes sure he does some things with DS at the weekends and also for himself but even then it's not quite enough for DS.
Another example...last week at school there was a book stall, I wasn't going to buy anything. I told him he could look but not buy. He threw a strop. A friend gave him something I said he could have when we got home (we walk and I have younger dc ) and he threw a strop. He wanted a snack - I didn't have one, he threw a strop....I told him he could cry all the way home if he liked but I wasn't giving in - eventually he gave in.
If he has a friend over, he'll be happy. I work part time and he goes to a childminder after school 2 days and dc2 is at nursery - he enjoys the childminder as she has other mindees from school. On my days off we walk to and from school together and after school occasionally do things with his friends (not that often as my days are limited in the week) or just do jobs (local) or simply come home and play. I do a mixture of stuff with them (for eg on Sat morning I got up and played games with the kids for an hour at 7am (!) and then took them to the park so they could ride their bikes) and then boring day to day things which they need to learn are part of life probably like the majority of us.
It's hard to explain really but unless we're occupying him, he will go on and on until he thinks he'll get what he wants. If anyone comes over (adult) he'll be such a pain that you can't talk to them - even if it's just someone like my mum who is in and out of our house regularly - it's just attention seeking behaviour most of the time.
Does this ring bells with anyone - will it get better ? Any coping mechanisms ? Today we had total meltdown and i sent him to his room to calm down.....thanks for reading this far anyway !
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5 year old only happy if doing what he wants to do and throws strops if world isn't revolving around him....
5 replies
Broadwalkempire · 06/07/2011 18:09
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