court

[Clairebearclaire]

Hi I'm new to mumsnet it was recomended by a friend. Quick Story please dont judge got married had 2 kids split up (about a year) had another by someone else split up when baby was 2 weeks old (he was violent went to prison was a thief etc etc) got back with eldests 2 kids dad pregnant again due in 8 weeks. Me hubby and eldest 2 have all got same surname and so will new baby. My little girl who's one has ex's surname. She's been brought up by my hubby since she was 3 weeks old he provides everything for her treats her the same as the other kids. Ex has had no contact he's never provided anything for her half of her first year he spent in prison for violence against me. He's just applied for a contact order. I asked his permission to add my surname to my little girls and he refused I've applied to the court to double barrell her last name reasons are so she doesn't have a totally different last name to her siblings. Paid £200 for a order was at court yesterday and I have 7 days to give my reason why its in her best interest to add my name. Help!!!!

[Sparklyboots]

You give excellent reasons here - she should be able to fit in with her family and not feel left out. I would just be really clear and straightforward with the court - they are only interested in the well-being of the child and so if you stick to that, and try not to make it a power struggle between you and your ex, you probably stand a good chance. I was adopted by my step-father and though the path there was difficult, when it came to the hearing it was over in seconds because the court thought that it was in my brother's and my best interests. Good luck x

[Clairebearclaire]

Thanks Sparklyboots x

[Clairebearclaire]

bump

[Clairebearclaire]

Went to court yesterday I've applied to add my surname to my daughters her surname now is say Smith mine is brown. I've applied to change it to smith brown my ex is opposing this but will allow me to change it to brown smith what does anyone think???

[monkoray]

I principle this sounds like a reasonable compromise. What does your DD think?
Sorry i didn't post on the original, i saw Sparklyboots comment and she summed up what i would have said.

[Clairebearclaire]

My DDs only a baby don't know weather to accept this or wait and see what the judge decides

[swash]

I would post this in Legal for advice if I were you. It's a tricky situation to comment on if you don't have relevant experience. Good luck.

[Clairebearclaire]

Thanks swash I've posted on legal but no one replied yet