How to build confidence in a 4 year old?

[turkeyboots]

My DD is 4 and at home is a lively, chatty, very condfident thing. But around other people she's very shy. Pre-school and nursery staff describe her as timid, which isn't the little girl I know. What can I do to help her be more confident?

[Campaspe]

It could just be a stage in her development. I remember being very shy as a child and am not as an adult. It's good that your DD is so chatty and confident at home. You can encourage her to socialise with other children and to speak up at school, but I don't think there are any quick answers. You may well find that she blossoms once she starts school and gradually grows in confidence.

[cadifflur]

Do you know any other mums with children at the same pre-school and could invite one over to the house? - having a familiar child in her own surroundings might help her confidence levels and start mixing a bit? or are there any soft play sessions held at a time when you don't work and she's not in nursery/school? - softplay has really helped build up confidence in DS (4) and DD (2) (not that DD needed much help!). same goes for play parks, where they've not known the other children, but have been playing alongside them and building their own confidence climbing etc.

[turkeyboots]

Thanks, we've been doing playdates etc, and she gets on really well with other kids generally, but larger group environments seen hardest for her. And she'll rarely speak to another adult - even nursery staff she's known for years. Its so sad to see her like that.

[tiddlerslate]

My DD1 was very "shy" at nursery but is now in reception year and is much happier chatting to adults. The staff at her school are all very kind and approachable and I think my DD has just grown in confidence as she's got a bit older.

I sometimes think that nursery/school staff seem to think all kids should be the same and if you are not loud and in your face then you are automatically 'shy' or 'timid'.