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Unfriendly daughter

(10 Posts)
Amykins Sun 12-Jun-11 23:28:23

My beautiful daughter is bright, funny, loving and caring. However, I feel that it is only me who sees this.

She is shy/unfriendly to the point that she won't talk to any other adult apart from me (and my husband a bit).

I don't know whether this is just extreme shyness and a "phase"; if it isn't then I need to know how to help her and if it is, then I still need to know what to do.

Feel as if other mothers at toddler groups and church think she is very strange.

Any ideas?

monkoray Mon 13-Jun-11 09:27:55

How old is she? You say she won't talk to other adults but what its she like with other kids? Tbh its how she interacts with children that is important for later life, not whether she talks to adults. Some kids are shy, thats different to being unfriendly. They need to start off slow, with one or two people they can get to know enough to want to open up. If toddler group and church are busy places she may feel overwhelmed. Have you tried playdates with just one other child?

Curlybrunette Mon 13-Jun-11 10:04:38

My son is the same, a gorgeous friendly happy boy but he chooses who he will and won't speak to. He's generally ok with kids but my friend is his key worker at preschool and there he's fine with her, but at school when me and friend are dropping the older ones off at school he won't even acknowledge her, he's actually quite rude to her and if we give her a lift (she's recently given her car up) he will say "mummy I don't want a stranger in our car". I just accept he's a stroppy little devil at times!!!

How old is your daughter, does she have friends, how does she interact with other children?


Amykins Mon 13-Jun-11 11:02:22

She is 2, will be three in August. She has a good friend who she loves and plays quite well with some other little ones.

I think she is shy to be honest, just feel I'm getting anxious about it and making it worse.

Thank you for your comments.


Curlybrunette Wed 22-Jun-11 21:51:08

She sounds fine Amykins, just shy. My ds1 was quite shy (but not stroppy with it like ds2!) and the older he got the better he got. He's 5 now and usually fine with adults x

Parietal Wed 22-Jun-11 21:53:39

I would be surprised in a 2 yr old did talk confidently to unknown adults. Shyness at that age is normal.

cory Thu 23-Jun-11 07:32:36

I think the best way to help her is to seem relaxed about it: encourage her gently, model your own appreciation of other people, but don't push or stress her. I was horrendously shy at this age, and my ds did not speak at all- we have both come out of our shells since.

MumblingRagDoll Thu 23-Jun-11 09:34:09

Both of my DDs are/were like older one to an extreme degree...she's 6 now and is SO fin that I wonder wy I worried! 2 is tiny...she's just being careful.

Amykins Thu 30-Jun-11 09:18:48

Thank you very much everyone.

mumeeee Thu 30-Jun-11 09:39:59

She is normal for a 2 year old. Just give her time and don't push her to speak to other adults.

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