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Am i a bad mum?

(5 Posts)
Hayleyw Mon 06-Jun-11 09:53:29

Hi fellow mums, im feeling really terrible today, I have 3 year old twin girls who i love dearly however i find myself getting very frustrated with them and shouting at them a lot, My husband is getting sick of it and says he just wants one day when there is no shouting in the house!. i wish i didnt shout at them so much but unless i shout they dont listen and just ignore me which makes me even more frustrated, I also suffer from Bi-polor disorder which dosnt help, am i bad mum cause i shout at my kids?

McDreamy Mon 06-Jun-11 09:59:29

No you're not a bad mum but unless you try and find a strategy to try and stop the shouting it will continue. (In my experience anyway). I am just finishing a Parenting Course called Triple P. It's a free course run locally, I found out about it through primary school which isn't relevant for you yet but it might be worth asking your HV if there is something available locally for you.

Apart from that there are some very good books available on how to handle children. The one that springs to mind is How to talk so children will listen and Listen so children will talk (or something like that).

You are not a bad mum though, having one 3 year old is tough so having 2...!!!!! Whatever you decide to do you need to have your DH onside though as consistency is key!

Good luck! smile

holyShmoley Mon 06-Jun-11 10:49:36

i think parenting can be very stressful and intense. My twins are 20 months, and we also have a 3 year old.

A couple of thoughts: firstly decide/choose not to shout, secondly think about what triggers you to shout and what other things you could try, both other actions and other ways of viewing their behaviour (e.g. They aren't ignoring you but doing something they prefer, such as running about squealing rather than getting dressed). Lastly accept that 3 yr olds are really really good at zoning out, it's what they do, and it is so normal.

I have the how to talk book too, and also really like Playful Parenting by Cohen.
Yes, it is tough but we'll get there.

McDreamy Mon 06-Jun-11 13:43:58

Hi Hayleyw - how is your day going? smile

Hayleyw Mon 06-Jun-11 16:03:33

Hi Mcdreamy (where did that name come from?) its ok thanks hun, been doing my best to hold my tounge and not shout. x

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