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what makes you an unusual mum?

(61 Posts)
NotThereYet Fri 27-May-11 13:39:57

Just wondering what things you do that you don't see other Mums doing, or what aspects of your character you don't think make you typically 'Mum-like'?

Octaviapink Fri 27-May-11 13:51:51

Not having any television. We haven't had tv for six years, so the children have never seen CBeebies or anything else.

CheerMum Fri 27-May-11 13:54:24

I think childhood should be FUN

(seems to me a lot of mums i know think this is unusual)

cfc Fri 27-May-11 14:05:04

I our group of peers, I'm the one who doesn't care about mess and dirty hands etc - or mud in hair, or painting the outside of the house, or the walls inside with chalk. I let the boy make his own mistakes (nothing that looks like it's going to kill him or break an arm!) and I don't talk down to him. We speak on an adult level (well, one way, anyway!!).

I believe as a result I have a boy who doesn't do the flappy hand thing when he gets dirt/paint etc on his them, whereas ALL of the other babies, bar non, do this. He also falls very, very cleverly.

He's also as mad as a box of frogs, but that's more his nature than my nuture, I reckon.

gourd Fri 27-May-11 16:03:42

Cycling. Not many women do it anyway but even fewer with caring responsibilities. Most can't make that kind of time commitment plus the money for kit/bike etc. I only do it once a week now though, about 60 miles max. Used to cycle 250 miles a week so it's a bit drop. My partner and I met through cycling, so he's very supportive which helps, but breastfeeding does cut down my options for ride time/routes and also evening velodrome sessions aren't possible at all at the moment at all as they interfere too much with feeding/bedtime routine. I expect that once I'm back at work, even if I'm not breastfeeding any more, my evenings and weekends will be even more difficult to fit cycling into as I'll want to spend time with my family, but I'll be cycling to work 5 days a week (an hour each way) which I guess will still make me different to a lot of other Mums.

Shodan Fri 27-May-11 16:26:11

I'm a first dan in karate.

To 'the outside world' I am an ordinary, middle-class, well-spoken SAHM with probably nothing more taxing to concern me than what I should cook for dinner.

At karate, however, I have a reputation for being somewhat scary to spar with... I like that.

It also means ds1's view me with great respect grin. Especially since the father of one of them used to train with me and came off worst in a sparring session. According to ds1 and all his friends I 'took him down'. Truth is he slipped and fell all on his own, but as he was sparring me at the time I took the credit blame.

Shodan Fri 27-May-11 16:26:48

ds1's friends , that should say.

transactionerror Fri 27-May-11 16:28:11

I'm doing a degree in musical theatre, purely for my own interest. Most mums I know are only interested in the financial benefits of a degree. I'm often involved in amateur friends' productions.

I have a few unusual hobbies, including free running and tightrope walking.

I have an active social life, most of my friends are in their twenties like me and we go to alternative theatre/arts shows and clubbing.

bejeezus Fri 27-May-11 16:45:47

wow! no offence intended to anyone--but isnt this thread entirely sexist?

to suggest that have interests/hobbies/ passions/ to be GOOD at sport is 'UNMUM LIKE'???!!!!

and also a bit elitist?--more FUN than other mums? come on....

after reading this, I would have to say then; I am unlike other mums because I am not entirely defined by being a mum and I dont feel the need to compare 'my way' with how everyone else does it

WeirdAcronymNotKnown Fri 27-May-11 16:54:24

We don't have any tv channels - we disconnected it a few months back after realising we were hardly watching it anyway (ie it's not a moral crusade or anything, we just can't be arsed with it). Still watch DVDs a-plenty and play wii though.

I am really really pro-homeschooling but we've decided to send DD to school as she is really excited about it. Will HE in a heartbeat if it's ever necessary. I am currently reading a lot about autonomous education and related topics and it's really changing my view of education as a whole.

Trying to avoid gender stereotypes - not banning pink or anything extreme, but I encourage my DCs (1 of each) to play with whatever they want - DD loves trains, DS loves dolls etc.

WeirdAcronymNotKnown Fri 27-May-11 16:55:21

It's a bit of fun bejeezus, you're overthinking it smile

TheMonster Fri 27-May-11 16:57:49

The fact that I don't put DS first makes me unusual. I am not at all maternal and I have been called a reluctant mother.

AngelDog Fri 27-May-11 19:30:10

Not bothering to close stairgates. It's unusual amongst my mum friends at least.

PotatoWaffle Fri 27-May-11 20:04:22

And stupid some might say AngelDog. There are things to be relaxed about but broken necks or fractured skulls are something to avoid.

AngelDog Fri 27-May-11 20:29:28

To be fair, he's slipped 3 times in 8 months, and that only while being distracted supervised by DH. We have 2 flights of stairs and he's up and down at least 20 times a day. Lots of people have commented how safe & confident he is at climbing.

Reality Fri 27-May-11 20:31:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Reality Fri 27-May-11 20:32:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RobynLou Fri 27-May-11 20:35:21

we've never even had stairgates fitted.

I take DD's to work with me, which is a bit odd in my circle.

NorksAreMessy Fri 27-May-11 20:48:34

We only had one rule, ' be kind', we let the Dcs (17 and 14) choose their own schools, we allow them to drink wine with meals, talk to them as adults etc. Not amazing or unusual for us, but for the Dcs friends, apparently we are 'liberal' parents.
DCs are both well behaved and calm, though. We might well have behaved differently if they had been little horrors!

jbcbj Fri 27-May-11 21:01:32

i don't always close the stairgates either....and i'm much less fussed by drawings on the walls/mess etc than many (inc dh...grin). what gets me the most weird looks though is tandem carrying - dd (2) on the back and ds (2 months) on my front.

Oblomov Fri 27-May-11 21:59:06

I take 'benign neglect' to a new level.
I don't believe that children are the centre of the universe. They are only one member of our family.

bidibidi Sat 28-May-11 13:40:51

Doesn't your back break doing that, jbcbj?

jbcbj Sun 29-May-11 12:52:31

strangely, no - my dd is a tiddler though. i feel quite balanced (and have a wonderfully firm set of gluteus maximi...grin <blows own trumpet>)

greencolorpack Sun 29-May-11 12:56:14

I hate Mothers Day and avoid church every year because of Mother's Day and the fuss that's made.

I hate Mother's Day, I feel emotionally messed up on that day and so don't appreciate other people hassling me "You should enjoy it for the kid's sake." Knowing you feel like crap and it's on a day when you're supposed to be all jolly and happy is the worst thing in the world. Like feeling depressed at Christmas, it's against the law you'd think.

This year dh took the children to church and I stayed well out of it, went into town on my own for the day, that's my kind of Mother's Day.

FilthyRichAndCatflap Sun 29-May-11 15:01:36

I take nights and weekends away by myself away from my kids and DH (mostly for music gigs but sometimes just for some me-time). They think it's great, I love it, so it works for us, but most of my friends think I am unnatural and probably having an affair weird.

I also quite often take the kids away for weekends and short hols by myself when DH is working away. Friends cant understand how I cope!! I even do all the hotel bookings and driving by myself!!

I should add, DH is very hands-on when at home and often has the kids to himself overnight/weekend and manages perfectly well, and enjoys it. My friends think it must be very stressful for me to be "able to leave" 'my' children with their dad....I just respond that I started training him from an early age so that he COULD cope with such a situation grin. It isnt stressful at all!

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